Children should be told to give up their seat on a bus if there's an adult who finds it harder to stand.

[DesolationRow]

I was on a packed bus today with my friend who's in her late seventies. She's not frail but is clearly an older woman who walks quite slowly and hasn't got the best balance. We were going to the seaside and as it's the first day of the school holidays there were lots of families with young children on the bus. Many of the seats were occupied by children from toddlers to early teens and absolutely none of them offered her their seat and their parents neither told them to nor offered their own seats.

Do most people now really think a child should have a seat of their own when there's someone who needs it more? If so, why?

I realise there will be some children with disabilities/ conditions that mean they do need a seat of their own but most preschool children can sit on their parents lap and most children over five can stand for a bus journey can't they?

That's what she did. The first family, one adult and three children between about 4 and 12, completely ignored her. My friend obviously then felt embarrassed to have asked. So I asked a different mum with a toddler on the seat next to her if she'd mind putting the toddler in her lap so my friend could sit down. She did it, but with bad grace.

I wouldn’t allow my children to stand if lots of other able bodied adults could first.

I think you have to be direct and ask for a seat. I have had parents ask their children to offer me their seat on occasion and have always been very impressed when it happens.

Not smaller teens? Do you mean shorter or younger?

To me it’s inexcusable for an able-bodied person to occupy a seat on a bus or tube when they can see someone else might need it more than they do. The CEO comment above is just ignorant. Scarcity of resource should be dealt with in a needs-must basis.

I'd hold my toddler on my lap and get my preteen to stand but I wouldn't give up a seat and stand with a toddler okn my hip or hanging on my leg as that wouldn't be safe for them. Fine for older kids 7+ or adults to stand but little ones usually need the seat

Actually I wouldn’t allow my child to stand at all as it’s not safe.

Yes older children and young teens should’ve offered definitely - empathy levels have declined in the last 10-15 years since children put down books and picked up smart phones. So many people are entirely self serving these days.

This isn’t really about children giving up seats. It should have been anyone more able-bodied than your friend. Personally, I’d have given up mine and left my children sitting.

I try not to have my son on my lap, I'm short so my lap is a downward slope and he's bloody heavy these days, but I will stand next to him and let someone else sit, definitely.

I've quite loudly asked "is anyone able to stand so this gentleman can have a seat?" (Already standing myself)... I confess I've been too engrossed in watching something with earphones in to realise how busy the bus had actually got before, but I'm pretty sure that time most were pretending.

I would only expect someone who is safely able to stand to give up a seat. I need a stick to walk but I wouldn't expect a young child to offer me their seat any more than I'd expect a very elderly person to.

I was once belittled by a woman in her 60s for not making my 3 year old give up his seat. What she didnt know was that we had travelled by train and boat from the other side of Ireland for over 24 hours for my grannys funeral, we were all tired and stressed and emotional - and no, I wasnt giving up a seat my young child, or I, needed so she could sit down for 30 mins.

You sound nice.

@MichelleScarn you don’t feel like shit though. You feel entitled.

@LocalHobo same here, I remember hating sitting on my Mum’s knee as I got older and eventually decided to stand instead but there was no question that as a child I would have been occupying my own seat when there was any adult standing, less able or not!

You are right op.children,teens and able bodies adults should move.As kids we always have way for adults of anyone needing seats,these days kids are taught to be selfish and entitled sadly by parents who have no a whisper of empathy.

But you have no idea what that woman had also been through that day and why she needed a seat? How do you know she hadn't been to a funeral? Or had a horrible life changing diagnosis? Any number of things could have happened. You say she didn't know what you'd been through. But you also had no idea about her.

You don't get a bus pass until you are 66 and you can only use it in your area.

I am 69 and just spent a week in London. Had to pay on the buses

My kids would fall over. They have little legs and get tired easily too. After a busy day I would not make them stand over an adult. Able bodied adults should of course offer a seat to someone less able.

Agreed. If I’d tried to hang on to my seat as a kid when an elderly person needed it my mum would have tanned my backside. All kids stood up when an older person needed a seat. We were taught to do it by parents and by school staff. Not one child ever fell over by standing up. I am absolutely appalled to see parents letting 8 year olds sit when pensioners need the seats.

Yes we were always told to give an adult a,seat in fact on my school.bus there was one lady who always demanded any school.age child give their seat up.for her she would have Been in her 40s then no.disabilities ( that I was were aware of ) she always said she paid full price and kids only paid half price that was her reasoning🤔
Bus this was the 80,s so very different .

I made a judgement based on my and my son's circumstances - there were plenty of other able bodied people on that train but she didnt ask them, she asked for my 3 year old's seat

You also seem to have missed the fact we hadnt slept in over 24 hours. She had obviously been shopping...

Children shouldn't stand, not unless they are mid-teens, and tall and strong enough to do so safely.

The adults should have given up a seat - but then, you don't know if they are pregnant/bad back/whatever. They may have needed the seat more than your friend.

Someone on the bus should have offered.

Round here, no one is allowed to stand. If the bus was full it would have sailed past the bus stop with a shrug from the driver.

Ok, I suppose we should all just roll over and accept cramping onto buses. Not due to "scarcity" (as someone above put it) but because a few are taking out huge pay packets at the expense of the many.

When I was at school we would have given up our seat on the bus for any adult regardless of age/infirmity. It was considered well mannered. Changed days.
No accidents befell us either. Standing holding on wasn’t that hard🙄