am I supposed to just not work and accept I will lose my job? What the hell can I do here?

[flexibilitya]

DS started nursery in May. Since then he’s been off more than he’s been in. I have 3 days annual leave left for the rest of the year!!! What am I supposed to do? He’s obviously going to be unwell again. I have zero practical support and DS’s dad has no involvement. Work are accommodating but by now I can tell they know I am doing very little, I worked through the nights last week but my job is not one you can just do on no sleep, it’s hard, I’m paid well. I feel like giving up. How can this be sustainable?

If your DS has been off with tummy upsets, is it possible he has an undiagnosed lactose intolerance? My daughter's nursery were forever calling me to say she had an upset tummy and would need to be kept home for two days, turns out she had a mild lactose intolerance and it was the yoghurt they provided for pudding once a week.

I would look at a childminder. Childminders may or may not be less strict, but your little one is likely to catch less if he is mixing with many less kids.

It’s brutal. We had a childminder and the illnesses were hard but almost manageable. Then just before he transitioned to nursery at 2 he got covid. That messed his immune system just before going 4 days a week to nursery October last year. We had 6 months where he was off nearly every week - then a big one, he was off for 10 days. Plus me and my OH were catching half the stuff and getting no sleep.

by February I had had responsibilities taken off me, moved to a different manager. Told I had to take holidays when my work is a large organisation and allow paid parental days (but manager discretion so they said no). Had to work over xmas as no holiday left, swap between me and OH, stopped telling them when he was off and just winged it (easier when there’s two of you). Some grandparent help when he wasn’t super contagious. Absolutely horrid…..but it happens and you’ll get through it. I’m back to normal work load at work and things have been more settled.

every doctor we saw said the same thing - if you don’t have this at nursery you’ll have it in P1 and they’ll be off school most of their first year.

it’s just one of those things that seems to be a right of passage that no one speaks about until you have your own kids 🤷🏻‍♀️.

but if you can’t make it work - then I definitely found a childminder better. The illnesses were more mild, less gastro bugs,
And breaks in between bugs. Instead of getting something new every week.

hope things get better soon!!

It might be because not all kids go through it.

Neither of my kids have ever been that ill, my son was sick for the first time last year and he was 9.

I know it’s sheer luck, but yes, this was pretty much my experience too. With three of them.