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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

To call this an assault?

374 replies

trustyrustie · 27/06/2023 21:21

I was shopping in one of those supermarkets, that isn’t actually a supermarket but sells all the stuff that you know that you don’t know you need until you walk in today. When I finished, I approached the till area. There were a few tills with one woman on one till. the other tills were empty. I joined the queue for the till and there were three or four people ahead of me.

I had a trolley with two items in it, and I was holding the trolley with both hands. At some point the cashier left her position at the till to walk towards the customer services desk and look at two ladies working there. I didn’t realise she had done this until she yelled over aggressively to them “I’m sending some customers down to you because I’ve got plenty of them here” or words to that effect.

Without me expecting it she then aggressively physically pushed my trolley while I still had hold of it with both hands so that it spun 45° to the right in the direction of the customer services desk. My arms were pulled and my body was spun around as it went. She then turned around and went back to her till.

I think this was an assault.

I was shocked and upset… A few people that I know agree with me, and a few don’t

AIBU?

OP posts:
MustYou · 27/06/2023 22:39

Strulch73 · 27/06/2023 22:19

If she pushed the trolley hard so your body was jarred by it then yes I would say this is an assault. If you had been elderly or had a balance problem and were relying on the trolley for stability you could have fallen and fractured a hip. I would be expecting her to be dismissed for such behaviour and I would take my business elsewhere. Rudeness and aggression is not acceptable and people thinking this is ok have a no values.

I agree with this. As usual on here, people are just being contrary as it’s the only thrill they get. If OP had come on here as the shop assistant and said she’d done this, there’d be the same posters saying it was tantamount to assault.

If she’d done this to an elderly or frail person this could have been pretty bad. She shouldn’t have done it to anyone. I imagine the other staff members witnessed it.

Avatartar · 27/06/2023 22:39

Anyone with muscular or bone problems could have been injured quite badly by sudden forceful movements like that! Contact the store, hopefully they’ll have it on cctv. Luckily you weren’t physically harmed but it’s hardly an example of good customer service

MissAmbrosia · 27/06/2023 22:40

What is it that you want to happen? An apology? Cash? For the person to lose their job? Or you could just have a laugh about the poor woman having a bad day and stop being so bloody precious? I don't know how people cope any more.

7eleven · 27/06/2023 22:40

Why does it matter? Naming it doesn’t change anything.

Mari9999 · 27/06/2023 22:40

@trustyrustie
If you think that s crime had been committed report it to the police or seek legal advice. At that point you won't have to guess or poll strangers on the internet.

andasthedaysgoby · 27/06/2023 22:40

Did she push the trolley from the front? I'm struggling to imagine how she could push it from the handle if you were already holding onto it and therefore stood in front of it (in the way of the handle).

WiddlinDiddlin · 27/06/2023 22:42

wutheringkites · 27/06/2023 21:50

Who grips their shopping trolley tightly, with both hands, while standing in a queue?

Me, I did for YEARS, and many other people on their way to becoming wheelchair users, people with chronic illnesses, its very common to use the trolley to lean on.

In my case lumbar stenosis meant leaning forward on something meant I could keep walking much longer than standing upright unsupported.

If someone had shoved the trolley round with me leaning on it, it would have caused me some serious pain and probably muscle strains from being suddenly yanked/jerked, possibly even a fall.

No idea if the OP is over egging this or not - tbh, I don't think it matters. If it were me, I would complain to the store and ask they review CCTV footage, because even if the OP is not disabled, has no hidden conditions etc, the next person this employee does this to may have.

Butchyrestingface · 27/06/2023 22:42

If there’s blame, there’s a claim 😂

If there's blame
there's a claim
if not outright fame
and the opportunity to frame
a grumpy Poundstretcher's dame
whose trolley shoving left me lame
Anyone saying they wouldn't do the same
needs to start playing the game
Abandon your shame
Make compo your aim

*best sung to the tune of 🎵 Good King Wenceslas 🎵

Ellie4747 · 27/06/2023 22:42

It's not assault! I do this for a living.
There was no men's rea aka no intent to cause harm you or cause you to fear of harm, a description of this would be someone raising there fist at you etc she never even said a word to you, Her intent was to guide the trolley and you to another area. She probably didn't realise the strength of the push and was more focused on getting back to the till.

It's was bad service that's all, from what sounds like a very stressed employee, under a stupid workload whilst her colleagues chatted.
Remember staff are human too they have emotions too. People are so quick to complain. I'm sure if you would have said something you would have got an apology.

Confusion101 · 27/06/2023 22:42

heartsinvisiblefury · 27/06/2023 22:24

I'm still not over the OTT description of where you were rather than just naming the place 😀

SAME!!!!! So much needless information.....

And no, it wasn't assault. I also think it's fairly pointless to go back and complain, kinda should have been a "there and then" complaint in my opinion.

clairethewitch70 · 27/06/2023 22:43

My husband and I were physically assaulted and injured. We were shoved and kicked. That is assault. People like you making claims of assault mimimises it for people who have been actually hurt. She moved your trolley. Yes she may have made you jump. But assault? Come on

HalliwellManor · 27/06/2023 22:44

Ellie4747 · 27/06/2023 22:42

It's not assault! I do this for a living.
There was no men's rea aka no intent to cause harm you or cause you to fear of harm, a description of this would be someone raising there fist at you etc she never even said a word to you, Her intent was to guide the trolley and you to another area. She probably didn't realise the strength of the push and was more focused on getting back to the till.

It's was bad service that's all, from what sounds like a very stressed employee, under a stupid workload whilst her colleagues chatted.
Remember staff are human too they have emotions too. People are so quick to complain. I'm sure if you would have said something you would have got an apology.

You push people's trolleys aggressively to a 90degree angle for a living?
Shame on you!!

oakleaffy · 27/06/2023 22:45

Assault would be if she lifted the trolley high and slammed you with it, or rammed you hard with one- merely pushing a trolley 45 degrees?

That's nothing.

Not after ''Compo'' I hope!

Mortgagewoes1 · 27/06/2023 22:45

Christ. Get a grip. Absolutely not assault.

Feraldogmum · 27/06/2023 22:46

❄️

Ellie4747 · 27/06/2023 22:48

HalliwellManor · 27/06/2023 22:44

You push people's trolleys aggressively to a 90degree angle for a living?
Shame on you!!

Show quote history

Hahaha! Brilliant response

Tessabelle74 · 27/06/2023 22:48

Did you have a Vulcan death grip on the handle? Most of us would just be resting our hands on it whilst standing still and it would have just pulled away from us. You're massively over reacting

TheLadyofShalott1 · 27/06/2023 22:48

This reply has been hidden

This reply has been hidden until the MNHQ team can have a look at it.

LaBefana · 27/06/2023 22:50

trustyrustie · 27/06/2023 21:32

Yes, somebody else said to me, it can’t be assault because she didn’t physically put her hands on you which made me think if she’d hit me with a stick would that be any different? Because she hadn’t actually put her hands on me. I was holding a trolley which she spun extremely quickly, and I had no time to react or loosen my grip

Hands on a person isn't necessary to prove assault; intent to hurt or put in fear is. A weapon such as a stick would be an aggravating factor. Summary: pissing you off is not, by itself, 'assault'.

Tessabelle74 · 27/06/2023 22:50

Mari9999 · 27/06/2023 22:40

@trustyrustie
If you think that s crime had been committed report it to the police or seek legal advice. At that point you won't have to guess or poll strangers on the internet.

The police always need bat shit stories like this for the Christmas parties, she's should definitely waste everyone's time ringing them

Yerroblemom1923 · 27/06/2023 22:51

180° would be spinning.
She was clearly having a bad day and took it out on the trolley. Let it go, OP. No harm done really.

Ellie450 · 27/06/2023 22:52

Is anyone else imagining this sound when reading OP’s harrowing story?

Cartoon Running - Sound Effect (HD)

https://youtu.be/NcWwiv0HJow

VK456 · 27/06/2023 22:53

Her action was rude and unnecessary, of course, but it makes for a hilarious thread!

tennesseewhiskey1 · 27/06/2023 22:53

I don’t think it was assault. But I’m curious to see what you want out it/ this thread? If X number of people agree then you go to the press or something? Or?

Brightbear · 27/06/2023 22:53

Mari9999 · 27/06/2023 22:40

@trustyrustie
If you think that s crime had been committed report it to the police or seek legal advice. At that point you won't have to guess or poll strangers on the internet.

This