Page 23 | I've been unfaithful and I don't know how tell DH

Lostsoul0307 · 2023-07-03T10:48:58+00:00

I know I'm going to be absolutely annihilated for this but please believe me when I say I already feel terrible. I was at a friends hen party this weekend at a holiday cottage with a group of about 20, on the Friday night a stripper had been hired and it was way more intimate than I was prepared for, he did a bit with whipped cream and a few of us licked off. I would never usually but I was really quite tipsy, there was a bit of crowd pressure and the whole thing was really quite arousing, I know these are lame excuses. I crossed a line and did stuff for way longer than I should. I know I need to tell DH but I have no idea how to even go about bringing this up, he'll be crushed and I'm so disappointed in myself.

MyTruthIsOut · 03/07/2023 16:03

aperolspritzbasicbitch · 03/07/2023 14:43

Tempted to text my DP and ask if he'd rather I a) suck a already well moistened strippers cock for 3-4 minutes, or b) scratch the car.

😂😂😂😂😂😂

We should all do it 😂

ShirleyPhallus · 03/07/2023 16:05

Nordicrain · 03/07/2023 16:03

How does a cheek kiss turn into a snog? Unless you were crying to open mouth lick his cheek?

Show quote history

Yeah this seems like an absolutely case of chinny reckon to me too

Juanmartinez · 03/07/2023 16:07

A difficult situation was sprung on you.
Everyone would have been so drunk no one would have noticed how long you were behind the flag

How was it sprung on her , it's not as if she was standing minding her own business and his penis just fell into her mouth.
And I don't believe for one minute it went unnoticed.

CaptainSeven · 03/07/2023 16:11

@Nordicrain both of us were very drunk.

I went to give a granny type kiss on the cheeks. You know where you purse your lips together?

Anyway he turned his head so that turned into a lip to lip kiss

Then I was so drunk I don't remember what happened next but I do remember pushing him away saying I need to catch a train to get home to my DH!

He was also so drunk he doesn't remember how it started.

It didn't last long (as I was rushing for the train)

For me honesty was the best policy and I drunkenly explained it to my DH as soon as I saw him.

Incidentally when I was about 8 in primary school playing kiss,cuddle, torture I went to kiss the boy I'd caught on the cheek and he DID THE SAME THING! Turned his head so was a lip smack kiss rather than a cheek kiss.

PrideNails · 03/07/2023 16:13

Lostsoul0307 · 03/07/2023 14:44

Honestly I'm not sure but there is enough support for me to keep quiet and deal with my internal guilt and shame

Show quote history

I'm sorry but you should tell him. He deserves the truth and your relationship deserves honesty and transparency. Trust me, it will be a whole lot worse if he somehow finds out down the road.

Whatkindofuckeryisthis · 03/07/2023 16:13

Lostsoul0307 · 03/07/2023 14:44

Honestly I'm not sure but there is enough support for me to keep quiet and deal with my internal guilt and shame

Show quote history

He deserves to know the mouth he kisses has been noshing off a grubby penis. You’re so wrong.

whumpthereitis · 03/07/2023 16:15

By the sounds of it, it’s unlikely that OP was the only one that woke up mortified this morning. It is quite possible that she also isn’t the only one that has a vested interest in keeping her mouth, erm, shut. Plus it sounds like everyone was quite drunk. If no one actually saw her, and there’s no video or photographic evidence, then she can easily just deny, deny, deny if it does ever get spoken about.

Bookworm20 · 03/07/2023 16:16

A difficult situation was sprung on you.

Hmmmm. Unless he walked up to OP, held her nose until she opened her mouth and then popped it in, I really don't see how the situation was sprung on her. Or difficult.

In all my years I have managed to avoid whipped cream covered cocks falling into my mouth.
Perhaps I've just been lucky and haven't had such difficult situations like this sprung on me.

Libelula21 · 03/07/2023 16:18

Juanmartinez · 03/07/2023 16:07

A difficult situation was sprung on you.
Everyone would have been so drunk no one would have noticed how long you were behind the flag

How was it sprung on her , it's not as if she was standing minding her own business and his penis just fell into her mouth.
And I don't believe for one minute it went unnoticed.

By the sounds of it she was not expecting a stripper to be there. If you’re plied with alcohol all day, perhaps not enough to eat, and surrounded by other raucous women, things can easily develop into a situation you’d have chosen to avoid if you’d had prior notice.

Beneficialchampion2 · 03/07/2023 16:20

If the sexes were reversed there would be an outrage on here.

Oh it's ok I only put the tip in...

Mumsnet is a sexist cesspit of hypocrisy.

You cheated whether you like it or not, live with the guilt forever and the paranoia he may find out through another person or come clean. Only you can make that decision.

Crumpleton · 03/07/2023 16:20

Stupid to let too much alcohol harm your relationship,

That doesn't seem to apply to any threads on MN concerning something a man may do when alcohol is involved, difference is....

It's not the alcohol harming the relationship, its the OP and her ability to control herself from putting a man's cock in her mouth and giving it a wobble.

ThinkTheresBeenAGlitch · 03/07/2023 16:21

FloydPepper · 03/07/2023 15:26

They are very very small in number, vanishingly small when the man has done something like this.

and they get roundly disagreed with

im amazed anyone can’t see how this thread is a clear indication of how skewed mumsnet is!

Show quote history

This thread is a set up - deliberately misleading first post so that all the posters who only read that and then reply are assuming the OP's actions to have been mild hence a number of replies which say it isn't cheating and is ok. A small number saying it's cheating but she shouldn't tell, a tiny number saying it's fine. Most posters correctly calling it out as fiction! And far more condemning it than condoning. Plus the depressing number desperate to jump on it as proof of double standards, the same tedious crowd who always bleat 'what if the genders were reversed' with no basis or understanding who swoop in on the minority answers and crow about it.

The OP's last post about having plenty of support on here confirms their agenda clearly enough! They really haven't even tried to make this convincing.

Whelm · 03/07/2023 16:24

brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr · 03/07/2023 13:23

half expect this to be market research for a new Listerine campaign.

„Had something regrettable in your throat ? Try new Listerine cock-be-gone…“

It took 17 pages, but someone had to allude to gargling. You should be ashamed of yourself.

"Bingo!"

AngeloMysterioso · 03/07/2023 16:24

I would only tell your husband if you are prepared for this to cause him a great deal of pain and/or the end of your marriage.

Get yourself to the GUM clinic pronto, stay away from him til you’ve got the all clear or taken your antibiotics, and for god’s sake keep your mouth shut which is what you should have done on the hen do.

ThinkTheresBeenAGlitch · 03/07/2023 16:26

Beneficialchampion2 · 03/07/2023 16:20

If the sexes were reversed there would be an outrage on here.

Oh it's ok I only put the tip in...

Mumsnet is a sexist cesspit of hypocrisy.

You cheated whether you like it or not, live with the guilt forever and the paranoia he may find out through another person or come clean. Only you can make that decision.

Its not a sexist cesspit of hypocrisy; that would be pretty much every other website on the internet (using the correct definition of sexist).

Some people just really can't stand a popular website existing with a strong female voice, centred around women and challenging misogyny. Some of those people come on here and start ridiculous threads, very much like this one!

If you read the thread, you'll notice that most people don't think this behaviour is ok from a man or a woman. You'll also notice it isn't remotely true.

Prettybutdumb · 03/07/2023 16:30

Lostsoul0307 · 03/07/2023 12:18

Well you have genuinely made me lol

Show quote history

I don’t agree with any level of cheating and yes you messed up, but this is good advice. Keep your mouth shut and laugh it off if any of it comes out. It’s a lesson.

If the other person who knows ever brings it up - act surprised, you never did anything. It’s something you would remember no matter how drunk you were. You remember nothing so it didn’t happen.

Sleepydoor · 03/07/2023 16:32

whumpthereitis · 03/07/2023 14:56

This thread is amazing.

I’m laughing at the amount of posters thinking this can’t possibly be true and must be posted by a man because a woman would never.

There are always people on stripper threads insisting that women go to see male strippers only for a laugh (never because they find it arousing) and that men are never allowed to actually have physical contact with female strippers, despite many stories, videos and pictures proving otherwise. Some people are very good at believing they know how the world works and blocking out anything that contradicts their beliefs.

FloydPepper · 03/07/2023 16:50

ThinkTheresBeenAGlitch · 03/07/2023 16:21

This thread is a set up - deliberately misleading first post so that all the posters who only read that and then reply are assuming the OP's actions to have been mild hence a number of replies which say it isn't cheating and is ok. A small number saying it's cheating but she shouldn't tell, a tiny number saying it's fine. Most posters correctly calling it out as fiction! And far more condemning it than condoning. Plus the depressing number desperate to jump on it as proof of double standards, the same tedious crowd who always bleat 'what if the genders were reversed' with no basis or understanding who swoop in on the minority answers and crow about it.

The OP's last post about having plenty of support on here confirms their agenda clearly enough! They really haven't even tried to make this convincing.

Show quote history

Nah, loads have read everything and still defend it. It may be a set up but it’s like shooting fish in a barrel…

Baystar · 03/07/2023 16:51

If your hubby was going down on a stripper (after 18 others had been there too) at a stag doo would u let it slide?
Gross.

Poppysmom22 · 03/07/2023 16:53

You're telling him to make yourself feel better he gains nothing. Keep it to yourself and let that be your punishment

DrSbaitso · 03/07/2023 16:59

This is still here??

IDontLoveTheWayYouLie · 03/07/2023 17:01

Thank you for everyone's comments, they're hilarious 😂

I actually feel sorry for your husband but hopefully someone else gets their fanny out for him soon x

Motnight · 03/07/2023 17:02

Lostsoul0307 · 03/07/2023 12:07

Honestly not a wind up. I'd actually written aroused but thought it sounded a bit too Hyacinth Bouqet

Show quote history

I must have missed that episode Keeping Up Appearances.

DrSbaitso · 03/07/2023 17:03

Motnight · 03/07/2023 17:02

I must have missed that episode Keeping Up Appearances.

Show quote history

"The Commodore!"

Blondey2023 · 03/07/2023 17:03

To all the posters saying it's no big deal and not to tell her DH... would you think the same way if roles were reversed? I.e Husband goes down on a stripper for 3-4 mins like OP said? That's cheating on his Wife isn't it?

For what it's worth OP I went to a hen do last year and there was a stripper there that got naked and aroused. We drew the line at touching 'it' though, as we are all married or in relationships. I would absolutely come clean to your DH.