Teacher gifts - ungrateful shit!

[Hufflemuff]

More of a rant than a question to be fair!

I was listening to Heart radio this morning and they had a teacher on called "Mc Grammer" (a rapping teacher - cringe) who was discussing teacher gifts and "what not to buy"...

He said one of the worse gifts he ever got from a student was a Rock - because the pupil said "he rocked" (aww) and some Doritos because that was the pupils favourite crisps (bless). He also said mugs were mostly an unwanted present "there's only so many cups of tea you can drink" apparently.

He said in the past he's gotten an Arsenal shirt, Nando's gift sets and gift cards... He said you should get to know the teacher to find out what they like and buy them something personal to them.

AIBU to be totally pissed off by this mans arrogance. It was totally tone deaf during the middle of a cost of living crisis to suggest parents buy gift cards (the minimum of which is usually £10) and other expensive presents in order for it to be considered a worthwhile gift. The fact he poo-pooed that boys rock as "one of the worse" gifts, which admittedly you wouldn't put on your mantel piece but the sentiment was there. He didn't consider that the boys parents might not have the money to buy a 'real' gift but he still wanted to give him something.

Ah!!! I was so very cross. It was the expectation to get something as a certainty and even then, he might not have been satisfied with it.

I have teachers in the family and they are always happy to get anything at all, no matter what it is. I think he was a really bad representation of all those caring teachers and Heart did the profession a real disservice by having him on.

Rant over! Gah!

@Startyabastard

Def not fake. He wrote the WBD song a few years ago.

k*

Tbf in secondary at least you don’t get much of a sense of reward unless a parent or child tells you they’ve got something out of your lessons. If you teach a core subject at GCSE you do get those lovely moments where someone understands something they’ve been struggling with for a while, or admits something is interesting, but mostly you are dragging teenagers who don’t want to be there through a subject they haven’t chosen while you desperately try to make it fun. It can be difficult to find that rewarding - which is why when someone does tell you that you’ve done something right you really appreciate it.

That’s awful. My favourite ever gift has been a shell that a child gave me on the last day of term. I had supported him as a teaching assistant for two years and he was going to a new school. He had additional needs and rarely showed emotion. He pushed the shell into my hand as he left and said thank you. His mum said he had spent the whole day looking for the right shell on beach. That was 15 years ago and I still have it. We have moved three times and it’s always come with us and been placed into bathroom.

Aww that's horrible!!

That's amazing!!! You must have been a fabulous teacher!

Another child made me a bookmark with the names of all the books and topics we’d studied this year. Really cute and I liked it a lot.

That's a bloody lovely story.

I only want cards. I got the most fabulous one this year. It said Merci and had a French poodle on the front and the student wrote about how much he enjoyed his lessons with me and that he was going to do A level because of me. All in French, of course!

It's up to the schools to put a stop to the gift buying. It should be the same as hospitals where personal gifts are not accepted.

We sent a card and some chocolates, biscuits and choc small cake for them to have in staff room (small school about 10 staff)

Thats horrendous. I’ve put a message on my class page to ask for no gifts, it’s not necessary and I’d much rather a parent verbally just said thank you if they have time/even want to!

Really!? I'm a teaching assistant and whatever we get is most appreciated. We don't expect anything and a message is sent out to say not to bother with gifts. I think it's awful that this Mc Gramma was presumptuous and expects gifts!!

Most teachers I know are sick to the back teeth of end of term gifts. A nice handwritten card from the kid is usually sufficient if you can be arsed.
I did gift 6 wine bottles to the staff room at my child's 'special' residential school when he left though. 'Challenging behaviour' drives many to drink!

Teacher here and I hate this entitled attitude! We are paid to do a job. We are not entitled to gifts. Yes, it is tricky getting too many mugs but just pass them on.

I dislike heavy hints about which drinks, perfumes, expensive jewellery people like and I hate the bragging, grabby SM posts about present hauls. Gggrrr.

Our charity shop used to be full of teacher gifts in September like mugs and thank you teacher ornaments. Never any wine or chocs though.

Personally I go all out for my DCs teachers gifts and always have. Anyone who looks after my DCs for six hours a day and treats them well deserves a good share of my thought and generosity. I buy things if and when I see them and stick them in a cupboard. Christmas and the end of term they get a goody bag. I don’t ever begrudge them…they are responsible for the most important people in my life. Mumsnet threads such as ‘what was your last splurge?’, ‘what is your biggest indulgence?’ etc are a great source of inspiration 😂

Just a card is nice, I was a teaching assistant many years ago and was thrilled to get anything. It wasn't expected.

I think that in state schools then SLT should take the lead and ask parents not to buy gifts at all. Say that letters/cards/drawings are fine but parents shouldn't be spending money on gifts.

What a dick. We are not all like this and I love a good mug!! I can't get enough of them. I am always grateful for any gift or card and treasure them. I've had handmade pencil cases, candles, handmade jewellery and a clay figurine and I've loved them. My favorite present was a child who said her mummy couldn't afford to get me a gift so she made me an acrostic poem. I still have it. By far the best thing I ever got.

Since when did this gift thing start then ?

Never had it when i was at school , sounds like a marketing exercise to sell more useless tatt

I once got hounded off nethuns for saying that I had regifted some stuff children had given me and that I had given some to charity shops. I have kept every single card any child or family has given me but there were so many things I got gifted that I wouldn't ever use.

Apparently I was meant to keep them forever. I ofcourse thank families/children but I don't need 30 boxes of chocolate. And at this time I was in and out schools a few times a year so was getting gifts each time I left. I don't see the problem.with regifting/passing on when unable to use yourself. I'm always grateful for anything but it isn't necessary. A card is much appreciated though.

I don't do teacher gifts as a rule.maybe a chocolate orange at Christmas.

I will this year as my son is a Y6 leaver and his teacher and TA have been exceptionally fantastic with him this year. It'll be a box of chocs and a crocheted bookmark each, with a card.

Whilst this guys comments sound grabby for the pricy stuff and dismissive of the cheap heartfelt gifts, I can see his point about mugs. It's a nice mug to you, but potentially 30 of the bloody things a year to a teacher.

I used to get a £5 Costa voucher and I got so many teachers saying thank you and what a good idea and they was gonna do the same for their children’s teachers. I don’t want to spend more than £5 if I’m honest. One year my daughter had recently been learning about Africa so I paid £10 for a voucher for school supplies for children in poor countries which I hope the teacher appreciated more than a best teacher mug. I hate waste and buying things for the sake of buying something…when I was a kid we never brought presents I don’t quite understand it🤷‍♀️ its a blessing when they go to secondary school and you don’t have to do all this….but actually the teachers that teach teens probably deserve it more🫣

I should add the school often compile an Amazon wishlist and say if anyone wants to buy a present, to pick something from that. I've done that a few times. I haven't seen anything this year though.

I have always taught 16 + (6th form and degree level) and the instance of physical gifting is far lower. Those gifts that I have had I have been so touched by; at that age they rarely come from the parent but from the student. My favourite 3 for some time were all related to a set text that I taught - I received, in different years, a hand-drawn picture, a stone wall plaque and a mars bar! They were so incredibley thoughtful and I treasure them. A gift that brought tears to my eyes was a pharmacy poetry anthology which I still use to get me through dark times. Having said this, a thank you at the end of the year has always been a huge thing for me.