Children's party, lunch etiquette

[FisherThem]

Mum to DD4, just starting the round of while class parties. Went to a soft play party, 1230-1430, lunch included.

Was I being unreasonable to assume that there would be some refreshments for parents as well as kids?

OP, I think you've agreed that YABU, really. But to reiterate:

No, it's not normal to feed adults at a soft play party. Do what you want at home. I only ever had parties at home for my DC so fed everyone, adults and dogs included - but didn't expect to be fed at a soft play place. However, I would not expire if I didn't eat between 12.30 and 14.30 and I dare say I am not alone.

Jam sandwiches are normal, but are a crap excuse for a sandwich and I never served them. However, I was also aware that children eat crap at parties, so it never bothered me to worry about precisely what crap it was that they were ingesting.

I would take a deep breath and prepare to let your standards slide.

Even the Queen had jam sandwiches - she liked jam pennies as part of her afternoon tea. It's definitely a normal sandwich filling.

Really craving a jam sandwich now! On cheap white bread, natch!

Personally I've never served nor been served a jam sandwich, but have seen them at parties.

In my experience parents tend to be offered a hot drink, but no food.

I like cheese and jam 😋

Mum to DD4, just starting the round of while class parties.

I read that as ‘white class parties’ 🤣

YANBU, I wouldn’t have expected refreshments but would have made them available myself.

Jam sandwiches are gross.

Yabu, softplay you buy your own refreshments. If it’s a party at your home or a hall it’s usual to provide drinks and a cake / snack for the adults.

Jam sandwich is the only sandwich my child will eat 🤣

Ooh strawberry jam and banana sandwiches on white farmhouse bread, lovely. Or banana and honey, mmmm.

Also sausage marmite and lettuce, amazing. My kids would not agree.

YABU.

And also, jam sandwiches are delicious. I would be over the moon to be offered that at a party 😆

I usually end up minesweeping the leftover sandwiches and crisps the kids have left. Party food rocks.

That's different, being at home you can pop the kettle on and make a pot of tea and adults can pick at the food ready there but to put refreshments on at a soft play for adults is expensive and not the done thing.

DD are 9 and 11 and I've been to many soft play parties. I've never even had a drink bought for me as an adult guest, let alone food, and I wouldn't expect it. From a parent pov it's annoying to attend a lunchtime party because you don't want to buy a crappy soft play lunch for yourself, so then have to eat before or after, but that's how it is.

At soft play or similar I'd expect to get my own. Parties at someone's home then most parents I knew would provide a drink and maybe some food after the kids had eaten. One mum used to do wine and some food for the adults. One of the kids had to be fended off her very boozy trifle!!

Jesus wept- you sound like a parent I’d definitely not want to have anything to do with 😂

Who on earth expects to be catered for at a kids soft play party!?

Personally, I’ve never been to a kids party or hosted one where food and drink wasn’t also provided for any adults staying. I have also never eaten or made a jam sandwich but did know they exist - sandwiches should be savoury in my opinion!

This.
You are in for a big shock, OP 😂
Get this, there are also peanut butter sandwiches out there, peanut butter AND jelly, fish finger sandwiches, chip butty. Oh, yeah, a butty also means a sandwich. A day of discoveries for ya.

Yup I was at the same party .

Definitely not for adults! I had a cheeky cow at my sons recent party say to me she wouldn’t mind a cuppa. I stupidly paid for the parents to have tea and coffee and had a really horrible shock it was £3:40 per cup! So you imagine it’s £69 something for 20 parents and if both came it would be Well over £130. There were 24 kids at my sons party. I was angry for weeks! Surely everyone can buy their own drinks. Thank god I didn’t offer food can you imagine. Prices at softplay for food are not cheap.

btw you’re saying you fed everyone at home - well I hope you did! There is no option of anyone buying anything in your home obviously but in softplay there is options to buy and eat there.

YANBU - I’ve never been to one of the 500 whole class parties of DD6’s last 2 school years and not been offered a beer or fizz and some crisps. It’s a chance for the grown ups to get together too!

@Xmasbaby11 I completely agree, it is such a weird thing… It’s 12:30, I’m starving too… Sure at a soft play you could buy something for yourself but I’ve been at plenty of parties where there is no such opportunity and you just stand around awkwardly, starving…

Yes quite unreasonable because softplay party costs can be extortionate, plus you aren't the guest.
Could you not have bought your own cup of tea?

But surely the invitation wasn’t for you? It was for your child?

did you honestly think the invitation was for you to have a meal at the soft play?

we’re you specifically named on the invitation.

this is really quite odd - I don’t have children but I know not to expect a meal for adults at a soft play party (I have been a to nieces parties there).

True, but not to even have heard of them ‘as a thing’?! I’m really staggered by that. Jam sandwiches even crop up in children’s stories, books etc. It is a bit like saying ‘I’ve never heard of coffee as a thing’ (?!)