Aibu to think pregnant women should be offered a seat?

[Hufflepods]

Travelling at least twice a day with changes in London and I’m noticing that it’s less and less common to offer a pregnant woman a seat.
I feel like it wasn’t like this during my last pregnancy but this time it almost seems to rare for someone to offer!
I’m 34 weeks pregnant and due to a mixture of sickness and low blood pressure I get really faint in stuffy, busy spaces ie standing on a busy tube. I’m sure that isn’t really unique and many pregnant women feel similarly.
Occasionally someone else also standing will go up to people sitting and ask can one of them let me sit down.
One time I felt truly horrific and could feel my head spinning I asked the people who were in or near the priority seats but they all pretended not to hear me ask about 3 times and then I fainted so that really put me off asking in future.
I kind of feel like the people who look up multiple times and see you standing in front of them then look back down and ignore you are exactly the sort of people to ignore or say no when you explicitly asked which was sort of proven when I’ve asked’
As a side note I’m 34 weeks so a pretty substantial sized bump, fairly petite in general so it’s obviously bump and isn’t hidden under coats due to the weather, plus I wear the badge.
AIBU to think people are just ruder than ever now?

Is it now an unreasonable opinion to think pregnant woman should be offered a seat?

You may well have been running at 40 weeks pregnant but surely you must have noticed that far from running at this stage most pregnant women are suffering from swollen joints, back pain, exhaustion etc and if they are still working and commuting and going home to small children after a long days work they could do with a seat, particularly in hot weather.

I despair at the lack of empathy, consideration and basic manners on this thread. Very depressing.

@GuitarsInHeaven I was still running and exercising the days before I went into labour.

I'm not really sure on the relevance of that, or what point you are making? Unless you're suggesting the only pregnant women who need a seat are unfit and can't walk the length of themselves.

Pregnant women also don't just need a seat due to being tired I commuted in London pregnant and found standing made me feel unsafe as my balance was off and that I may fall if the train wobbled. It's not hard to have a bit of empathy and offer up a seat.

@Hufflepods

I bet you stand on the tube sneering and looking pissed off

in all likelihood that will put people off offering for fear of being the butt of your wrath

Based on what exactly?
The posters who need an empath bypass are the ones more likely to be sneering.

Yes I think it’s obvious who would be angry and sneering and it wouldn’t be the OP!

I asked the people who were in or near the priority seats but they all pretended not to hear me ask about 3 times and then I fainted so that really put me off asking in future.

so you asked multiple people and they all ignored you. 3x.

Sure

were you whispering? Asking them in your head perhaps?

Surely just ignoring?

You said yourself. You asked multiple people not fewer than 3x 🤔 and the ALL ignored you

@Hateitissues Your behaviour is incredibly strange, posting about how I look pissed off on the tube, sneering at people etc while you post aggressive comment after comment repeatedly without being answered.

I’m with you @Hufflepods , I don’t know wtf is wrong with people.

It really isn’t difficult to notice a pregnant woman with a badge and get off your arse so she can sit down.

Sadly people have an ‘I’m alright Jack’ attitude to most things these days.

I'm not really sure on the relevance of that, or what point you are making? Unless you're suggesting the only pregnant women who need a seat are unfit and can't walk the length of themselves.

My god, you are really, really hard work aren’t you. Motherhood is gonna be a long, long road for you.

The fact is, you don’t know why the people didn’t give up their seat. They may have also needed the seat. If they didn’t and you asked them yes, they should have. But not all pregnant women will need seats. My autistic daughter would have possibly ‘ignored you’ and had headphones in and eyes closed....and needed that seat!

You sound so angry op

I was trying to avoid being pissed off and stewing when pregnant

you seem to be looking for ways to increase your BP and stew

Are you working full time?

Is there something wrong with you?

@GuitarsInHeaven statistically though it’s unlikely that everyone in the carriage is unable to give up their seat isn’t it?

My god, you are really, really hard work aren’t you.

I’ve read the whole thread and I’ve come to that conclusion about OP as well. 🤦‍♀️

I think the people using or near to the priority seating are more likely to need it. If I needed a seat, I’d ask those in the non priority seating and further from it.

It’s really important to remember that not all needs for priority seating will be visible. My daughter also has autism, looks fit and healthy but would avoid eye contact, have headphones on, but it sounds like she’d be judged as rude and as someone that should have moved. She would need her seat.

Why are posters being cunts to the OP for having a shit pregnancy, and despite asking politely, wearing a badge and then collapsing, being a bit upset that no one offered her a seat on the tube?!

Jesus Christ. It smacks of an affected attitude (to make themselves feel better at the expense of another) of “I was running marathons and gave birth at mile 19, before I carried on. Pull yourself together you lazy twat, pregnancy is no excuse to require any special treatment. Any ’need’ is your own doing for being so lazy and not as good as me…”

Couldn’t agree more hibiscrubbed, so shocked and depressed that women are so nasty about a pregnant woman.

Of course all disabilities aren’t visible but it’s clearly ludicrous to assume that every singe able bodied-looking person in a priority seat has a hidden disability.

quite. Or that people with hidden disabilities will all fall apart if the op accidentally asks one if they need their seat.

@FinallyLeavingDenver If I needed a seat, I’d ask those in the non priority seating and further from it.

This typically isn’t possible on the tube unless you manage to push past pretty much everyone standing and get down to the opposite end of the aisle.

People are scared of offending someone, but also there are so many hidden disabilities that people have (myself included) which might explain the reluctance of people to move from the priority seats.

It depends, I think. I was in central London at the weekend and got on the tube with the family (including a teen and pre-teen). I asked DSs who wanted a seat (there was one left) and several people half got up, ready to move. We didn’t actually need the seats and the people sat back down again but I am certain that they would have happily moved had I been pregnant or disabled.

You were probably unlucky (and travelling during the rush hour likely doesn’t help) but I would just ask loudly and clearly each time if I were you.

This typically isn’t possible on the tube unless you manage to push past pretty much everyone standing and get down to the opposite end of the aisle.

But that doesn’t mean that if the few people you asked really needed their seat, they could have given theirs up. They probably didn’t realise you were about to faint to be fair.

I wouldn’t get too hung up on this. I always found people to mostly be very helpful, men especially would always offer to help with pushchairs and carrying things on and off trains. Most people are in their own world, others are deliberately rude. You don’t change them so 🤷🏻‍♀️

@NalafromtheLionKing depends on what?

Pregnant women are not ‘unlucky’ not to be offered a seat, it happens way too often for it to be simply put down to bad luck.