to ask what's rudest/most bizarre wedding behaviour you've known of?

[PinkStarAtNight]

Lighthearted thread, inspired by the mention of wedding politics on another thread...just interested to know if anyone out there has experienced/known of any weddings/wedding related behaviour more bizarre/rude than the one I know of. Wedding guest behaviour, bride/groom behaviour and weddings that were just bizarre in general all welcome...

So, I'll start:
Couple getting married were on a very low budget (so much so that their centrepiece wedding cake was actually just cardboard with icing and decorations over it) but they still wanted a 'nice/fancy' wedding with sit down meal and servers...so they hired a town hall for an 'afternoon tea' luncheon type thing just after the wedding, with only close friends and family invited. They then asked other, less close, friends to 'have the privilege' of serving them at this 'high tea' event, free of charge, as a favour, instead of an invite to the wedding (not even the evening party that came later).
It was actually phrased as 'would you like to have the privilege of serving us at our wedding?' and people who were asked were very much expected to see it as an honour. Apparently it's somewhat of the 'done thing' in their circle.

These friends/servers were given waiter/waitress uniforms to wear. Just another reminder- they were NOT being paid. One of the people asked to do it was a friend of mine. She actually thought she was quite close to the family, had known them years and been round for dinner and things like that, but realised they obviously didn't see her that way when instead of a proper invite to the wedding she was asked to do this.

She said that she accidentally split tea whilst pouring it out for someone at this 'luncheon' (I mean its not like she was a professional server!) and the bride's father snapped at her. Everyone at the table treated her exactly like a professional server, not making wye contact, not even thanking her, barking orders at her etc, even though she had known all of them for years and spent time at their house for gatherings...all the servers were 'thanked' a few weeks after the wedding with a box of basic Cadbury chocolates, the type that cost about £5 from Tesco. These boxes of chocolates were elaborately wrapped up and sent with thank you cards. Once opening the box, my friend realised they were all white...looked at the sell by date and they were years out!! 😂

Now, it wasn't really anything to me because I wasn't close to couple (knew them, had mutual friends but never expected to be invited in any capacity) so didn't affect me at all, but I think the whole thing was completely bizarre and such rude and entitled behaviour towards people who were supposed to be their friends. Apparently being asked to dress up in a waitor outfit and take orders/serve people is an immense honour. I didn't, and still don't, have words 😂

Anyone else got anything to top this?

I'm a wedding industry supplier and even I've never seen that level of nonsense

I had two this year that were awful though.

One asked for a quote but didn't specify the service. I quoted her for the standard service we offer, explicitly stating what was included, which she accepted. Turned out she had actually wanted an entirely different service which we didn't offer and hadn't for quite some time, and threatened to post "honest" reviews across the internet if I didn't give her her deposit back.

The other had booked in Jan 2020 for 2021. Due to COVID I let her postpone to 2023, still paying 2021 prices (I didn't see huge inflation coming!). It got to a few weeks before the wedding and I email her to firm up the details and take the balance of payment. Silence. Email again. Silence. Emailed the venue out of desperation and found out she'd cancelled her wedding months prior and hadn't bothered to tell me. I ended up twiddling my thumbs on a prime Saturday in June - she lost her deposit but it was only 20% so lost quite a bit of money.

Crikey, nothing to top that but I did have a friend who arranged herself a massive hen do extravaganza and then offered payment plans to repay her. It cost £1500! For a hen party! Not even abroad!

I once went to a wedding where the bride and groom had fallen out in the run up and weren’t actually talking to each other on the day . They did do the first dance together, to get it out the way I think, but ignored each other the rest of the time. She was with her friends and bridesmaids and he was with his mates and groomsmen . Very awkward , messy break up within a year .

I'm baffled as to why anyone turned up to be a bloody servant?! I'd have laughed and chucked the invite in the bin (after sending it to everyone I knew for a laugh).

I can’t believe anyone actually said yes to that, that’s the most insane story!!!

I guess.. sending an email to all the Osborne's wedding guests? 😬

The one where the father of the bride sat in a corner of the registry office very loudly crying like a child with the snots tripping him and gulping like a fish.

Fifty years later the couple are still together but even till the day he died the father was broken hearted his daughter had made the choice she did. It was all very unhealthy.

Every single wedding I've been to has been utterly lovely, I'm hoping the bad luck isn't being saved up for if/when I get married!

Invited to a wedding in the UK but a flight away. It was then explained that there would not be room for us to eat at the venue (owned by the couple) so about 20 of us were expected to go to the ceremony and then be put on a bus to the nearest town to sort out own food out and then make our way back to the venue for the evening disco. An equal number of more privileged guests were allowed to remain.

Needless to say we declined (as did everyone else with similar invites) and thankfully haven't had much contact since but I did always wonder how they were going to manage rounding us all up to throw us out before dinner, perhaps a bell or a special badge we would wear to mark us out for removal 🤣

Went to a wedding where the Bride had 4 of her best mates lined up to give speeches (mainly about how lovely and amazing she was), but the 4th one… yikes!!!

She basically let it slip that the Bride had been stalking the groom on Facebook and ‘coincidentally’ bumped into him at a house party years after last seeing him. They ‘coincidentally’ liked all the same obscure films and geeky things (that he ‘coincidentally’ had on his Facebook profile).

She and her friends pressured him into proposing including locking him in a room while they performed a dance routine of Beyoncè’s Shoulda Put A Ring On It.

She basically aired all their dirty laundry and how the Bride had strategised to get her man. The speech was so long and cringe and I wouldn’t be surprised if they never spoke again!

Similar thing happened to me. Invited to the morning Church service, kicked out for the meal and then invited back for the evening disco.

Given the logistics that it was in the middle of nowhere and I didn’t have a car, I declined.

What’s bizarre is that people actually agreed to serve!

I went to one years ago where the bride and groom fell out between the wedding and the reception. They didn't speak all evening, didn't even dance together, she booked a last minute extra room at their hotel so they didn't have to sleep together.

The divorce was very soon after that but both are happily married to other people now though.

Hah! I was at a wedding where the bride asked the new girlfriend of the best man to act as a waitress. Apparently the new girlfriend had not been around long enough to be a proper guest and the catering company had indicated they were short staffed....

Poor woman did it too. She was much younger than everyone else and from another country and as i found out did not want to rock the boat by refusing or being affronted. I have come to know her very well as she eventually married the best man who is a good friend of ours. She;s quite lovely.

As I was walking down the aisle, bridal march, one relation plonked their toddler down in front of me. They were about 2 years old, and just wandering aimlessly around the aisle. Dressed up in a little tuxedo.

I guess they thought an impromptu page boy would be super cute.

Someone I know had two of her most loyal friends basically work their butts off as hired help/organisers on the big day. Neither of them got to dress up or sit down and have a proper meal with the rest of us. It was embarrassing but she's always been very indulged so noone said anything.

I went to a family friend's wedding with my Mum, and it was a lovely start. Country church service, followed by reception in a walled garden on a perfect summer day. It was all going so well until we went in for the main meal. The top table had an empty seat with an oversized photo of the grooms Dad on the table in front of it - and they did the speeches first. It was honestly like being at a funeral - complete with photo montage, music... people started crying. It seriously brought the mood down, and it never lifted back up again. The weirdest part was that the Dad had died many years beforehand and the groom had been raised by his stepdad who looked less than impressed too .... when we met the Bride a few weeks after, she was still fuming as she hadn't known it was planned and was supposed to be a "surprise".

Husband's friend from childhood. The friend moved 300 miles away to be with the lady he married but he still kept in contact and we visited them a couple of times a year. The bride was very snobby and often looked down her nose at us.

We visited them when I was newly pregnant and they introduced us to friends of theirs who had also recently found out they were expecting their first. Had a lovely time talking babies with their friend.

Wedding invite arrived while I was still pregnant and it was addressed to husband and me. We were not sure if baby was missed off because he wasn't invited or missed off because he didn't have a name at this point. Husband rang friend to check and the groom said it was a child free wedding but he understood I'd be breastfeeding a two month old baby, so it would be fine to bring the baby as obviously I wouldn't be able to leave him for a weekend away. He said he would check with the bride though and get back to us if the baby wasn't allowed.

Booked hotel room, bought outfits etc. Looked at the wedding present list but it was at an upmarket department store and everything was way out of our price range. I knew they'd bought a house and had started decorating a spare bedroom as a guest room, so I bought bed linen for the spare bed as that wasn't on the list and I thought that would come in useful.

On the day before the wedding, they did an open house with drinks and a buffet for anyone who wanted to drop presents off rather than take them to the actual wedding. We travelled down and arrived at theirs with the present and the baby.

Bride looked horrified when I walked in with the baby and snapped "and why is that here?" The groom coloured up and remembered he had forgotten to ask if the baby was allowed to come so they had a row about that in front of the guests that were already there.

I tried to smooth things over by handing over the present. The bride opened it immediately, exclaimed loudly that the present wasn't on the list and just dumped it on the floor. Groom told her she was rude and they had another argument.

Sat down and was quietly wondering how long we'd have to stay, when the couple who were also pregnant arrived. I smiled and said it was lovely to see her and asked if she had a boy or a girl. Lady went white and ran out of the room in floods of tears with her husband following her.

Groom decided to tell us then that she'd gone into labour and the baby was stillborn. Can't honestly imagine how horrible that must have been for her and there's no way I'd have asked her if I'd known. I still feel really awful about it.

Bride flipped out and said I'd completely ruined her day by bringing the baby, not buying a present off the list and upsetting the other lady. I got banned from the wedding and husband went on his own to support his friend. The friendship fizzled out after that, so we never got to stay in the spare bedroom and I've no idea if she used the bedding or not!

😳
Fucking hell. What a nightmare. I'm surprised your DH still went!!

Not really CF behaviour, but mortifying, was the wedding of a family member. Allegedly, Groom had proposed to Bride, whom he’d been going out with for around six months or so, on the spur of the moment when drunk, and was utterly horrified when Bride and her mum instantly booked a venue, and went into full wedding mode. For reasons to be unfolded below, Groom decided to go through with it.
Day of the wedding came, Best Man was high on drugs so Groom’s dad was co-opted at the last minute as temporary best man. However, original BM insisted on being in charge of playing the sound track during the ceremony. Poor Bride walked down the aisle to about a dozen false starts of her chosen song, all at epically high volume.
After the interminable photos, Groom disappears. Bride seems unruffled but, as everyone is standing around awkwardly, after some heavy hinting realises that the more elderly guests are struggling, and asks that guests go through through to the meal tables. We waited for close on two hours. VERY hacked off catering staff were doing everything they could to preserve the hot buffet.
Bride and Groom eventually appear, Groom looking (to put it politely) unfocused. It becomes obvious during his speech that Groom has emulated his erstwhile Best Man and is as high as a kite. He tells the assembled audience that he is now married and hopes his ex-partner, when she hears this, will regret throwing him out so he had nowhere to live before he met Bride. He dwelt with relish on how he had thrown a brick through ex-partner’s new boyfriend’s window.
Groom’s dad is obviously horrified, and does his best during his speech to patch things up but is interrupted, often, by erstwhile Best Man who also wants to reminisce about some of the things he and Groom used to do. (Mainly involving drugs and criminal damage.) Bride seems oblivious. Buffet, by the time we get to eat it, is inedible.
I believe it got even more unreal later in the evening, but we made our excuses and left. Believe it or not, 18 months later Bride and Groom are still together!

This thread is so funny but I'm also just😯at some these...can't believe these people exist. @YorkshirePuddingsGreatestFan is winning so far for the most rude/bizarre/outrageous story

Inviting people to the ceremony but not the main venue and expecting them to travel, sit through the service, entertain themselves for a few hours, then turn up at the evening party seems quite common on MN but I can't get my head around how people think this is ok!

My sister was invited to the church and evening do of a friend's wedding meaning she would have about 7 hours to entertain herself. She went to the church only.

I went to a wedding where the best man got stoned and it was very obvious during his speech. He also referenced drug taking during the speech. A drug deal took place at the venue and there was a fight. They also chose not to have a band or dj but rather made a cd of their favourite songs played on a loop. (I recognised one song) needless to say no one danced and the atmosphere was awful. The bride was furious mostly at her friends for 'not making more effort' rather than her druggie husband and his friends.

My friend was also fairly young at the time, perhaps now she would tell them where to go! I certainly would.

But I think she also did it because of the way it was put across. It was very much done with the air of asking someone to be your maid of honour...sort of like, 'we'd love it if you would accept the invitation of taking up the privilege of waiting on us at our wedding' - complete with a pause where they expect you to be gushing with gratitude at being given this honourable opportunity. All of the people in this social circle were of the same mind, that it was 'such a privilege' so I think my friend felt that to refuse would be seen as rude and awkward.

I still wonder to this day whether they really truly believed it was a 'privilege' and were simply unhinged (the cardboard wedding cake covered in icing was batshit in itself imo) or whether they knew they were being dicks and put it across in that way to manipulate people into doing it.

My PILs made it clear they had no interest in meeting my DPs before our wedding though my DPs did invite them round.

DPs organised a family get together the night before the wedding but FIL declined to attend and travelled a further hour south to stay with one of his DDs the night before our wedding only meeting my DPs outside the church on the day of our wedding 🙄

Despite all this and my lovely DPs helping with some of the wedding costs, DFIL announced, via DH that he was making a speech. 😡

I was fuming and DH and I had our first marital row but DFIL persisted.
DPs and PILs all long gone as this was 30 years ago but I still remember.

We hadn't seen ils for 7 months before our wedding. Mil decided after a quick coffee with dh he had ordered the wrong outfit and rang the hire shop to try get it changed! Shop rang me and I went nuts. Dh went and uninvited mil. Fil still came but we haven't seen them since back then.. Been married 8 years now..