Is behaviour out of control in a lot of schools?

[Sophie12319]

Not sure whether to move DD (10) to another school. Everyday she's coming home saying she can't learn as there are a group of boys who throw stuff about the classroom, shout out when the teacher is talking, walk about the classroom in lesson. She has said teacher has sent them to headteacher in the past but it carries on.

This is not a teacher bashing thread btw (in fact, I have the upmost respect for DD's teacher as I have seen the boys behaviour at the school gate and I don't know how she does a whole day), maybe more of a parent bashing of why some parents let their kids behave like this?

Anyway, back to the point of thread, I spoke to my sister about moving her to which she said there's no point as he DS' school is the same.
Feel a bit hopeless as I feel DD's education is being ruined! I've emailed the school before about their behaviour but I feel at a loss!

Lack of positive male role models and serial feckless'step fathers' is a major factor in boys behaviour that we are never allowed to talk about as it stigmatises 'single mums'.

The UK is soft as shite and kids know it.

huh? You're not even a teacher and you know how you would feel as both a primary and a secondary school teacher? Really?

Then these boys end up filling the jails.

No father at home (at least not a good one) and few male teachers at school and the ones that are are powerless to actually enforce any discipline.

No it doesnt. He points out how shit these men are.

It's just these children don't care about learning and not do their parents. These children used to be excluded if they were violent or sent to schools if they had special needs.

Just reintroduce setting in school and permit explosions more easily. More children need these to happen for their own education than those who would be excluded.

Also nothing wrong with isolation - use it more and then get problem kids out after a certain stage.

Explusion NOT explosion.

that sounds horrific, it must take its toll on you. This thread has been an eye opener and is utterly depressing! Am reading with interest...

What is this shit? Seriously? Yes, it stigmatises the thousands of single mums out there who are doing the job of the whole fucking village. And the many more who never introduce their children to a single step father let alone a string of feckless ones. Single mums are not some kind of homogenous group with the same shit going on for all of them. And plenty of people in prison raised in middle class households, raised by 2 hardworking parents.

Jesus wept. And wept some more.

Why do schools put up with it? There should be zero tolerance for abuse. People get away with what they're entitled to.

If parents are abusive call the police at least. There has to be a deterrent for bad behaviour, children or adults need boundaries.

Definetly got worse last few years not just in schools but on public transport and town centres. i am glas my daughters have left school now. when my youngest was at school there were a few kids in the class who regulary had meltdowns flipping tables, chairs, ripping up work, nothing was done as they were not allowed to exclude them even when my daughter was assulted by one he was sent home but allowed back in the next day. He got the support but she was left to get on with it! three assaults were not even put in the book. she still has flashbacks,

Yes it has got worse overall than pre Covid.
Even parents are quick to bait the school when the kids break the rules (erm you chose a school for the rules but not when it affects your child or check their rules before you accept the place)?!

however, not all classes are the same.

good luck.

Boys lacking boundaries and discipline (in school and perhaps at home) and lacking positive male role models (at home and perhaps at school) will often have a negative effect on their development and on their behaviour.

They need the boundaries and discipline regardless of their home situation and soft-as-shit schools (and it's the same with the police and courts) don't provide that.

It's typical that 13 years of a Conservative government - that have destroyed everything - couldn't at least be tough on anti-social behaviour.

No father at home

Might have known that some idiot would come along and try to find a contorted and bizarre way to try to blame single mothers for schools failing. 🤣🤦🏻‍♀️

Just a thread full of excuses. I live in Poland. Kids were online due to covid for a lot longer than in the uk. I can tell you now I have never heard of any of the behaviour meantioned here. They do not have cool down rooms just not needed. I ask kids if they are naughty what happens....they get a minus point and mum will be soon angry.
So why do kids here not behave like their English counterparts....parents. I teach some kids privately and if they are a little naughty (not listening ect) a quick do you want me to call your mother is enough to put a stop to any misbaviour.

Huh? I am not a teacher

Just as well. Even now they surely can't be that desperate.

We have at least two primary schools here that have a feral reputation.

It has worsened. When a friend pulled her child from one recently, there were 11 children remaining from an initial class of 30. The HT would not attempt to tackle the behaviour.

Another child (4) returned home from school with bite marks on the back of her neck. The school's response to the parent was "What would you like us to do about it?".

Allegedly, we have 4000 families declared to be home educating in our local authority area.

I am relieved beyond belief that my DD has done her GCSEs this year & will be moving to a college where I assume teenagers actually want to be. I don't blame teachers for leaving, behaviour (in my DD's school (rural, relatively well off demographic) is appalling. And it seems nobody can do a thing about it. Where does it end?

How should schools tackle behaviour? When students are put in isolation and removed from the classroom for being disruptive mumsnet goes mad about human rights, mental health and a right to education.
Our primary is lovely but with one or two massive pains. Not criminal behaviour but searing and bullying. Primary schools do not have the backing of governors or parents to suspend students.
Secondary do. And they do it. Our secondary have a three strikes and you’re in isolation. The isolation room is hard work and staffed by senior teachers so that the general classrooms are calm and focussed. BUT those parents are generally not supportive of behaviour management and defend their kids.
Not sure what the answer is. Maybe a 1984 style control until you can prove you’ll be a decent parent then they’ll let you make babies?

Because the parents are too lazy, thick and indulgent to parent effectively. And those who do parent properly are practically accused of child abuse for the slightest hint of discipline 🙄

Children in this country are treated like little demi gods who absolutely must never be told "no" or upset in any way whatsoever.

In primary we are not allowed minus points - too negative. No sun and cloud chart for names. ‘My child doesn’t want the label of a naughty girl by having her name on the cloud’ even if she will fully destroyed school property. Sun and cloud chart had to go. No names on the board, nothing. We are not allowed to discipline children in any way. I never had any problems with behaviour management but now I have no tools left to use.

How should schools tackle behaviour? When students are put in isolation and removed from the classroom for being disruptive mumsnet goes mad about human rights, mental health and a right to education.

Rights come with responsibilities, and also have to be balanced against the rights of others. If these "students" cannot behave in a way that doesn't damage others' right to an education or not to be subjected to violence and intimidation then they have forfeited their right to be in the classroom and will have to learn the hard way that this damages their education, not those of other students. Zero tolerance: temporary exclusion as a warning and a permanent one afterwards if they re-offend. It won't be tolerated in adult life so it's doing them no favours either to pander to it.

My son is at high school in central Scotland and we have a resident policeman in the school. Shocking

Complain to the school governors

Exclusion is looked upon by LAs and ofsted as the school ‘failing the child’. It is very hard to do and not really a deterrent.