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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

All old people should sell up family homes for families.

712 replies

benigogo · 27/07/2023 13:13

Not really an AIBU, more a hypothetical question really. This view comes up a lot on MN, and I'm interested in the detail of what people actually imagine when they say it. What type of property should they be giving up? What type of property should they be moving to? How old is old? What about younger people who under occupy a property? For example 2 friend couples, have recently downsized. Both from a 4 bed detached, one to a 4 bed semi, and the other to a 3 bed semi. Their homes were bought, one by a young professional couple, and the other by a couple in their seventies, themselves downsizing. If you hold this view what do you visualise?

OP posts:
loislovesstewie · 03/08/2023 12:53

For crying out loud; don't mention workhouses! I often think that this shower of ---s only have to have that suggested and they will implement them!

RosesAndHellebores · 03/08/2023 14:56

@CaliPistachio Biscuit.

Will they issue Gulag tokens and Mao suits too?

If anyone reposses my home and wants me to live in a multiple occupancy dwelling, will there be provision for two bottles of whiskey and several hundred tablets before they take all my money from my children too?

LadyVictoriaSponge · 03/08/2023 15:23

GasPanic · 03/08/2023 12:31

Better just to tax people out of larger houses.

For example fuel bills tax, which could help reduce carbon footprint and global warming.

Council tax single occupancy only allowed for houses will less that three bedrooms or certain CT band.

That would help transfer some of the wealth from the rich to the poor and the money could be used to build new social housing.

Otherwise we're just going to continue with the ridiculous situation where the old live in massive houses and the young don't want to have kids. Birth rate is dropping like a stone. Who is going to pay for the elderly pensions if there are no kids around ? It's a demographic collapse.

That would help transfer some of the wealth from the rich to the poor and the money could be used to build new social housing.

but it’s not transferring the wealth of the rich to the poor is it? The rich will be just fine because they will be able to afford your proposed taxed increases so they won’t be moving at all, yet again the average person who has managed to buy a family home is expected to sell their home to fund social housing and other peoples life choices. If this was introduced what would be the point in working hard and buying a family home if the end result is you are taxed out of it to fund social housing while the rich are sitting pretty? somehow I don’t think that will be a vote winner and rightly so.

User16496743 · 03/08/2023 15:49

GasPanic · 03/08/2023 12:31

Better just to tax people out of larger houses.

For example fuel bills tax, which could help reduce carbon footprint and global warming.

Council tax single occupancy only allowed for houses will less that three bedrooms or certain CT band.

That would help transfer some of the wealth from the rich to the poor and the money could be used to build new social housing.

Otherwise we're just going to continue with the ridiculous situation where the old live in massive houses and the young don't want to have kids. Birth rate is dropping like a stone. Who is going to pay for the elderly pensions if there are no kids around ? It's a demographic collapse.

That will only affect those on the middle who have mortgages, older people who you are obviously aiming at would probably afford it anyway.

Xenia · 03/08/2023 15:54

We don't really have a demographic collapse as we have the highest net immigration in UK history (over 600k a year)

GasPanic · 03/08/2023 16:31

Xenia · 03/08/2023 15:54

We don't really have a demographic collapse as we have the highest net immigration in UK history (over 600k a year)

Sounds like a great idea.

Likely to get a demographic collapse because we don't have enough houses to house people properly.

Solution - import more people.

Jamtartforme · 03/08/2023 16:35

Do posters really not understand why comparisons with countries that are vastly different from ours (economically, socially, geographically, historically) such as Singapore are basically meaningless??

RedPony1 · 03/08/2023 17:01

CaliPistachio · 02/08/2023 23:14

One of the problems has been the increase in the number of households as the average size of household reduces. Single people of whatever age should be banned from single occupancy living and live in shared occupancy housing and unless the resident of a bungalow has mobility problems, these should be repossessed and resold/reissued to those who do.

Utter madness 😂
I can afford to live on my own, you couldn't pay me to house share.
Such suggestions of these rules is hilarious!!

EffortlessDesmond · 03/08/2023 19:45

Utterly, shamelessly, selfishly... I may be 67 next week, but our home is lovely, and bought outright. We currently have an adult DC back at home. When we move, and we are thinking through various options (one of which is overseas), the BoMaD will contribute to a deposit for said DC, and we shall find something new that works for us, which is likely to be smaller and with a smaller,much more manageable garden. But it won't be a McCarthy & Stone ghetto. DM, at 88, still lives independently very close to shops and facilities. She needed a stairlift to make her Edwardian two-up, two-down terrace suitable long term.

Moneynewpence · 03/08/2023 19:49

watersprites · 28/07/2023 07:55

I don't agree with the idea of expecting people to sell the house they live in, but I thought there was a common understanding that quality of life peaked with baby boomers and is now declining.

I think people get really confused & think that saying it's harder now means it wasn't hard back then & they struggle to ignore their anecdotal experiences eg my neighbours are 25 & paid 600k for their house so that must be extrapolated to all 25 yr olds. Definitely makes debating difficult!

Not confused, there is a lot of sweeping generalisation about all boomers being minted, getting free uni education (when only about 10% ever went), secure jobs for life etc. And the ludicrous idea that because your house has a bigger price tag than when you bought it you have no money worries. I just be sure to pay my next gas or elec bill with a few bricks...

TakenRoot · 04/08/2023 01:06

I hope no one who owns a second home / holiday home is on this thread advocating for older people to be forced out of houses they have bought.

Likewise anyone who works for the property developers, lawyers, estate agents etc who build and market the towers of flats sold off plan, never to be occupied, to foreign investors.

MintJulia · 04/08/2023 02:14

@Moneynewpence ' Not confused, there is a lot of sweeping generalisation about all boomers being minted, getting free uni education (when only about 10% ever went), secure jobs for life etc. '

YANBU. Those sorts of sweeping generalisations ignore the fact that compulsory work pensions only came in in 2018.

A large % of boomers also have zero private pension - not the final salary pot of gold that misinformed people refer to.

Something like 50% of boomers left school at 16, no university, worked from 16-65, few benefits, no maternity leave (finally made available to all in 1993). Many were forced out of jobs when they married or became pregnant, have nothing but the state pension to live on in old age and yet are vilified as 'greedy, selfish boomers'.

Happyfluffball · 04/08/2023 02:36

We should be looking after our old people not punishing them. They were the ones who raised us.

Jamtartforme · 04/08/2023 04:36

Happyfluffball · 04/08/2023 02:36

We should be looking after our old people not punishing them. They were the ones who raised us.

Of course the elderly should be looked after (in the way small children should also be looked after - they’re completely blameless after all, as well as being the future), but they already are in my opinion. They receive a lot of concessions and are the the wealthiest group in society, so nothing suggests to me that we aren’t looking after them.

LittleMissUnreasonable · 04/08/2023 10:26

Single people of whatever age should be banned from single occupancy living and live in shared occupancy housing and unless the resident of a bungalow has mobility problems, these should be repossessed and resold/reissued to those who do.
@CaliPistachio

Batshit response from someone who has no life experience.

My great uncle was raped in the army, never really spoke about it due to shame and had complex PTSD as a result. Never married or had kids. You'd have seriously forced him into a houseshare with randomers, rather than letting him have peace and quiet living alone close to family. My grandma died 10 years ago, would you have ripped my grieving grandad out of the family 3 bed home he spent 60 years in, to go and live in a house share at the grand old age of 85.

I say this again as a married woman with children, single people childfree people get screwed over enough in this country. Let's send them to communes for other singles who haven't reproduced or got married.

LittleMissUnreasonable · 04/08/2023 10:27

My last sentence was sarcastic incase anyone misinterpreted

loislovesstewie · 04/08/2023 10:30

There are lots of people with hidden disabilities who really would suffer in shared accommodation, my son who has ASD really would lose it with others . And then what?

Kazzyhoward · 04/08/2023 10:50

The main problem is second homes, empty investment properties, and holiday lets. They need to be taxed until the pips squeak to discourage people from owning them, or if they really want to own them, then at least get a huge wedge of tax from the owners which can't be avoided/evaded.

Alongside that, encourage students to go to Uni near home so they can live at home and therefore don't take up homes that could be used for families. Most Uni towns have a housing crisis for locals, as investors buy up family homes and convert them into student lets.

As a local, you've no hope whatsoever if you are unlucky enough to live and/or work in a town/city that is both a tourist hotspot and has a University! Your chances of finding somewhere to live as your own home is virtually zero.

woodhill · 04/08/2023 13:10

MintJulia · 04/08/2023 02:14

@Moneynewpence ' Not confused, there is a lot of sweeping generalisation about all boomers being minted, getting free uni education (when only about 10% ever went), secure jobs for life etc. '

YANBU. Those sorts of sweeping generalisations ignore the fact that compulsory work pensions only came in in 2018.

A large % of boomers also have zero private pension - not the final salary pot of gold that misinformed people refer to.

Something like 50% of boomers left school at 16, no university, worked from 16-65, few benefits, no maternity leave (finally made available to all in 1993). Many were forced out of jobs when they married or became pregnant, have nothing but the state pension to live on in old age and yet are vilified as 'greedy, selfish boomers'.

Absolutely and probably had to put up with being born in the war or living with the aftermath of rationing

I think if we hadn't had so much immigration since the 90s then we wouldn't be having these problems

I get that there are other factors but it really hasn't helped

MintJulia · 04/08/2023 13:24

CaliPistachio · 02/08/2023 23:14

One of the problems has been the increase in the number of households as the average size of household reduces. Single people of whatever age should be banned from single occupancy living and live in shared occupancy housing and unless the resident of a bungalow has mobility problems, these should be repossessed and resold/reissued to those who do.

Possibly the silliest and most impractical post I have seen this year. 😂

Kazzyhoward · 04/08/2023 13:35

MintJulia · 04/08/2023 13:24

Possibly the silliest and most impractical post I have seen this year. 😂

I'd agree about shared occupancy. My son has just endured 3 years of having to share a kitchen at University. He said it was like living with savages. And these are people he "chose" to live with in the 2nd and 3rd years, so people he actually liked and was friendly with. The only way he survived it was having his own en-suite bathroom, and having a small fridge, kettle and toaster in his room so he could avoid the kitchen as much as possible. He liked the people, would go out socialising and for day trips with them, but just couldn't do with the shared kitchen due to the mess, filthy cooker & microwave, piles of dirty dishes filling the sink and worktops, mouldy food in the fridge, etc. Not to mention his flatmates stealing his stuff, i.e. bread, milk, etc leaving him short when he wanted it! These were people he was friendly with!

He's just got a job in a different city where flats are ridiculously expensive and hard to get, so we'd suggested a flat/room in a shared house (which are also expensive and hard to find, but slightly easier/cheaper). He was adamant he wasn't going to risk it and so is paying through the nose, using his savings, to pay a stupid high amount for the only flat he even managed to secure a viewing for, out of town, not a good location, but to him, not having to share a kitchen (and especially not a bathroom) is essential.

He's not ND, doesn't have ADHD, nor OCD, or anything else like that, perfectly normal, and never thought he'd have a problem with sharing a kitchen, but it's been a nightmare for him. He naively thought other people would be even slightly civilised, but apparently not!

woodhill · 04/08/2023 14:10

They do to some extent. Dds accommodation was a small room as was ds

Kazzyhoward · 04/08/2023 14:36

Some do, particularly the out of town "campus" style ones such as Warwick, York, Lancaster, Durham, who have a lot of Uni-owned accommodation on site, but even then, it's usually mainly for first year students, so most second and third year students live in nearby towns/cities. There's simply not enough land on site for places like Lancaster and York to treble the number of their "on site" flats to accommodate all their students. Obviously, Unis located in cities don't usually have the land to build their own new accommodation blocks and are often restricted/limited by existing buildings and existing site size, so new blocks are usually built by private developers on whatever nearby sites they can source, but again, still nowhere near enough for all students, so most will live in converted family houses etc., often in the same suburbs and commuting workers!

The problem is the massive growth in numbers going to Uni these days, not just UK residents, but also huge numbers from abroad, who also need somewhere to live. The politicians who presided over the growth in Unis don't seem to have realised that students need to live somewhere. Hence, why I think there should be a push or incentives or whatever to encourage students to go to a more local Uni and live at home, especially as many lectures etc are online these days, so less need to actually be "on campus" every day.

Yalta · 09/11/2023 17:32

I sold my house to upsize as dd and ds are buying a place with me that can be divided into 3 homes. I come from an extended family and really have difficulty with families buying individually when together they could afford much more

Jaigog · 16/02/2024 22:25

Hi, we are a young family with a little boy who will go to school next year. We are looking for a property to buy and really loved one. The only reason I am not able to make a decision yet is the most residents in the neighborhood are elderly people. The owners have been living there for 46 years. There's a Sainsbury's superstore within 10 minutes' walk and when we visited it we saw only two couples who were young and the rest of the customers were all 60+ people. Where we are living now had 3 supermarkets near us and never saw that many elderly people at one time in a store. Will this be an issue for us especially for the little one if we buy this property? I am worried if he will have any peers in the neighborhood.