Just realising my friends think wearing glasses is 'lesser' and now I feel like shit

[Speczy]

As the title suggests, I wear glasses. Can't go about my daily life without them. I do have contact lenses but I rarely wear them now.

A friend, older than me by 6 years, needs readers. For small print, nothing major. She is 51 for context. Put it in our chat group (with one other v close friend who is only 40).

The whole narrative was that glasses are an old person thing, how would I wear them? Do I need a lanyard to carry them? Goodness, what kind of bag can I fit them in? Where will I put them? I'll need to wear them at work!! Shocked, glasses, what an inconvenience and a nightmare! Etc.

This was a back and forth between my friends on the group chat. I've been wearing glasses for decades...aibu to be hurt by this? I'm a big, tough grown up, but feel like shit after reading that.

I hate my eyesight and hate my glasses

I cant stand having something on my face all the time for one thing

They steam up, slip down, get dirty, they're wonky because my ears are wonky, its not a good look

Im very very very short sighted and now am long sighted too

But because I cant get on with varifocals, Im in a position where half the time I have take my glasses off (up in the hair, hair gets all tangled in them) to put things right to my nose to read them, this is also not a good look.

I do have contact lenses for sometimes but my eyes get a bit dry,, but then I have to put 'my readers' on, and normally Ive either forgotton them in a different handbag somewhere, so cant read anything written. Wearing 'readers' makes me feel really really old.

Wearing glasses is a bloody nuisance, I hate it

I wear glasses all the time, DD (16) wears glasses all the time, DS is meant to wears glass's all the time, DH has readers.

I think its easier to wear them all the time tbh. Putting them on/taking them off, forgetting where you left them etc . The person who can't find them/doesn't know where they are despite having about 5 pairs in the house ? DH. I know where mine are thanks, I'm wearing them!

Because if you are only long sighted you don't need varifocals!!

I can read fine without glasses, am doing now, but I can't read in my distance glasses so I have varifocals.

I said it's not limited to over-50's. Loads of younger people wear glasses and it's weird to be so derogatory about glasses when 60-70% of people need them.

You're missing my point. You said Reading glasses are incredibly annoying for a lot of people, in a way that regular glasses aren't. Both a friend and MIL recently got them, and they are both being driven batty by the constant on-off, on-off, and misplacing them all the time .

If people really think it is better to wear glasses full time than to be taking them on and off, they can get varifocals, as I've said, without correction for distance, and leave them on all the time.

Your point is stupid! Why would anyone wear glasses with no prescription all the time when they don't need to 😆
the inconvenience of taking reading glasses on and off is less annoying than wearing glasses all the time that you don't need 🙄

You were the one who said Reading glasses are incredibly annoying for a lot of people, in a way that regular glasses aren't - not me!

I wear contacts a fair amount now but I remember growing up glasses were trendy and people would wear them without bloody lenses in which was good for me as no one gave me any troubke. @4 eyes are better than 2 and all that.

No I wasn't 😆 you aren't quoting me

It’s because she’ll have to take them on and off all the time (reading glasses, which come with age). I can see why that would be annoying. You wear yours all the time so no issue. I do to. I would have just said ‘hey you do know I wear glasses!? 😄 how rude’ etc in a jokey way, if I really felt I needed to say something.

I've worn glasses all the time for the last 45 years. A couple of years ago, I was completely horrified when the optician suggested varifocals, because varifocals are for old people, don't you know. Was very depressing being confronted with my natural aging process.

Of course, I eventually got some varifocals and now think they're the best thing ever. (And now other bits of me are falling apart so I have other "oh bugger, I'm getting old" issues to fixate on).

Apologies - I was refuting the point made by the poster I was quoting.

Just post " Glad you you have always thought i was ancient" they will soon wind their necks in after realising they have been rude. They are probably so used to seeing you they forget you wear them but i really did think that attitude went out with the ark.

I've worn glasses for decades as short sighted. I think reading glasses could be more of a faff as you tend to take them on and off and more likely to misplace them.

Is this a thread from the days of 'boys don't make passes at girls that wear glasses'. No it's not.

I'm only really repeating what others have said but age related short-sightedness is such a visible (ha!) sign that your body is starting to let you down! My DH and DM wear glasses all the time and I definitely don't have any negative opinions on them but hate the fact that I started needing them in the last couple of years.

It's also the faff so can't drive in them, can't walk around but will almost certainly need them for at least one label in the supermarket. Need to remember them if I go out as can't read menus but don't need them for the rest of the night. Need them to read in bed but have to remember if I've put them down or on my head if I go to the loo! Cooking is awful - can't read labels or recipes without them but can't chop or walk round the kitchen with them. Constantly putting them down and losing them only enhances the feeling of the descent into old age!

If I’m out for the day (and definitely when I go away overnight) and wear my lenses, I have to take reading glasses, and it’s so annoying to have to wear them in addition to contact lenses. Then I take sunglasses. Sometimes I take my normal glasses as my lenses can annoy me. So I might also take prescription sunglasses. So I might have five pairs of glasses in my bag.

Yeah, after 45 years of wearing glasses they are annoying, reading glasses most of all because of the extra on-off faff and unavoidable sign of getting older!

Who says they arent thankful? I am. I feel very blessed to only need glasses now in my 40s but that doesnt mean I am not allowed to feel sad at the loss of my eyesight due to aging. Thats completely normal- lots of people feel sad when things change as they get older, doesnt mean they arent grateful for the years when they were young

I feel for you OP. This thread disappointed me as a life long spekkie wearer. I’ve now seen comments I haven’t thought about in years. 😥It’s made me have a rethink about people I know who have literally restricted their lives by their refusal to wear glasses. I might have to wear hearing aids soon-I’d rather that than close my world view down with vanity. As to laser treatment-my young adult son had it done as soon as he could afford it. It was successful, but I know others where it had damaged their eyesight even more and many people can’t have it done for medical or financial reasons.I agree with the poster that mentioned failure to embrace change is the more aging.

fellow glasses wearer here since my early twenties (as were both of my parents btw).

I was rather excited about needing them! I looked awesome in mine and felt like they were a new accessory to play with. They were also simply something adults just wore in my family…

your friend probably feels different. Seems to me as if these glasses are a sign (to her) of her body having deteriorated due to age. They basically make her feel old!
and she needed a place to talk about it.
not unlike some people wanting to complain about their first grey hair…

I've worn glasses since I was six but a couple of years ago found myself doing the "manual zoom" thing to read small print and realised I needed varifocals, to my horror. Coming to terms with the effects of aging is usually unwelcome!

I love my glasses,they hide my baggy,blood shot eyes.

It is shocking to have age related eyesight loss when you’ve always had perfect vision. It certainly does make you feel old.

Nah you're being daft. I've worn glasses all my life but took grave offence at being told I now need varifocals.

Partly because she pronounced it 'varry focals' but also because I'm not old (I am).

My face is now glasses shaped. I got contact lenses in a fit of lockdown madness and I looked like a lost baby rabbit. Be grateful for the structure your glasses give your face, they're disguising a multitude.