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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be fuming with lifeguard/safe guarding officer at gym

380 replies

Dinoswearunderpants · 16/07/2023 19:24

I'm beyond livid and just wondering if I should see things from a different point of view.

My DS is 2 and has been taking swimming lessons since 8 weeks old at our local gym.

I take him swimming 2-3 times a week as he loves the water. It's a great activity for him.

He swims without arm bands for a short distance 3-5 meters then holds onto me or the side of the pool.

He loves swimming, extremely confident and understands the safety in the water i.e never goes to the water without an adult, holds onto the side or adult when in the water.

I took him today and was approached by a lifeguard (who also said she's the safe guarding officer) I've never seen before who said she was 'deeply concerned' about him swimming and him drinking too much water.

I explained we take lessons here and he is holding his breath for the 3-5 meters he's swimming. He wasn't coughing or in any distress.

He would jump in from the side, swim to me, I'd hold him an explain he needs to wait a moment (so he can catch his breath) then he'd swim to the side and jump back in. All this done on his own accord and a big smile on his face.

I asked the lady to speak with his swim instructor, who was there at the time. She said she'd spoken to another lifeguard who had concerns.

Both lifeguards don't have kids and are in their early 20s.

I explained what happened to the swim instructor and her words were 'I'm disgusted they said something, I'm so sorry'.

I appreciate not many 2 years can swim however he can as I've always wanted to ensure he's safe in the water.

I think I'm going to raise a complaint as they say no evidence of distress. My son wasn't coughing or anything. He was having a great time as he usually does.

It makes me not want to take him there any more but I'm still tied into a contract with them.

OP posts:
LiOLeary · 16/07/2023 19:28

Drama llama

spanieleyes · 16/07/2023 19:28

Erm, don't you think perhaps you are overreacting? They had concerns about his welfare, they raised them with you, you have reassured them he is ok and that's pretty much it!

wp65 · 16/07/2023 19:29

I appreciate this experience was annoying, but I don't think you need to raise a complaint.

ilovesooty · 16/07/2023 19:31

How do you know the lifeguards don't have children and why is it relevant?

CaptainMyCaptain · 16/07/2023 19:31

They were doing their job as they saw fit.

Ifyouarehappyandyouknowit123 · 16/07/2023 19:31

I don't think it warrants a complaint. They were just concerned about his safety- I would prefer them to be overly cautious.

CoreyTaylorsSoggyTshirt · 16/07/2023 19:32

She's in charge of safeguarding, she was literally doing her job.

Her age and whether she has kids or not is entirely irrelevant.

KrisAkabusi · 16/07/2023 19:32

You'd rather lifeguards ignored a potential issue? FFS They just can't win. There's been numerous threads complaining about lifeguards not paying enough attention, now you're complaining about ones that are actually doing their job. You're being very unreasonable.

Greenshake · 16/07/2023 19:32

What does their age and child free status have to do with it? You are making a mountain out of a molehill.

CurlewKate · 16/07/2023 19:32

They were concerned. They raised them. You were able to reassure them. Sounds perfect to me. Would you rather they hadn't?

EnjoyingTheSilence · 16/07/2023 19:32

God forbid a lifeguard does their actual job and raise concerns about safety

SnackSizeRaisin · 16/07/2023 19:33

I wouldn't complain, sounds like it was resolved and they were concerned not rude?

They are right to query the situation, that is their job. Better safe than sorry with drowning. Whether they have children is irrelevant.

FlowersInTheSky · 16/07/2023 19:33

Of course YABU to be fuming that someone was looking out for your child.

Spidey66 · 16/07/2023 19:33

I think you're overreacting too. They were a bit concerned but were reassured. I think it's good they were able to raise their concerns even if they were wrong.

WeWereInParis · 16/07/2023 19:34

I thought this story was going to end with them insisting you did things differently. It sounds like you explained, and they left it at that? I wouldn't complain.

Soapyspuds · 16/07/2023 19:34

Being able to swim even a couple of metres is extremely rare, and even if your child can swim a little bit it would not take much for them to start drowning if they run out of energy.

I think you need to appreciate that they are doing the job that they have been employed to do.

Luxell934 · 16/07/2023 19:35

I think I'm going to raise a complaint as they say no evidence of distress.

Oh please, you want to raise a complaint? About them doing their job? Maybe they were right, maybe they were wrong. They raised the issue, you explained your situation. End of story.

AmITooOldToDoThis · 16/07/2023 19:35

Isn’t there a risk of secondary drowning?

nocoolnamesleft · 16/07/2023 19:37

Would you prefer them not to do anything about a 2 year old they think may be at risk of coming to harm?

IHopeYouStepOnALegPiece · 16/07/2023 19:37

Fuming? Seriously?

Someone expressed some concerns, nothing was wrong. That was the end of it.

Save your fuming for something vaguely worthwhile

2thumbs · 16/07/2023 19:37

You’re “beyond livid” that someone was concerned about the safety of your child in a potentially dangerous setting? That seems a little disproportionate to me

WhenIWasAFieldMyself · 16/07/2023 19:37

So you're disgusted that trained professionals are concerned you're perhaps not being as vigilant with your child as you should be.
I'd be embarrassed rather than livid.

Luxell934 · 16/07/2023 19:38

WhenIWasAFieldMyself · 16/07/2023 19:37

So you're disgusted that trained professionals are concerned you're perhaps not being as vigilant with your child as you should be.
I'd be embarrassed rather than livid.

This.

& how did you know neither of them had kids OP? and if they had kids would that have made a difference to you?

Mum2jenny · 16/07/2023 19:41

If you are in the water with your child and you and the swimming instructor have no concerns, I agree that the lifeguard was a bit excessive. However I’m not sure it’s worth raising an official complaint about it.

OhSmitty · 16/07/2023 19:42

This must be a fake post surely. Swimming lessons at 8 weeks?? 😂