People becoming increasingly rude and self entitled

[SusanandMidge]

A friend was told to fuck off by a delightful woman at the weekend when she asked a bunch of adults (late 20s, early 30s) to turn off the loud music they were blaring from the pavement and singing along at top volume to at 11pm.

On Saturday I had a woman with a young child in the car refuse to reverse when she was driving the wrong way in a car park and our cars met. She insisted I reverse and even opened her window and said a sarcastic 'now was that so hard' when she passed me.

My neighbour was berated by an affronted father, one night last week, for asking a child aged about 12 who was creating an absolute racket outside her house at about 10.30pm and refusing several requests to move, where she lived so she could speak to her parents. Apparently she really upset the child who arrived home in tears!

Is it my imagination or are people becoming increasingly self entitled and highly indignant when asked to show a bit of consideration or manners to others?

I work in customer care and the stories I could tell are hair raising

The other day,I had two customers in the queue

The woman went to pay with a £20 note but her bill was £22.65 so she asked if I'd mind waiting while she ran to the car for change

Fine-only the bloke behind her went mental-screaming at me to open the other till (I cant),put his order through while 'that daft bitch fucking goes for her money' (I cant) and that he 'deserves some free food for waiting' (so he wanted his whole order for free-food he hadn't ordered yet)

The lady came back a full 45 seconds later,I put her order through and she walked off

The bloke then ordered a massive order and refused to pay for any of it as 'he'd been kept waiting for 15 minutes,just to order'

Thankfully the manager who was on that day,is a massive bloke who takes no crap from anyone and just threw him out-still screaming that he 'is entitled to free food'

Within ten minutes I was being screamed at again because the downstairs (disabled but anyone can use) loo was locked (someone was in there) and she 'really needed to go'

That's fine but when I tried to get her to use one of the 4 loos upstairs (you can either use the lift or the stairs) that wasn't good enough and I was meant to boot out whoever was in the downstairs loo

The amount of time she spent screaming at me-she could have been upstairs and down again 5 or 6 times

She finally got into the disabled loo and pissed all over the floor

I need a new job-away from the public

You're not wrong.

We got back from a cruise recently and the behaviour of some of the other passengers on board was so selfish and entitled.

Examples:

• on arrival of a lift, barging in front of someone in a wheelchair to get in the lift first and making the disabled person wait for another lift
• or, pressing the door close button in the lift as soon as the doors had opened, to avoid having to share the lift with anyone else
• constant slamming of cabin doors at unsocial hours without any consideration for the neighbouring cabins
• smoking in non-smoking areas
• refusal to use the provided hand sanitiser and hand wash stations at the restaurants, resulting in numerous colds and Covid being spread around the ship
• Sun lounger wars - some people were seen reserving sun beds in multiple locations on the ship so they could follow the sun around as the day went on
• Refusal to parent their own children, in favour of making the most of their drinks packages, leaving their kids to get bored and cause chaos around the ship.
• Using their phones in a darkened theatre. Not to take photos of the show or anything, just to browse their photos from the day, or message someone. If you're that bored of the show, leave it! Don't disrupt people around you by being inconsiderate!
• Allowing their kids to push in front in queues - "ah, they're just a child"

I'm sure more will come to me. Thankfully I don't experience too much of this in the "real world", but sticking 4,000 people together on a cruise ship seems to put the behaviour under a microscope.

There was a facebook group for our cruise and there were lots of people moaning about the selfishness, rude and entitled behaviours of some passengers so, like with this post, I hope some of the people that do these things see them and learn from it.

Unfortunately I suspect they're too selfish to actually change...

Our leaders are incompetent, corrupt, thieving liars and adulterers and we keep voting them in. People are taking note that being a selfish, shallow, racist, misogynistic bastard is the way to get on in life.

Bit OTT - so spoiled your argument

I think it has a lot to do with a growing culture that allows/ encourages people to claim that they or their child have anxiety/ ADHD/ autism/ MH issues, which apparently mean that social norms do not apply to them. For people who really are neurodiverse or mentally unwell, we should all be way more accepting and tolerant, of course. But it has become the default whinge when anybody doesn’t get their own way…”I suffer from anxiety so [whatever]’.

Was this Brits or all nationalities.

I've noticed people pulling out in front of me when I'm driving a LOT recently. The Highway Code states you should never make someone show down or stop, yet I have to slam my brakes on almost every time I drive. It's like they judge whether you'll actually hit them, and if not they'll pull out because they're more important than you.

*slow down

You’ve just confirmed my worst fears about cruises @TenderDandelions.

Wow, how old are you?! 😂

I agree with this post.
There's definitely an anger, but equally, this behaviour has been about before covid.

I think we're an intolerant society, and I count myself in that at times, because when I had absolute delinquents for neighbours, and I was ill, I was intolerant to everything. Never rude to people, but I could easily have been.

Now I'm chill, but where it was odd to see the old me, an angry little hobbit, a lot of people seem to be on the edge nowadays.

Shamefully all Brits... we won't go in school holiday again.

Thankfully the manager who was on that day,is a massive bloke who takes no crap from anyone and just threw him out-still screaming that he 'is entitled to free food'

Different circumstances admittedly, but that's why our local foodbank had to close; the volunteers simply couldn't take any more, especially when the verbal attacks started to turn into physical ones and thieving began not just from the foodbank but the actual staff as well
Even the attendees' kids were joining in, and of course when challenged the parents instantly insisted "they have ADHD"

Nobody pretends those attending were necessarily in easy circumstances either, but to attack and steal from those trying to help ... ?

Don't get me wrong, we had a fab time still, but the behaviour of some guests was like nothing we ever saw cruising pre-Covid.

I think I'll stick with Celebrity next time. If it happens there too, then I'll rethink cruising!

This is the price we pay for getting rid of religion. Once upon a time everyone had it drilled into them, sometimes several times a week, on how to behave and how to treat others. Combine this will the belief that you were being observed and monitored all the time and you'd be punished severely if you didn't watch yourself. Apart from a few psychopaths and criminals, most people took on board at least some of what was being said.

Even Richard Dawkins has said that religion plays a role in moderating people's behaviour. Enjoy everyone else's atheism for everyone now believes they're god and the centre of their own grotty universe.

I think we're being asked to tolerate a lot more nowadays. Years ago if you complained to a neighbour about their child's behaviour or asked someone to keep the noise down you were more likely to get an embarrassed apology that a mouthful of abuse.
Nowadays anyone who complains about anything is branded a 'Karen' and the annoying behaviour is augmented to 'teach them a lesson'.

Interesting you should say that, TenderDandelions; I've been on many cruises, but never an almost exclusively British one before recently sailing from Southampton on P&O

Let's just say the difference was stark ...

Well, when you get rid of communities, and replace them with individuals living on their own, who don't need or want to interact with their neighbours, its inevitable.

Rubbish. I'm an atheist, as are most of my family and friends, and we don't behave with entitlement. We know how to behave without fearing god or weekly reminders. If the terrible parking outside our community church is anything to go on, religion doesn't necessarily stop you behaving like a knob.

And it’s a cycle, because the more rude, ass-holey people you meet, the more irritated and intolerant of others you personally become.

People used to have a sense of belonging - to their communities, to their Church, to their wider extended family. For many people all of that seems to be gone nowadays - communities have broken down, less and less people attend Church services, families are more scattered, complex and often chaotic. It seems to have led to this 'my little unit' attitude you see on here so often, where people really can't see out beyond their own immediate circumstances to the needs and rights of other people.

@DewinDwl absolutely- you now have 2 new entrants to House of Lords who appear to have done nothing of significance in public life either.

And people who use the word sheeple aren't much better.

It's all by design though. A population of independent people, by independent I mean not dependent on one another, is easier to control.

The government knows this. So they propose policies which create dependency on the state, not the community. It makes for a vastly more efficient revenue stream.

It's easier to impose charges on individuals who are dependent on you, than it is to impose charges on an independent community. So council tax can be increased without objection. ULEZ can be put in without consulting the community. People can be mistreated without the rest of the community caring about it.

It's just easier to deal with one person objecting about something than several hundred.

I worked on cruise ships about 10 years ago and honestly, it doesn't sound like things have changed.

-We had people who insisted they had the right to be naked wherever they wanted (family cruise)

-People who tried to insist the ship wait for them in port (we never did)

-People who actually kicked off that the helicopter taking the crew back home every night was keeping them awake (we lived on the ship - no helicopter)

-People who actually broke into the shops while the ship was in port and complained that no one would serve them (they are closed during port stays)

-People who try to insist that the ship timetable works around them (ie, didn't want the midnight buffet to be served at midnight because it was too late, didn't want the ice show to be on at that time because they wanted to skate etc)

-People who REQUESTED a different onboard show in the theatre.

-People who complained about the ship moving

-People who complained that the interior cabins didn't have natural daylight...

on and on and on.

The world still seems polite to me. I wonder at the demographic of rudeness, because it would not surprise me at all if those at the bottom of society have to fight harder than ever for pay and basic respect or those who have made a choice to be there make it hard.

Public life in England depends on class, and at the top end people are still polite. Public spaces like buses and trains are getting worse, and that's when I notice people playing music, shouting or swearing.

It's because those people don't do manners, which was the old way of doing things in England, but now you need rules to control what happens.

In places where manners culture still works, England is a great place to be.