People looking after children while wfh

[paws732]

My company operates mainly remotely, so we mostly work from home with occasional office days. We have a lot of Teams meetings for connectivity.

With the summer holidays, I have had meeting with a lot of colleagues who have their children sitting on their laps during the meetings. These children range from 5-8, and they are not behaving themselves either. One child kept putting things on their mum's head, and another was having a tantrum about being bored.

AIBU to think they shouldn't be looking after children while wfh, even if it's the school holidays? I feel it will eventually spoil wfh arrangements for everyone, as employers will not tolerate this is many companies.

Looking after my 9 month old and WFH is one of the most stressful things I’ve ever done 😂 traumatising.

People can not tell me what to do with MY children especially not in MY home.

If you hire me you by my skills for the job, as long as that job is being done you have ZERO say in my family or who is allowed to be in MY home.

Firing people over it or moving the work goal posts is not only a 'control freak' move but it seems ripe for discrimination hearings.

Oh don’t be so ridiculous 😂

Pisses me right off! I’m the only parent of my kids friendship groups who has used holiday club, they’re all balking at the cost, which they had to pay before WFH became common.

It simply isn’t possible to work and look after young kids. And it’s not good for the more self sufficient ones, say 7+ to spend the day on tablets/watching tv, which is honestly what the majority of these kids are doing.

Good luck taking an employer to court for 'discrimination' in that scenario.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

On the slim chance that post is genuine, and I suspect there are people that think somewhat down those lines, unless you have a very niche highly sought after skill set you are deluded.

I think it's the reason many companies are moving away from wfh / hybrid and getting people to come back to offices. That and some people just don't seem to be able to discipline and motivate themselves while working from home.

It worries me as it will hurt everyone in the end, including those who work well from home and hate working in offices. It will also hurt parents who are not taking the piss.

When children are at an age where they need supervision, it’s not acceptable. My teenagers are sometimes around in the house when I’m working, but never interrupt calls. You can’t possibly give work your full attention when you are looking after younger kids.

I understand some latitude may have been allowed during lockdown, when employees not only had their school kids at home, but presumably were expected to supervise some home schooling.
However, as a general rule, WFH is not an excuse to avoid paying childcare.
One gains on commuting time and commuting fares, but one should also have somewhere private to work away from children, esecially pre-school.

WFH during covid with a toddler and reception aged child was like hell on earth, I was neither being a good parent or a good employee, which just made me stressed. I would never choose to do that again, I now have a child about to start school and an 8 year old and childcare has been arranged for everyday of the holidays if I am not on leave. As they get older I might wfh with them there for a few days, but on these days they will just be looking at screens for most of the day, I want to limit that as it isn't good for them.

I agree with you, but money is short at present and there is a shortage of childcare so I think having children at home is necessity. I didn't enjoy having small children at home when I worked, but times were different then - life was easier then.

It’s OK chill out! In my place they encourage to bring kids into the office! I work for a large corp in London!

i over school age

Over 18?

I can tell you that I can have meetings at home without DD2 (14) , 5'11" and ten stone, sitting on my knee and putting things on my head.

It’s the usual bad parenting though isn’t it?

Because if you know that your dc needs attention almost constantly then you cannot work unless you have childcare.
My ds would have been fine and happily watched a screen if I’d ever been in this situation, dd on the other hand would have needed another adult as she would definitely have interrupted me.

This is a sensible response. Is his performance down? If not what's the point in making an issue over nothing?

I don't think it's great, when it suited employers to insist we did this though there was no support or consideration with most. They didn't want staff to leave and felt obliged to make it work taking up a lot of space in pressurised homes. I remember thinking I would be told off usually for what I am being asked to do now. Maybe these parents are now used to it, it's not great for anyone though and not what I would like to do

It's not acceptable where I work - thank goodness. Here, you have to sign a declaration that states you have made arrangements for childcare and your right to WFH can be immediately revoked if that is untrue.
It's totally unprofessional for starters and it's totally impossible to do both. You're either fully focused on your work, in which case your child is in danger. Or you're fully focused on your child, in which case your work isn't being done. Or your fully focused on neither, which is bad both for your child and for your work.
If it's not acceptable in the office, it's not acceptable when WFH.
As far as I'm concerned, that also means no loud music, no TV, no friends "popping in for coffee"

Have you actually read your contract?

Do you realise it's a legally binding commitment?

Are you that invested in your company that this bothers you? Childcare is stupidly expensive and we don't get enough annual leave to cover stupidly long school holidays.

Take it up with the patriarchy not mothers colleagues who are doing their best to juggle.

Often it impacts on colleagues who have to pick up slack / can't progress things due to colleagues being preoccupied.

And it will hurt everyone in the end if we are all made to come back to the office full time because of this.

I wonder if we use the same broker!

I went elsewhere and told her why.

I put up with it during lockdown but there is now no reason for it. It’s not fair on the children or the employee and we will be seeing the effects on the children in the future.

I’m also wondering what a PP does with their 2 year old when they can’t be interrupted. Shut in a room alone?

This is exactly why so many employers are forcing (those of us who do work hard) to go back to the office.

It’s another example of women sabotaging women.

I agree with @FlibbedyFlobbedyFloo tbh. I did used to work from home often , and our generation had to work to prove to our organisations that it was doable. I needed a full time nanny in the house whilst I worked. I do think it's different when the kids are older eg 11-12 plus.

That said, childcare is appalling difficult and expensive for some people, although I don't think that should fall on the employer solely to resolve.

I work 4 days a week, 3 of which are from home and during the holidays I mostly make sure my children are with grandparents or at clubs on WFH days. However, there's 1 day a week (today funnily enough!) where I don't have childcare and I have to juggle and make do. I purposely avoid accepting meetings on this day (unless absoloutely urgent!) as I think it's so unprofessional to have kids walking in, not to mention the work I do is highly confidential and certainly not for little ears given the nature. So instead on these days, I do work that I can easily dip in and out of, get done early morning or late evening or to suit around when the kids are happy to chill on their own for a bit. It's not ideal but is only an issue 1 day a week during school holidays.

I'm very fortunate that I work for a very pro-family, pro working parent company and as long as my work is done, it doesn't matter (within reason) when I do it. I wouldn't personally have accepted a job from a company I couldn't work this flexibly with at this stage in my life (i.e. with young kids).

I do think that if people have a more strict work schedule where they cannot pick and choose their hours, have a lot of meetings at set times, or can't easily work round the kids etc, they should be actively seeking childcare or find alternative work! You wouldn't have your kids sitting in meetings with you at the office, so it shouldn't be any different WFH.

My workplace allows it, in fact during school holidays they say to us that we can WFH all week (we usually go into the office once or twice a week in term time). This applies to all staff in our team so that those without kids can stay home too. If we feel it has impacted how many hours work we have done in the day then we'll work over a bit in the evening. My youngest is 8, and the only thing my kids tend to bother me about in the day is food..