To not give pocket money??

[hecktoe]

2 DCs 14 and 17. Oldest has a weekend job and uses money to buy clothes, fund his socialising.
I give them £18 each a week for lunches. I buy any clothes they need and they generally don't go without. I expect them to do their share about the house to help... tidy bedrooms, load/empty washer, set table, etc.
14 year old complaining that he wants paid for these tasks but I refuse to, my point being that he needs to contribute to the family running of the house. I have offered to pay him for other jobs -wash car etc but he's less than keen!! His point is that he has no money to do anything because I don't give pocket money. AIBU?

Doing what @XelaM? Anyway that's a separate issue.

This. My 6 year olds get pocket money.

If he wants to go out with his friends, do you give him money for that? Cinema? Trip to town? Fair? Whatever else teenagers do these days 😂

😂

I don't think there's any right or wrong here. I was never given pocket money growing up but had to do chores. My mum never had a lot of money though so I understood. If I asked for money to go out with my friends, I was always with one with a small note or change whilst my friends always had much more.

Now my eldest is a teen and wants to do anything, I offer him money and he'll only ever take half of it because he 'doesn't want to take my money' which is actually really sweet. I just never wanted him to be the kid counting his pennies when out with his friends. Whatever he wants he can have. But he's very respectful and kind pretty much always so I have no problem with this. His only chore is to keep his own room tidy and ad hoc things like empty the dishwasher when I really cba.

My point is, it's really up to you but remember he's just a kid and being the kid with no money sucks big time.

Paper rounds are absolutely still a thing! My 18-year-olds had a round each from age 14-16, and earnt a non-shabby £15 a week or so each (plus very generous Christmas tips). They were officially classed as ' key workers' during COVID, too. They now both work at the co-op.

They had 15 quid a month pocket money from us, too; which increased to 35 when they started 6th form (to cover a fiver a week for a non packed lunch), and 50 a month when they started driving, rather than taking the bus, to school (as we were saving on the bus fare).

I’m loving all the ‘get them to get a paper round’ suggestions! How to show you have zero knowledge of kids / the world today!

🤣🤣

Yes of course, as I've said he doesn't go without.

Two newsagents , locally have stopped paper rounds due to people not reading newspapers and to people getting their own , cheaper, subscriptions.

Well, I know my kids to be fair.

By all means, OP, don't give your children pocket money.
It's your choice.

Just don't expect them to come home, whilst they're at uni as they'll be too busy working in order to supplement their meagre student loan.

Enjoy!

@hecktoe sorry, I didn't know if that just meant clothes / toiletries etc.
if that's the case and he gets money to go out with his friends - surely that is his pocket money?

Tell him you'll stop giving him money for those occasions and instead give him a set amount each month that he budgets for?

Our teens get £80 a month. I always had pocket money from a young age and it wasn't chore related.

I don't know why you wouldn't if you can afford it.

Paper rounds are rare as hens teeth these days. There is only one shop that does it (on foot) near us and they're fully stafffed with backups on hand.

😲you must have some pretty rich relatives then. My dd 16 gets about 50 quid at birthdays.

Managing their own money is a life lesson best learned when they are safe at home: learning how to make it last, save up for things they want, the consequences of frittering it away etc. They won’t learn how to manage a budget/income if they aren’t allowed a regular amount of money and some freedom to manage it themselves. University or first job is too late for that important skill development.

Well, isn't that just the same thing as giving him pocket money? Except that he doesn't learn how to budget?

Ah. You basically operate the same way I do then. The only difference is that I give them a nominal amount of cash to save or spend as they see fit.

I don't think you are miserable, btw. You are making sure they don't miss out by getting money for treats as and when. It's not that different from £50 approx. pocket money per month.

Seriously. Sounds like you're living under a rock.

Mine are young adults now but they both did paper rounds from 13 until they could get better paid work. Local papers still get delivered as do papers from the newsagents. Customers are mostly older people but there's still loads of them about, last time I checked. This paid about £40/month so about the levels of pocket money quoted here.

Like the OP we never gave pocket money, despite us being relatively well off. It's interesting the opinions here but personally, I don't think you truly understand the value of money until you exchange sweat and energy for an hourly rate. Both their work ethic and money management is excellent.

@hecktoe My youngest hated her paper round so got a job in a restaurant at 14. It's possible but takes some resilience to find one that will let children of that age work. It all character building though. They're limited to certain tasks and hours but it's perfectly legal and with tips, she was streaks ahead of her peers financially and also in terms of work experience/soft skills.

£10 a week for a 6yo is equally nuts IMO!

We give age per month at the moment but it will go up once they are teens.

I think you're making the mistake of looking at your immediate vicinity and thinking the rest of the country is the same.

Local papers still get delivered as do papers from the newsagents.

Not here they don’t. The local paper’s online only and there are no newsagents left.

Not here they don’t. The local paper’s online only and there are no newsagents left.*

Gosh. It's almost like places are sometimes... different!

Newsflash. Where you live doesn't represent life around the UK.

Besides, papers aren't the only avenue for kids to earn money. Kids just need to be keen to look, which in itself is a valuable life skill to develop at a young age.

I don't give mine pocket money either OP. My eldest is 16. I do pay for school lunches because she can't be bothered to make packed lunches and complained about everything I packed. I pay for her phone contract. If she is going out with friends I often give her a fiver or tenner to get lunch or pay for bus fair. She's never had to miss out on something because she has no money. But she isn't money motivated and I can't afford pocket money just for the sake of it, and if I offered an allowance and expected her to buy clothes and toiletries etc with it, she would blow it on crap.