My partner and I have come to stay for a week at the home of the in-laws of one of his best friends. They live in a very beautiful area a few hours drive from us, and his friend, wife and children spend a few weeks here every summer. Last year they came to stay with us for a week. We don’t have guests often and were really happy to see them. We did our best to look after them well - we cooked nice food and gave them our bedroom with the kids on air mattresses on the floor since our house only has 2 rooms.
In return they invited us here this year and we arrived yesterday. The house is beautiful, has a pool in the garden with a view of the mountains. The “problem” is the hosts (friend’s in-laws) are just so so generous and welcoming that it’s making me uncomfortable.
We have a 7 month old baby, our first, and the in-laws have given us their bedroom with travel cot, en-suite etc. They’ve been cooking for us all and extremely kind. I assumed they were sleeping in a spare room but this evening I went to get a glass of water and realized they are sleeping on the sofa in the living room! They are in their 60s and I know that’s not exactly old but still it seems like a matter of respect that they should have their bed. And I know their son is arriving on Friday with his 4 kids. I’m not sure where they will sleep - in the living room too?? Also now we’ve realized we kept them up really late as we stayed talking with our friends in the living room till past midnight the last two nights. Now it makes sense why they didn’t just go to bed when they looked tired.
Of course we brought some gifts, wine etc and plan to do a supermarket shop to contribute, but I feel like this isn’t enough. What if we misinterpreted the invitation and are unwittingly taking advantage of them? Maybe it wasn’t meant to be an entire week, or they assumed we would get a hotel and we’re just offering out of politeness? Then again maybe they just really like hosting and see this as a normal kind welcome. It’s not my culture and I speak their language but not brilliantly so I’m not sure what to think. My partner is lovely but sometimes misses social cues. I’m not helping as much as I normally would as I’m focusing on the baby. What do you think?
IABU - I should relax, enjoy their kindness and stop overthinking.
IANBU - We shouldn’t have accepted such generosity and there’s an etiquette we should be following. If you vote this, I’d really appreciate advice on how I should respond.