Workmate being really mean because I'm going on holiday and she isn't.

[MojacarSunset]

I'm going on a family holiday to Spain next week with dh and 2 dc. My workmate has been making digs at me for weeks every time anyone mentions the holiday, I'm not talking about it but it comes up naturally when planning meetings/work etc as someone will ask when I'm off, that kind of thing. Every time she has a dig, "It's alright for some" "I wish I could afford a holiday" "Oh yes, your going on holiday"............it's driving me nuts and I'm biting my tongue!!!
Workmate works more hours than me and has 1 child who her mother looks after for free, we pay for childcare before/after school for 2 children!
Our husbands work in the same service and are on the same level, their combined income will be a bit more than ours as I work fewer hours.
The only reason we can afford our 2-week self-catering in Spain is because I budget carefully. Weekly shopping is £100 for everything, we don't have takeaways unless it's a birthday or special occasion, me and DH both take food to work and don't tend to buy fancy coffee and snacks.
I don't moan when she turns up in a new car or bangs on about the latest fancy meal she has had. I'm happy with my choices but she is driving me nuts!!!!

Our holiday is costing us the equivalent of £50 a week, she probably spends that on coffee and lunch!!!

I would say back " well we choose to save our money for a nice holiday, you choose to spend yours on coffees and lunches, we are all different".

When DD was little I used to go away several times a year, always cheap caravan park type holidays, 3 or 4 nights, often through newspaper promotions.

Somebody was always saying to me "oh you are always going away, I wish I could afford to go away as much as you do". I finally said to them, "so how much did your All Inclusive fortnight in Turkey cost you? " They said "ooh around £3K."

So my reply? "blimey, I wish I could afford to do that, I spend around £500 in total on booking all my various weekends away!" (and took my own food, took advantage of the holiday park entertainment so no extra costs).

They never commented again, once they realised that they were spending 6 times what I was.

Play the game back! yes, we are off on holiday. Can't wait to relax have cocktails etc. oh yeah, it cost a bomb but Yolo and all that. You just reminded me My holiday bikini is arriving today and so on make sure she knows you are looking forward and not struggling one bit.

I work to live. I take excessively luxurious (not sure that’s the right word) holidays for extended periods of time (for instance 5 weeks in Florida with an added Bahamian cruise) and frankly, it’s no one else’s business but my own - so for a start, stop justifying what you have chosen to do with your hard earned money.

Next, ignore her. You’ll be away soon enjoying the sunshine and if you are stopping to think about what your colleague has said or is saying, then you’re holidaying all wrong.

Enjoy the build up to your vacation, then have a great time.

I'm the same as you, prioritise my holidays. Every evening I go for the bargains at our local shop and that's tomorrow's sandwiches and tea. Don't smoke, drink v little, old car etc etc

Yet we had this from a couple who both smoke and drink heavily. I'd imagine that's what is taking all their spare cash, cigarettes are mega expensive nowadays. As is drinking when out and about.

I wish I had the nerve to go with some of your suggested responses!
If you're not going to let her know its bothering you then you'll have to just keep putting up with it🤷‍♀️

Tell her the jealousy is REALLY unattractive and leave it there. Have a great holiday x

A guy in my job is a bit like this.
He has no passport, the arse is falling out of all of his jeans, he goes nowhere, he spends a large portion of his money on weed and acts like such a victim when other people go on holiday.

One day I was talking about the price difference between two destinations, I said something like "if youd spend €100 per day in X place , youd spend €50 per day in Y" and he scoffed and said "Yeah right, who has 100 per day to spend??!"
Eh people who save up and are smart with their fuckin money.

What a moany, jealous bastard.
I'm taking great pleasure in letting him know my big holiday this year is 18 nights.

Some shit advice on this thread.

Just blank her and say nothing. She's looking for a reaction.

I don't moan when she turns up in a new car or bangs on about the latest fancy meal she has had

You could always start doing that. She's game for moaning about your spending, so she can hardly object when you turn it back on her.

I would have said something by now I'm afraid. Something like: well if you budgeted your money more carefully maybe you could afford a holiday.
Or alternatively: mind your own business and stop acting like a jealous 10 year old 🤣

Every time she says something respond with 'I know, I'm so excited, can't wait for two weeks in the sun with my family'

I have a colleague like this. I bought a decent day bag for work (think Cambridge satchel) and she went on and on and on about it. We're on the same salary. I just don't spend between 5 and 10 quid a day on coffee and takeaway lunch and I budgeted to have a treat! Just ignore and enjoy your holiday is all you can do.

Every time she says something respond with 'I know, I'm so excited, can't wait for two weeks in the sun with my family'

This is the best way to go. Because it's true.

This annoys me too!
I like going on holiday
Love expensive shoes, bags, clothing and jewellery
However I drive a 10 year old car, buy many things second hand, don’t have takeaways or things like Netflix or expensive phone packages
my choice - I don’t criticise their choices but I still get ‘it’s alright for some’

I don't see why people are so bothered by what other people say that they're rushing to suggest smart arse responses.

I love Mojacar. I've been many, many times as family used to live nearby. We used to go for breakfast on the beach at Dolce Vita (tostadas) and then shopping in Mercadona supermarket, which has the most fabulous perfumes and beauty products. I recommend both!
Unfortunately they moved back to Essex.

Don't wait and then explode. Ask her if she'd like some tips on budgeting so she can save for a holiday. Or retaliate with I wish I had a big new car.

Well you're not the only person going on holiday this year! You shouldn't avoid talking about it with other people if you want to, it's her problem.

Send her a feckin post card when you are there.

My BIL is the same. Buys breakfast and lunch and coffees everyday. They have takeaway several nights a week. Go on really really expensive nights away. Has a sports car that he doesn’t need. Never drives it.
Complains he can’t afford proper holidays.

Weekly shopping is £100 for everything

Genuine question/favour please.
I need to save and cut down.
Is there any chance you could post or PM me your shopping list/food plan.
Massive thanks in advance x

I think you both have too many opinions on what the other spends their money on tbh.

you could try pointing out that envy is admiration gone rotten.

😁

Just roll your eyes and say 'yes, you have mentioned' and walk off looking bored.

A breezy "well I guess we all choose to spend our money on different things" whilst side-eyeing her new car should be enough without exploding...