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Original poster

Child given melatonin without our consent

996 replies

HuckleberryBlackcurrant · 28/07/2023 22:44

DS6 went to his first sleepover last night, at a close friend's house. 4 other kids were there also, ages 6-8.

His friend's mum messaged to say he was asleep shortly after 9 which I found unusual because he would usually stay up later with all that excitement. But I thought that he was just very tired. We have been very busy recently, he has been in swimming lessons and football and was starting a mild cold.

This afternoon when I picked him up it was casually mentioned that the kids were all dosed with melatonin. I know it's super common to do so but our son has never had melatonin, and we certainly would have said no if we were asked.

It put him into a really deep sleep, causing him to have an accident in the night which really embarrassed him.

I didn't really say anything when my friend mentioned this. I was a bit blindsided, and the party was still going on so I didn't know how best to address it.

My husband is really irritated that they went ahead and dosed our child without our consent. Melatonin has been something we agreed not to give our children unless medically directed. He wants me to say something to the parents. I'm inclined to leave it as he's unlikely to go there for a sleepover again for quite some time. I was thinking we could just bring it up if he ever sleeps there again.

My husband thinks that on principle, you don't give a child anything without their parents' consent, so we should raise the issue and set the boundary now. Our children do play there occasionally in the daytime. Usually he is the non confrontational one and I am the one bringing these things up. Idk if it's because I'm 38 weeks pregnant so I just don't feel like pursuing it?

What would you do? Are we right to be irritated?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
14
SummerPeach · 30/07/2023 19:57

100% this !!!!

SummerPeach · 30/07/2023 20:01

TMess · 30/07/2023 19:56

This thread is one wild cultural misunderstanding. DCFS, police etc would be exactly 0% interested, which thankfully the OP seems to sensibly grasp. Yes, it is super common here. The majority of my DCs friends take/are given it. We don’t use it, and I wouldn’t want them given it without my knowledge or permission obviously, but a quick word to the other parent should suffice.

I’d be shocked if the Olly gummy made your son sleep so soundly though, sounds more like sleepover exhaustion! One of mine at a little younger (pre-reading) thought they were gummy candies at a friend’s house when told they could have some candy from the pantry and ate a LOT. He fell asleep quite early that evening as you can imagine lol but no more deeply than normal nor for longer.

Where are you ???????? Where is it perfectly normal for every kid to be prescribed with melatonin ?????????
so confused and kind of outraged.

OhNoItsThePinkyPonk · 30/07/2023 20:02

This is a criminal offence on multiple levels. If nothing else you might want to give this friend due warning she could be imprisoned if a less tolerant parent than you were to discover she’d been illegally sedating minors.

TMess · 30/07/2023 20:03

SummerPeach · 30/07/2023 20:01

Where are you ???????? Where is it perfectly normal for every kid to be prescribed with melatonin ?????????
so confused and kind of outraged.

Show quote history

Currently live in the US; nobody is prescribed it, they pick it up at any shop. My kids’ dr seems more surprised that mine don’t take it and certainly wouldn’t care if they did.

nocoolnamesleft · 30/07/2023 20:04

People saying that it's fine because it's a naturally occurring hormone, so are thyroxine, insulin, oestrogen, progesterone, testosterone, growth hormone. No one thinks it's fine to blithely give those to a child on a sleepover.

SummerPeach · 30/07/2023 20:04

CaravaggiosCat · 30/07/2023 19:15

Sorry but I'd be very suspicious of anyone who wanted my child to go to sleep quickly and deeply, it's just weird.

That’s exactly why the police need to be informed. And the school. And local doctor practice.

FANCHEA · 30/07/2023 20:05

Are you in the US? It's a highly regulated v hard to get drug on the nhs in the UK.
Either way, I'm horrified! Of course yanbu.

Zoejj77 · 30/07/2023 20:06

I’d be furious such a weird thing to do

cherish123 · 30/07/2023 20:06

I'd be furious.

RampantIvy · 30/07/2023 20:06

FANCHEA · 30/07/2023 20:05

Are you in the US? It's a highly regulated v hard to get drug on the nhs in the UK.
Either way, I'm horrified! Of course yanbu.

If you select "see all" on the OP's first post you will see that she stated that in an earlier update.

Ishallgototheball · 30/07/2023 20:06

You must tell those parents. If not how many other children are being dosed without their knowledge.
That’s a terrible practice and they must be told to stop it immediately.
Where’s their boundary, in 7 years time will they give the kids half an ‘E’ at a party? They have no sense of boundaries.

SummerPeach · 30/07/2023 20:09

FANCHEA · 30/07/2023 20:05

Are you in the US? It's a highly regulated v hard to get drug on the nhs in the UK.
Either way, I'm horrified! Of course yanbu.

Yeah literally this! I just can’t even believe it. “Come to my house for a sleepover kids! Just gonna drug you while you’re in my home, no big deal right.” Disgraceful. The parents should be ASHAMED.
Frankly I’d be concerned for their Children.

SummerPeach · 30/07/2023 20:12

OhNoItsThePinkyPonk · 30/07/2023 20:02

This is a criminal offence on multiple levels. If nothing else you might want to give this friend due warning she could be imprisoned if a less tolerant parent than you were to discover she’d been illegally sedating minors.

Absolutely.

mrsbyers · 30/07/2023 20:13

I’d be really angry , melatonin with certain stomach issues can be really dangerous and in my case after one dose with Crohn’s disease on a flight back from the US I became very unwell and ended up in hospital with a massive flare and internal bleed

Covidwoes · 30/07/2023 20:14

Oh my god, that is outrageous! I'd be livid. Have you contacted the parents directly? I would!

KIMBOHO · 30/07/2023 20:15

I hate to say this as I don’t want to alarm you but I really think you ought to contact the police. Giving melatonin in itself to a young child without parental consent is unacceptable but the biggest concern I would have is rendering a child so they are in a deep sleep is extremely alarming. Children are vulnerable enough but with the added aspect of an entire group being knocked out raises some serious safeguarding concerns. I think coupled with the uncommon bed wetting that occurred on the night and the following night I would be worried and urge you to contact the police. It Could all be innocent but equally, it might not. This is the exact thing that someone with ill intentions would do, the fact they joked and told you, attempts to normalise the medication aspect. This couple need to be held accountable properly so they do not have the opportunity to do this again to other children… which they undoubtedly will if you don’t speak out and if their intentions were are not innocent you have the chance to stop something potentially devastating from happening.

brentwoods · 30/07/2023 20:18

TMess · 30/07/2023 19:56

This thread is one wild cultural misunderstanding. DCFS, police etc would be exactly 0% interested, which thankfully the OP seems to sensibly grasp. Yes, it is super common here. The majority of my DCs friends take/are given it. We don’t use it, and I wouldn’t want them given it without my knowledge or permission obviously, but a quick word to the other parent should suffice.

I’d be shocked if the Olly gummy made your son sleep so soundly though, sounds more like sleepover exhaustion! One of mine at a little younger (pre-reading) thought they were gummy candies at a friend’s house when told they could have some candy from the pantry and ate a LOT. He fell asleep quite early that evening as you can imagine lol but no more deeply than normal nor for longer.

All this. It's very normal in the US. You can buy it in the grocery store.
A .5 mg child's gummy won't knock your kid out. Still, it's unusual to give a supplement to someone else's child. I wouldn't be concerned that he took it, but I would have a word with mum about not giving him anything in the future that she hasn't run by you first.

Keyworks · 30/07/2023 20:19

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

SummerPeach · 30/07/2023 20:20

HuckleberryBlackcurrant · 28/07/2023 22:44

DS6 went to his first sleepover last night, at a close friend's house. 4 other kids were there also, ages 6-8.

His friend's mum messaged to say he was asleep shortly after 9 which I found unusual because he would usually stay up later with all that excitement. But I thought that he was just very tired. We have been very busy recently, he has been in swimming lessons and football and was starting a mild cold.

This afternoon when I picked him up it was casually mentioned that the kids were all dosed with melatonin. I know it's super common to do so but our son has never had melatonin, and we certainly would have said no if we were asked.

It put him into a really deep sleep, causing him to have an accident in the night which really embarrassed him.

I didn't really say anything when my friend mentioned this. I was a bit blindsided, and the party was still going on so I didn't know how best to address it.

My husband is really irritated that they went ahead and dosed our child without our consent. Melatonin has been something we agreed not to give our children unless medically directed. He wants me to say something to the parents. I'm inclined to leave it as he's unlikely to go there for a sleepover again for quite some time. I was thinking we could just bring it up if he ever sleeps there again.

My husband thinks that on principle, you don't give a child anything without their parents' consent, so we should raise the issue and set the boundary now. Our children do play there occasionally in the daytime. Usually he is the non confrontational one and I am the one bringing these things up. Idk if it's because I'm 38 weeks pregnant so I just don't feel like pursuing it?

What would you do? Are we right to be irritated?

consider the fact that even plasters (bandaids) and calpol require permission from a parent, what the hell were these parents thinking?!?! I mean clearly they haven’t got a brain cell between them.
and no common sense / intuition / instinct at all !!
I really feel for you OP. I’d be SO DEVASTATED.
as others have said - Please inform local GP, the school, the police. This really is 100% a safeguarding issue!
it would be awful if they were teenagers, it is REPREHENSIBLE for a 6 year old.

x2boys · 30/07/2023 20:22

KIMBOHO · 30/07/2023 20:15

I hate to say this as I don’t want to alarm you but I really think you ought to contact the police. Giving melatonin in itself to a young child without parental consent is unacceptable but the biggest concern I would have is rendering a child so they are in a deep sleep is extremely alarming. Children are vulnerable enough but with the added aspect of an entire group being knocked out raises some serious safeguarding concerns. I think coupled with the uncommon bed wetting that occurred on the night and the following night I would be worried and urge you to contact the police. It Could all be innocent but equally, it might not. This is the exact thing that someone with ill intentions would do, the fact they joked and told you, attempts to normalise the medication aspect. This couple need to be held accountable properly so they do not have the opportunity to do this again to other children… which they undoubtedly will if you don’t speak out and if their intentions were are not innocent you have the chance to stop something potentially devastating from happening.

Melatonin does not knock children out its supposed to.aid restful.sleep no.I wouldn't give it to.a,random child and I don't think.anyone on this thread would either be but its hardly a benzo or zopiclone ,also in case you have missed it the Op is in America where melatonin is sold over the counter as a dietary aid again I wouldn't give to.anyone else's child , not sure what you think,the police could do.

SummerPeach · 30/07/2023 20:23

KIMBOHO · 30/07/2023 20:15

I hate to say this as I don’t want to alarm you but I really think you ought to contact the police. Giving melatonin in itself to a young child without parental consent is unacceptable but the biggest concern I would have is rendering a child so they are in a deep sleep is extremely alarming. Children are vulnerable enough but with the added aspect of an entire group being knocked out raises some serious safeguarding concerns. I think coupled with the uncommon bed wetting that occurred on the night and the following night I would be worried and urge you to contact the police. It Could all be innocent but equally, it might not. This is the exact thing that someone with ill intentions would do, the fact they joked and told you, attempts to normalise the medication aspect. This couple need to be held accountable properly so they do not have the opportunity to do this again to other children… which they undoubtedly will if you don’t speak out and if their intentions were are not innocent you have the chance to stop something potentially devastating from happening.

Totally agree. None of it sounds innocent to me at all !! Downright deplorable and sickening the whole thing !!

MeandT · 30/07/2023 20:23

@SummerPeach @KIMBOHO @Keyworks please do RTFT!

She's in the US, the police, school & doctors won't do anything-everyone can buy it in the supermarket.

That doesn't mean it was right. It does mean the only person who can do anything about it is OP - in telling the hosts WHY it was inappropriate. And then not letting DS stay over in their care ever again.

x2boys · 30/07/2023 20:25

nocoolnamesleft · 30/07/2023 20:04

People saying that it's fine because it's a naturally occurring hormone, so are thyroxine, insulin, oestrogen, progesterone, testosterone, growth hormone. No one thinks it's fine to blithely give those to a child on a sleepover.

Nobody is saying its fine but the hyperbole in this thread is ridiculous not one person is saying they would give it ti.a random child 🙄