AIBU to be cheesed off with shrieking kids on holiday?

[AnnoyedOnHoliday]

Recently my DP took me on an amazing surprise holiday for my birthday a few weeks ago, 4 nights in a beautiful 5 star hotel - definitely a big treat and really outside of our normal budget so obviously wanted to enjoy it to the absolutely maximum. Hotel was absolutely beautiful and facilities/staff were pretty faultless.

I don't want to say it was ruined but definitely marred by the amount of unruly children. The main pool of the hotel had two pool - a smaller shallow one for kids and another larger one bit more suitable for being able to get a proper swim in. Everyday the main pool as well as the kids one was taken over by kids shrieking in rubber rings, splashing and jumping as well as just being smack bang in the centre of the pool so hard to swim. The area was basically taken over by the constant noise of shouting, screaming, crying and small children sprinting into your sun lounger every two seconds. I found it really hard to concentrate on unwinding and couldn't concentrate on reading my book as so noisy and chaotic and obviously found using the pool for swimming quite annoying also.

The hotel was very much in the countryside so we ate the really great hotel restaurant quite a few breakfasts, lunches and 2 dinners. Every single time, early in the morning, late at night children were sprinting up and down the dining room, running into waiters, more of that shrieking again. More examples but you get the idea.

It seemed to be happening in many different families and every single time I'd look over and they'd be just ignoring their kids or encouraging them to run around so they could have drinks/eat their meal without having to deal with them and 9 times out of 10, I'd never see them being reprimanded for being disruptive.

I get that looking after small children is full on and stressful (I'm really not talking about kids crying/distressed as I know that cannot be helped - referencing the running around shrieking behaviour) but AIBU to think to think it's a bit out of order to just zone out and let everyone have their meals and relaxing time ruined because you're in 'holiday mode' and want some time off parenting?

It just felt a bit jarring that we'd paid to be on holiday too and were basically having to endure everyone else kids.

I’ve just been out with DH for lunch, we spent the whole meal with a child looking at us, peeping though the metal balustrade that separated us from their table.
Theyd turned around from their table and was fully up against railing, face pushed up tight to it, if id have moved my fork more than 2 inches to the left I’d have touched the child’s face.
He was quiet but it still did my head in all the same. Parents oblivious, busy eating a d chatting themselves. We ate and left as soon as we could 🤯

I was in a cafe recently on my own. A family including a girl of about 8 was at another table. The girl kept leaving her seat, going over to other tables and full-on having shouted conversations with them with no intervention by her parents. When it came to my turn I looked her straight in the eye, waited until she had finished and said quietly "go away". The look of shock in her eyes was priceless. She went back to her parents and was obviously regaling the outrageous unfairness it all. When they came to leave she tried it again. This time I completely ignored her and stared straight at her father. He mumbled something about her being lively, to which I said "well you should control her better". As they were leaving gave it his best shot. "She is autistic you know".

🙄

I wouldn't let my kids put other people out particularly in a restaurant area.

I wouldn't like them to disturb anybody around a pool really but laughing, shrieking, running and splashing are pretty much the raison d'etre of a pool for them. Like most kids. And they are guests too. So 🤷‍♀️

I'm sorry you were disturbed but ultimately you were in the wrong place. It's horses for courses.

That doesn't make it acceptable.

Why should they?

The restaurant shrieking and running round sounds particularly bad. I’d have had a discreet word with the manager in the hope they’d ask the parents to control their children. There’s no need for it at all. It’s laziness and ignorance on behalf of the parents.

I'm sorry you were disturbed but ultimately you were in the wrong place

Are places where families can go only for families, then? Anyone else is confined only to adult-only spaces?

Seems very at odds with that lovely continental approach everyone here goes on about, with everyone together having a nice tolerant time.

I think it can work quite well at hotels when there's certain times during the day that children (under 12's for example) can use the pool. We seem to see this when we go on holiday and I prefer that with my child too as then I don't worry about bothering other people as much during that allotted time for children.

YANBU for hating it, I hate it too and do my absolute best to stop my children doing it (thankfully past that age / stage now) but around the pool in a family hotel, it is kind of expected. In the restaurant, absolutely NBU. No need for them to be running around shrieking. When we're not taking the kids, I would definitely op for a adult only hotel.

Speaking of the chocolate on the white skirt, the shrieking, running- children happened to us recently in a hotel restaurant whilst parents sat around drinking, totally oblivious. So it was a terrible shame when one small child grabbed a chocolate cupcake then mummy's nice white jacket 😅

Assaulting small children! How lovely!

YANBU.

We live abroad.
Many properties around us get rented out to holiday makers, this time of year is awful. Shrieking, screaming kids who you never hear being told to quiet things down. Parents with music blasting. They are completely oblivious to other people.

And the communal pools are just as bad. Not allowed pool floats etc but they all try and bring them in the pools, and then are rude to the security guards who patrol
pools and grounds when asked to get them out.

Unfortunately some people just don't have any manners.

We went away in June and we'd never let our kids just scream and shout and bomb people in the pools. It's called having respect.

You can have plenty of holiday fun without your kids screaming non stop!

This. My 'kids' are older now (young adults) and I choose to avoid the school holidays for trips away.

If kids splashing in the pool annoys you then yes it’s the wrong place.
No one is confined to adults only spaces but if you’re going to complain your holiday was ruined, largely by kids just existing around you, then clearly you need an adults only place.
A pool with children is never going to be ca
and quiet. It’s about realistic expectations.

As some people have correctly mentioned - family friendly doesn't mean families only? It wasn't a families with kids only hotel so how was I 'in the wrong place'

If we'd booked some big family resort full of kids activities and slides - I agree I don't have a right to moan because I would be the odd one out.

But I do think when booking a 5 star chilled spa type hotel (not in a popular touristy destination at all) - I don't think I should just think 'I'm in the wrong place' and put up with not being able to enjoy any chilled out time.

I once sat glued next to a swimming pool in Portugal watching other people’s young kids because the parents were busy getting pissed and the lifeguard was an idiot. These were parents in their 30s, they clearly had money but no common sense at all. It was THEIR holiday and they were quite happy to let others do the parenting. I didn’t dare move because I would never have forgiven myself if there had been an accident. Equally I have met lovely behaved kids on holiday but it does have to be said many parents do not know how to be a parent.

We can’t do adult only resorts yet but we will for sure when everyone is older

A special treat would have been an adults only hotel. Any hotel that allows children will always be full of kids in the summer holidays.

*Are places where families can go only for families, then? Anyone else is confined only to adult-only spaces?

Seems very at odds with that lovely continental approach everyone here goes on about, with everyone together having a nice tolerant time.*

Of course not. Don't be daft.

But whilst I do not agree with kids running around in restaurants, I think it is extreme not to expect that around a pool where children are present. And yes it happens on the continent too, there will be noise, splashing, shrieking and rubber rings etc. Not necessarily a restful 'read a book and sip a cocktail ' atmosphere.

YANBU to be irritated - but YABU for expecting peaceful bliss in a hotel in the summer holidays? Of course there will be kids in the pool and of course they will be playing.

If the restaurant was really bad why did you keep going back? Was there really no way to request a quieter table or eat elsewhere?

Book out of the school holidays. Two significant bonuses :

i) No kids.

ii) Cheaper.

Alternatively no kids resort.

Basically, if you want peace and relaxation on holiday, then yes, you avoid family resorts / hotels.

There are SOOOOOOOO many other options and times to go.

I am dreaming of the time when I don't have to take my holidays when schools are off.

How dare kids enjoy themselves on their summer break.

IF you dont want kids around, go out of season or adult only.

YABU.
Dont forget you were also a kid once.

1. Don't go away in school holidays - why would you do that to yourself when you don't have to? 2. Choose a hotel with an adults only pool. The End.

There’s a balance though.

There’s a difference between excited splashing and a bit of squealing and prolonged shouting and shrieking just for the sake of it.

I remember being given a bollocking by my parents when my brother and I were making too much noise on holiday and elderly people were nearby trying to relax.

We were taught to consider others basically. The lesson stayed with me and I taught my dc too. It’s basic manners.

I think it’s correct that dc start realising from an early age that their needs and wishes have to be tempered by fact that other people sharing the same space have needs and wishes too.

YANBU op. I was resting beside a pool on holiday recently and a load of children kept jumping in from an height and deliberately splashing all the people who were sun-bathing around the edge.

Their parents were at the other end of the pool in a big huddle gossiping and not paying attention. So I told the dc myself to calm it down a bit please and of course that got the mothers’ attention and one of them stomped over, outraged that I was “telling off” her child!

I told her I wouldn’t have to if she and her friends were paying attention and btw did she think it sensible to leave six to 10 year olds unsupervised in a swimming pool?

I felt sorry for the dc tbh. They had no clue! Later in the week they were running around the dining room where the serving staff were carrying trays of hot tea and coffee. The maitre d’hotel gave them a telling off that time.