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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DD in shorts

95 replies

ostwest · 22/06/2023 10:01

13yo DD's school has sports' week. As the weather is warm (SE England), she's been wearing shorts to school. This morning DH (her dad) had a go at her for wearing it 'all week' and how short they are- she has 2 pirs, so not been wearing same. I normally berate my DD for wearing her school skirt too short, but this time had to defend her. Yes, the cycling-style cotton shorts ride-up a bit, but I see every other young girl having the same 'problem'. DD had skort, but she hates it and I don't think it's good in this weather as it is synthetic.
AIBU to think it's not 100% ok, but there is no alternative and she can walk to school in 'short' shorts. The shorts come to maybe 1/3 of her thighs.

OP posts:
Beamur · 22/06/2023 10:03

He's being unreasonable.
They're just legs. She's 13 - still a child.
If the school haven't got an issue why has he?

greencheetah · 22/06/2023 10:09

They cover 1/3 of her thighs? I thought you were going to say they were like Daisy Dukes.

Your DH sounds a bit weird.

Malificent1 · 22/06/2023 10:11

Tell your DH to stop commenting on his daughter’s body and wardrobe.

bibbityboppityboo · 22/06/2023 10:12

Sounds like your DH has an issue - does he police your body too?

If the school have no issue with them, your DD is comfortable in them and they're working well for sports week and the heat then what is the issue?

Mrsjayy · 22/06/2023 10:13

It's a pair of legs teenagers sometimes wear short shorts what does her father think will happen while wearing the short shorts ?

Blinkingheckythump · 22/06/2023 10:16

I don't understand why cycling shorts only cover a third of her thighs. Most I see come to above the knees so cover most of the thigh. Is she very tall? Or the shorts too small ? Personally I'd have thought only covering a third of the thigh would be too short for the school rules

Sirzy · 22/06/2023 10:17

I don’t see why there is no alternative? Surely for school uniform you buy appropriate length uniform including the shorts?

Mrsjayy · 22/06/2023 10:19

Blinkingheckythump · 22/06/2023 10:16

I don't understand why cycling shorts only cover a third of her thighs. Most I see come to above the knees so cover most of the thigh. Is she very tall? Or the shorts too small ? Personally I'd have thought only covering a third of the thigh would be too short for the school rules

The new style of cycle shorts are shorter my neighbours teenager wears them.

Opaque11 · 22/06/2023 10:51

Sirzy · 22/06/2023 10:17

I don’t see why there is no alternative? Surely for school uniform you buy appropriate length uniform including the shorts?

Yes this and I'm with your dh.

Original poster
ostwest · 22/06/2023 11:11

Sirzy · 22/06/2023 10:17

I don’t see why there is no alternative? Surely for school uniform you buy appropriate length uniform including the shorts?

The shorts only come to her mid-thigh and then ride up when she walks. She is v tall, but slim, so I have to buy her size 10 shorts.
Regarding her school uniform: she rolls up her 'normal length' school skirt, making it shorter. Apparently, 'everyone does it' at her school 🤷‍♀️

OP posts:
DiscoBeat · 22/06/2023 11:29

I would just worry about pervy old men looking, is the only thing. I sort of get where he's coming from.

ThursdayFreedom · 22/06/2023 11:36

He's shocked she has... legs???

it's not as though she's cut off the bottoms to make them Lycra Daisy Dukes... and even if she had, if the school doesn't have a problem, then so what?

why shouldn't she be wearing them all week if it's sports week and that's what the school are allowing/insisting??

tell him to stop being a knob and strap in for the teenage years.

& yes, most teenage girls wind their shirts up to make them shorter it's hardly a new or unusual thing.

ThursdayFreedom · 22/06/2023 11:37

DiscoBeat · 22/06/2023 11:29

I would just worry about pervy old men looking, is the only thing. I sort of get where he's coming from.

@DiscoBeat

so what if they look? They'll see a couple more inches of LEG.

Boomboxinmyattic · 22/06/2023 11:40

It's a cultural thing in the UK; other countries don't sexualise children in this way.

Mariposista · 22/06/2023 11:41

The whole point of shorts is that they are shorts - she wouldn't be able to do sport in them if they were past her knees. If they are so short you can see her bum cheeks, he has a point, but mid thigh is normal for cycling/running shorts.

Boomboxinmyattic · 22/06/2023 11:42

If your husband looks at his adolescent daughter and just sees her bare thighs I'd trade him in for someone less dodgy.

Mrsjayy · 22/06/2023 11:46

ostwest · 22/06/2023 11:11

The shorts only come to her mid-thigh and then ride up when she walks. She is v tall, but slim, so I have to buy her size 10 shorts.
Regarding her school uniform: she rolls up her 'normal length' school skirt, making it shorter. Apparently, 'everyone does it' at her school 🤷‍♀️

Show quote history

Girls have been shortening school skirts forever I mean its not new ! Teenage girls are wearing crop tops and short shorts like they invented the trend they didn't!

taybert · 22/06/2023 11:48

DiscoBeat · 22/06/2023 11:29

I would just worry about pervy old men looking, is the only thing. I sort of get where he's coming from.

They are legs. Why should she wear something less comfortable and practical just in case a man looks at her legs? And why are we happy to put that responsibility on to girls and to make them moderate what they wear instead of asking grown men to control themselves and not to sexually objectify children?

DownWithBreadsticks · 22/06/2023 12:00

Boomboxinmyattic · 22/06/2023 11:40

It's a cultural thing in the UK; other countries don't sexualise children in this way.

🧐

Young girls are sexualised all over the world. Japanese hentai being the most extreme example. But, let’s not forget “Hit Me Baby One More Time”

That withstanding, OP’s husband is being a bit much about it. Although I would suppose it is coming from a place of concern.

Boomboxinmyattic · 22/06/2023 12:01

DownWithBreadsticks · 22/06/2023 12:00

🧐

Young girls are sexualised all over the world. Japanese hentai being the most extreme example. But, let’s not forget “Hit Me Baby One More Time”

That withstanding, OP’s husband is being a bit much about it. Although I would suppose it is coming from a place of concern.

Show quote history

To a Scandinavian, the whole "sexy school girl" trope is incomprehensible; children's bodies are not sexualised there.

Malificent1 · 22/06/2023 12:06

DiscoBeat · 22/06/2023 11:29

I would just worry about pervy old men looking, is the only thing. I sort of get where he's coming from.

Girls should not have to police their bodies to stop men from looking at them.

PixieLaLa · 22/06/2023 12:08

I don’t think the shorts sound like they are ‘too short’ but I am surprised she’s allowed to wear them at school if they are skin tight it would be like wearing leggings with a top which wouldn’t be very appropriate for school surely

Greengrass123876 · 22/06/2023 12:10

M&S do these as part of their Schoolwear range. My DD (9) has been wearing them in all of this warm weather. They’re totally appropriate for the weather and great for cartwheeling in and running, and everything else a 9 year old (let alone a 13 year old) needs to be doing.

Huge eyeroll at your DH.

TheSandgroper · 22/06/2023 12:11

FGS, don’t let him live in Western Australia. He won’t know where to look. All the State schools have shorts as part of their official uniform policy. They can get extremely short as legs grow.

Butterwouldmelt · 22/06/2023 12:13

Your DH is right perhaps his tone was poor though.

Cycling shorts shouldn't be allowed for school you can get knee length ones in H&M. Again though what ever happened to normal sport shorts?

I don't like to see short cycling shorts with a skimpy top showing everything....