To wish my relative would stop harping on about portion sizes

[Averagesizedsalad]

I have a relative who is doing my head in with their repeated "Oh I'm so teeny tiny, oh this is so much food however will i manage" dramas. I need to rant before I explode! Share with me your infuriating virtue signalling teeny tiny stories? Maybe I am just extra cranky because I am HUNGRY everytime I see them because I'm breastfeeding 🤷‍♀️

Said relatives recent examples:

• When served a totally average sized salad for lunch, lamented "Oh this is so large, however will I have room for dinner later? I shall have to skip dinner, this salad will keep me full until morning" (I WISH I was joking, but alas I am not)

• Recently cooked a meal of pasta for lunch, in which I could count the number of pasta pieces on one hand. Of course accompanied by "Oh what a large meal, I shan't want dinner later at all!" It equated to about 1 normal sized portion of pasta dish split between 2 people, so fair enough that might be considered a light lunch if you're expecting a big dinner later, but not so much food that you wouldn't need to eat later on!

• Lamented that after having a normal sized slice of cake at a party that they were "Being sooooo naughty and would need to go on a big diet afterwards". It's a single slice of cake at a birthday party for goodness sake! You're not eating 1/4 of a cake everyday for dessert!

Obligatory: relative doesn't suffer from any health issues that might result in a small appetite blah blah blah. They are just insufferable and enjoy attention.

Thanks for listening to a hungry lactating mother complain after having about 10 curls (pieces? Squirls? What is the correct term here??) of pasta for "Lunch"

This made me laugh!!! Thank you x

Oh yes, this was peak Mumsnet. Most people were sensible, but those siding against the OP really went for it. The language around a simple portion of fish and chips was ridiculous. “Eeew, so greasy! So heavy! So stodgy! I would have had to nibble on a lettuce leaf in another room far away from all the overpowering odours, or I’d have been SICK!”

And then as now, the number of people who couldn't or wouldn't understand that it wasn't about not eating much, it was about making a performative show of not eating much. God, they couldn't get it.

This doesn't happen in places where food is scarce.

Exactly that @DrSbaitso 👏

My mother reckoned the days of rationing were the best and she was a child then. Dead now though.

Well, in that case, MIL must have been being sarcastic.