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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to be cheesed off with shrieking kids on holiday?

642 replies

AnnoyedOnHoliday · 07/08/2023 14:26

Recently my DP took me on an amazing surprise holiday for my birthday a few weeks ago, 4 nights in a beautiful 5 star hotel - definitely a big treat and really outside of our normal budget so obviously wanted to enjoy it to the absolutely maximum. Hotel was absolutely beautiful and facilities/staff were pretty faultless.

I don't want to say it was ruined but definitely marred by the amount of unruly children. The main pool of the hotel had two pool - a smaller shallow one for kids and another larger one bit more suitable for being able to get a proper swim in. Everyday the main pool as well as the kids one was taken over by kids shrieking in rubber rings, splashing and jumping as well as just being smack bang in the centre of the pool so hard to swim. The area was basically taken over by the constant noise of shouting, screaming, crying and small children sprinting into your sun lounger every two seconds. I found it really hard to concentrate on unwinding and couldn't concentrate on reading my book as so noisy and chaotic and obviously found using the pool for swimming quite annoying also.

The hotel was very much in the countryside so we ate the really great hotel restaurant quite a few breakfasts, lunches and 2 dinners. Every single time, early in the morning, late at night children were sprinting up and down the dining room, running into waiters, more of that shrieking again. More examples but you get the idea.

It seemed to be happening in many different families and every single time I'd look over and they'd be just ignoring their kids or encouraging them to run around so they could have drinks/eat their meal without having to deal with them and 9 times out of 10, I'd never see them being reprimanded for being disruptive.

I get that looking after small children is full on and stressful (I'm really not talking about kids crying/distressed as I know that cannot be helped - referencing the running around shrieking behaviour) but AIBU to think to think it's a bit out of order to just zone out and let everyone have their meals and relaxing time ruined because you're in 'holiday mode' and want some time off parenting?

It just felt a bit jarring that we'd paid to be on holiday too and were basically having to endure everyone else kids.

OP posts:
PinkCherryBlossoms · 09/08/2023 08:17

Being irritated at kids running around etc in the restaurant is fair enough. The pool part isn't, though. If you want a swimming pool that isn't full of DC in the middle of the school holidays, it's on you to go somewhere adult only. And the fact that OP is clearly unhappy about kids merely being present in the pool indicates that this isn't simply about those who were behaving badly, either.

royalwatch · 09/08/2023 08:20

The hotel sounds lovemy! Please share the name so I can go with my kids! I love a kid friendly five star country hotel

Original poster
AnnoyedOnHoliday · 09/08/2023 08:22

PinkCherryBlossoms · 09/08/2023 08:17

Being irritated at kids running around etc in the restaurant is fair enough. The pool part isn't, though. If you want a swimming pool that isn't full of DC in the middle of the school holidays, it's on you to go somewhere adult only. And the fact that OP is clearly unhappy about kids merely being present in the pool indicates that this isn't simply about those who were behaving badly, either.

I don’t think I ever said it was the mere presence of kids? In fact I think I mentioned a few times that I don’t mind kids at all.

I did mention in my previous post tho - It was the super bad behaviour that bothered us made the pool really hard to enjoy

OP posts:
PinkCherryBlossoms · 09/08/2023 08:24

AnnoyedOnHoliday · 09/08/2023 08:22

I don’t think I ever said it was the mere presence of kids? In fact I think I mentioned a few times that I don’t mind kids at all.

I did mention in my previous post tho - It was the super bad behaviour that bothered us made the pool really hard to enjoy

Show quote history

Your OP makes that very clear, actually. This phrase specifically:

'as well as just being smack bang in the centre of the pool so hard to swim'

If it were only the behaviour you had a problem with, rather than simply the physical presence, that wouldn't have been there.

Sure, you tried to walk it back a bit later, but your OP says what it says.

Original poster
AnnoyedOnHoliday · 09/08/2023 08:30

PinkCherryBlossoms · 09/08/2023 08:24

Your OP makes that very clear, actually. This phrase specifically:

'as well as just being smack bang in the centre of the pool so hard to swim'

If it were only the behaviour you had a problem with, rather than simply the physical presence, that wouldn't have been there.

Sure, you tried to walk it back a bit later, but your OP says what it says.

Show quote history

I think you are reading a subtext which isn’t there.

Yes, in the larger pool, kids where physically “smack in the middle” of it in rings,
floaties etc. Meaning it was difficult to use the pool and swim in any direction in it. Which made it pretty unusable for a swim (not even talking about laps or anything)

We obviously couldn’t use the shallow kids pool + kids taking over larger pool = pool extremely difficult to use properly

OP posts:
Mba1974 · 09/08/2023 08:36

You’re not being unreasonable at all!! Family resort complex, absolutely within reason, 5* hotel with a proper pool not to be expected. If your children are disturbing other people then they are behaving badly no ifs no buts. Spent a week early July in a similar hotel with my daughter, interestingly only one other English child similar age, mid teens, and a host of mainly French children between 2 and 12, all immaculately behaved. All having fun with their parents and together, in and out of the pool, but none feeling the need to scream or run around other people or run at all at the pool to be fair. When the toddler got fed up and loud which is completely expected one parent took them off to the other less busy pool or to do something else, if any of them started shrieking (which I genuinely think happened twice) the parents intervened and they stopped. I’d never have let mine behave like that she finds children like that intolerable too. As for running in restaurants I just can’t understand that. If they can’t sit at a table don’t take them and if they do get fed up one of you takes them out. That’s being a parent! Apart from being hideous for everyone else it’s unbelievably dangerous for them and for staff. It’s not “normal kid behaviour”, it’s lazy parenting raising self entitled brats, and I guarantee they’re as badly behaved at school, at home and everywhere else too. Part of growing up is learning how to behave when and where.. sometimes you can run around, scream, jump, cover yourself in paint or mud and be as wild and free as you like, even as an adult.. sometimes you just can’t. Not teaching your kids the difference is doing them a huge disservice.

PinkCherryBlossoms · 09/08/2023 08:38

AnnoyedOnHoliday · 09/08/2023 08:30

I think you are reading a subtext which isn’t there.

Yes, in the larger pool, kids where physically “smack in the middle” of it in rings,
floaties etc. Meaning it was difficult to use the pool and swim in any direction in it. Which made it pretty unusable for a swim (not even talking about laps or anything)

We obviously couldn’t use the shallow kids pool + kids taking over larger pool = pool extremely difficult to use properly

Show quote history

It can't be a subtext that isn't there when you've just reiterated it.

You're totally right about the bad behaviour in the restaurant, running into sunbeds etc and if you'd stuck to that then you'd have a great point. You didn't.

Original poster
AnnoyedOnHoliday · 09/08/2023 08:50

PinkCherryBlossoms · 09/08/2023 08:38

It can't be a subtext that isn't there when you've just reiterated it.

You're totally right about the bad behaviour in the restaurant, running into sunbeds etc and if you'd stuck to that then you'd have a great point. You didn't.

Show quote history

I’m just pointing out that you are being very black and white and have interpreted me saying that kids in the middle of the pool making it unusable means I dislike the “very presence of kids”

I dislike paying the same for something and then being told that my experience is irrelevant because it’s school holidays

You know that guests without kids matter right? That maybe paying for a hotel with shared pool facility and then not being able to use the entire time it is a bit galling?

Family friendly doesn’t mean = families get complete priority and screw everyone else

OP posts:
TopSec · 09/08/2023 08:56

Verv · 07/08/2023 14:32

YANBU.
It does my absolute tits in, so now I wont book anywhere thats family oriented and go for either remote or adult only.

We do exactly the same - adults only hotels - its such a dream, especially around the pool and restaurants without kids and worth any extra it may cosst

PinkCherryBlossoms · 09/08/2023 08:57

AnnoyedOnHoliday · 09/08/2023 08:50

I’m just pointing out that you are being very black and white and have interpreted me saying that kids in the middle of the pool making it unusable means I dislike the “very presence of kids”

I dislike paying the same for something and then being told that my experience is irrelevant because it’s school holidays

You know that guests without kids matter right? That maybe paying for a hotel with shared pool facility and then not being able to use the entire time it is a bit galling?

Family friendly doesn’t mean = families get complete priority and screw everyone else

Show quote history

It's not black and white to point out that the words you wrote mean something and that even as you say you don't mean that, you reiterate that you do. Also, I haven't used the word irrelevant as, ironically, I don't think it would be relevant to my point. If you're not happy you'd be better taking it up with someone who's said it.

Ultimately, when a pool is for communal use not adult only, DC being in there and playing is part of what it's for. You choosing to go in school holidays means there are going to be more DC there. Even if they were all perfectly behaved and no running into loungers, they'd still have been physically present and playing and you wouldn't have got what you wanted because your DP chose a facility and time that didn't offer it.

the7Vabo · 09/08/2023 08:59

I think it’s in between OP.

I think the hotel are somewhat at fault. I’ve never been anywhere semi-nice that didn’t have a no kids after 7 ish policy in the dining room, bar etc.

A lane in the pool would be nice also although perhaps not as standard as the dining room. I was on a campsite in France where we were told no floaties in the pool at busy times as it stops the lifeguard being able to see everyone which seems reasonable.

Obviously the parents are at fault but I think you should have expected it on some level during the school holidays. It can be a struggle for parents to keep their kids under control although some parents just don’t care if their kids encroach on others.

What you should have gone for is a child free hotel.

PinkCherryBlossoms · 09/08/2023 09:00

TopSec · 09/08/2023 08:56

We do exactly the same - adults only hotels - its such a dream, especially around the pool and restaurants without kids and worth any extra it may cosst

Show quote history

Very sensible. We do a slight variation on this, which is only booking places for family holidays that don't take stags and hens.

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 09/08/2023 09:01

Family friendly doesn’t mean = families get complete priority and screw everyone else

Well said!

helpplease01 · 09/08/2023 09:02

I can’t stand it!!! Some Parents have no idea how to teach their children to sit down and behave! It’s astonishing!
The French can do it. Other cultures can do it. Just be firm FFS! Who’s the boss???
I would ban families from establishments if they can’t control their kids. It’s a nightmare for others. So inconsiderate.

frumpalertt · 09/08/2023 09:02

Yanbu. Adults-only places are the best!

OutsideLookingOut · 09/08/2023 09:02

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 09/08/2023 09:01

Family friendly doesn’t mean = families get complete priority and screw everyone else

Well said!

It almost always ends up that way though and by families they just mean children really get priority.

Basketballqueen · 09/08/2023 09:03

You know you can book adult only hotels? YABU for complaining about children in a pool behaving like children in a pool!
You can also book hotels that have an adults only pool as well as one for kids...

DatumTarum · 09/08/2023 09:04

helpplease01 · 09/08/2023 09:02

I can’t stand it!!! Some Parents have no idea how to teach their children to sit down and behave! It’s astonishing!
The French can do it. Other cultures can do it. Just be firm FFS! Who’s the boss???
I would ban families from establishments if they can’t control their kids. It’s a nightmare for others. So inconsiderate.

It's a swimming pool

AllPlayedOut · 09/08/2023 09:04

Has anyone told the OP yet that adult only hotels exist? Someone should really let her know. I'm surprised that no one has mentioned it yet.

Basketballqueen · 09/08/2023 09:05

'The French can do it. Other cultures can do it. Just be firm FFS! Who’s the boss???'

Really? Because we've just come back from France where the kids were very much behaving like this around the pool, and having meltdowns because they were tired and up late, and running around the cafe area, and eating children's menus etc
It's a myth that French kids are somehow better behaved. There as good/badly behaved as their parents allow... same as everywhere else!

DatumTarum · 09/08/2023 09:05

What are kids allowed to do in a pool?

I want specifics

Basketballqueen · 09/08/2023 09:06

French kids, just to clarify. We were one of the few non- French families...

Feetupteashot · 09/08/2023 09:07

I have small kids and other kids drive me crazy. So I mostly book self catering

Rocknrollstar · 09/08/2023 09:08

Children will be children. We only book adults only hotels. It’s quite simple.

Basketballqueen · 09/08/2023 09:08

'Yes, in the larger pool, kids where physically “smack in the middle” of it in rings,
floaties etc. Meaning it was difficult to use the pool and swim in any direction in it. Which made it pretty unusable for a swim (not even talking about laps or anything)'

You need to do better research OP. Unfortunately for you many people with kids still do want to stay in 4/5 star places and the pool would be a MASSIVE draw.
In fact, want to avoid kids altogether, going somewhere without a pool would work

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