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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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9
noblegiraffe · 20/06/2023 07:41

MargotBamborough · 20/06/2023 07:30

In that case nobody should be teaching about gender in schools because nobody understands it. Because it's nonsense.

I would be happy with that outcome.

Then you need to petition the government because it's currently a statutory requirement that schools teach children about gender identity.

Totorosfluffytummy · 20/06/2023 07:42

The guidance the schools receive is vague but the teachers - at my daughter's school at least - then choose to go down the route of favouring trans lobby groups over LGB groups when they source their materials. The trans lobby groups are everywhere so they're easier for the ill informed lazy teachers to find. The schools and staff like to get brownie points from Stonewall!
Peter Tatchell was speaking on a video shared with the kids at my daughter's school this week for Pride ffs & we all know his agenda!

Perfect28 · 20/06/2023 07:46

@blinksy ffs no did you even read the surrounding comments ?pp did .

OhBeAFineGuyKissMe · 20/06/2023 07:54

Perfect28 · 20/06/2023 06:37

@OMG12 so just to be clear if a child was openly racist, or sexist and I as a teacher called that view despicable you wouldn't rest until I was out of the profession?

At no point have I said I agree with the teacher in question, I don't. I don't think anyone does.

And actually if there are parents out there who think despicable views shouldn't be called out (let's be super clear, I am not talking about what is in the video in question) then something has gone very very wrong.

Everyone has jumped down my throat without reading what I've said which is essentially teachers need more guidance and clarity over the trans/self identification/gender issue. We are walking on eggshells and those who think it's as simple as 'theres two sexes just get on with it' don't understand the complexities of a classroom nor the vulnerability of some of these children (mh/safeguarding).

To answer the ops original question I do feel sorry for a teacher being secretly recorded and we have no idea what the student may have said before nor the wider class debate. That doesn't excuse the teacher's behaviour which I'm sure will be investigated.

I'm happy to stand corrected on the intersex thing, thanks to another poster for clarification there and I apologise.

  1. gender critical is “worthy of respect in a democratic society” so not comparable to racist or sexist.

  2. no I wouldn’t tell a student they were despicable even if they did say something racist or sexists and I certainly wouldn’t insult their parents. I think have told a class some comments are appalling but it was whole class and not directed at an individual.

I would say most teachers have come across racist, xenophobic, religious intolerance, sexism and/or homophobia. It isn’t tackled by trying to shout down the students and belittling them. That just gets beliefs more entrenched.

Back to 1. Saying “you aren’t a cat you are a girl” should not be punished. It is the truth!

Nellodee · 20/06/2023 07:56

How many people here, if they fuck up at work, would end up being an internet meme? That’s the crappy part. Not that she wasn’t wrong, but that we live in a society where you can end up trending on Twitter. I think politicians and celebrities are fair game, but I think it’s a very harsh thing to happen to a private person, unless they’ve done something truly despicable like murder or rape someone.

Nellodee · 20/06/2023 07:59

If this teacher was wrong, and I believe she was, then so will lots and lots of young teachers be, because they have been educated in modern schools and universities. She doesn’t deserve to be the centre of such a furore for holding a position that a huge proportion of her peers will also hold.

Cailin66 · 20/06/2023 08:00

Perfect28 · 20/06/2023 07:12

Actually students do have to endure a certain amount of religion in their education in the UK. Not pandering to someone doesn't mean it's ok to be a bully. Lots of trans people (and kids) don't feel safe, comments like yours do nothing to help that.

On what way do pupils have to “endure” a certain amount of religion?

In what way are trans kids unsafe?

ZeroFuchsGiven · 20/06/2023 08:05

Perfect28 · 20/06/2023 07:12

Actually students do have to endure a certain amount of religion in their education in the UK. Not pandering to someone doesn't mean it's ok to be a bully. Lots of trans people (and kids) don't feel safe, comments like yours do nothing to help that.

From reception age my ds would sit there eyes open straight faced as soon as 'hands together, eyes closed' was said by the teacher, He didnt care if it was just his class, the whole school or on stage infront of a hall full of parents. He did not believe in God and it was his own thought from a very young age, none of my other dc did that.

What didnt happen was the teachers bullying him and telling him he was wrong.

HoofWankingSpangleCunt · 20/06/2023 08:06

She was undertaking a role in the public sphere though. Not quite the same as an off duty teacher sending tweets.

Whatwouldscullydo · 20/06/2023 08:07

In what way are trans kids unsafe?

Well to be fair how can they be safe when they are treated according to policies written by people with some quite unsavoury back grounds /ideas etc

I mean we should all take advice from someone who doesn't think underage sex with adults is abuse right ? What could go wrong ?

GodHelpTheOutcasts · 20/06/2023 08:08

Cailin66 · 20/06/2023 08:00

On what way do pupils have to “endure” a certain amount of religion?

In what way are trans kids unsafe?

In the old curriculum pupils would learn select things about the main religions. However, that has been largely thrown out as it causes too many problems. It has left the new curriculum bland and lacking substance, so I can't see religious education limping along for much longer outside of GCSE, a level.

In certain schools in England, for example church of England schools, children are exposed to Christian ideology. I hope in time this will die out, as it's not really a choice of your only local primary is c of e.

But tbh, no they're not enduring Christianity in the same way as gender ideology, even in church of England schools. Even when I went to one in the nineties, I was allowed to be a non beliver and attend. Kids are not threatened with re-education of they don't agree Christ saved us all or bow their heads in prayer. As long as kids remain respectful, tolerance is shown.
I mean old fashioned tolerance being the natural type, not the forced activist type.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 20/06/2023 08:30

Now parents are losing cases in court to see what is being taught. At what point do we go " hang on a minute, if you are doing nothing wrong why are we worried it gets recorded or filmed or made public knowledge etc

I had a huge fall out with the deputy head a few years back, my ds took a photo in assembly of the screen on stage where they were being taught about all the genders, he lied and said he was just using his phone to zoom in as he couldnt read it, he was actually trying to send the pic to me. His phone was took off him and he was taken to the office where he was made to unlock it and hand it over for the photos (s) to be deleted. I asked to see what was being taught and what was shown on the screen but they would not tell me or show me. It was so ridiculous. it was the same shit being taught week after week with guest speakers and outside agencies (if that is what you call them) coming in.

I'll be honest, I didn't have the knowledge or balls to go full force with it back then but if I could go back in time now I certainly would.

borntobequiet · 20/06/2023 08:32

Anyone who would call a child’s views “despicable” to their face should reconsider their suitability for the profession.

FourTeaFallOut · 20/06/2023 08:34

Trans kids are absolutely not safe. There is an army of adults ready to swoop in with affirmative action to solidify the dysmorphia with a fairy tale of pink and blue brains and being born in to the wrong body, to hand with castrating and bone crumbling hormones and a surgeon's knife to seal the deal.

Whatwouldscullydo · 20/06/2023 08:35

I had a huge fall out with the deputy head a few years back, my ds took a photo in assembly of the screen on stage where they were being taught about all the genders, he lied and said he was just using his phone to zoom in as he couldnt read it, he was actually trying to send the pic to me. His phone was took off him and he was taken to the office where he was made to unlock it and hand it over for the photos (s) to be deleted. I asked to see what was being taught and what was shown on the screen but they would not tell me or show me. It was so ridiculous. it was the same shit being taught week after week with guest speakers and outside agencies (if that is what you call them) coming in

You lose every shred of sympathy and every scrap of ability to feign innocent when you act like that. Kids should be taught anything that you wouldn't teach infront of parents/family etc

The second you want stuff deleted and remove transparency you are admitting guilt imo.

Whatwouldscullydo · 20/06/2023 08:36

Kids shouldn't be taught that should say

noblegiraffe · 20/06/2023 08:38

Totorosfluffytummy · 20/06/2023 07:42

The guidance the schools receive is vague but the teachers - at my daughter's school at least - then choose to go down the route of favouring trans lobby groups over LGB groups when they source their materials. The trans lobby groups are everywhere so they're easier for the ill informed lazy teachers to find. The schools and staff like to get brownie points from Stonewall!
Peter Tatchell was speaking on a video shared with the kids at my daughter's school this week for Pride ffs & we all know his agenda!

Or perhaps the “ill-informed and lazy teachers” turned to the government statutory guidance that says that they are required to teach gender identity and specifically links to Stonewall as a recommended source of lesson plans and materials.

Blame the government, again, if you don’t want Stonewall stuff being used.

ItsFunToBeAVampire · 20/06/2023 08:41

noblegiraffe · 20/06/2023 07:41

Then you need to petition the government because it's currently a statutory requirement that schools teach children about gender identity.

How far would you go with that though?

Let's say the government brings out statutory guidance saying that being gay is wrong or abortion shouldn't be allowed, would you happily teach it because you've been told to? Is there anything that you could be told to teach that you wouldn't do? Because that's a dangerous and slippery slope if not.

And surely teaching about gender identity doesn't have to include anything more than saying "Some people believe X and some people believe Y" rather than saying "This is correct and everyone who disagrees is a bigot".

CheeseTouch · 20/06/2023 08:43

A minority of the population have genuine gender dysphoria and need proper evidence based medical support with it - and this nonsense erodes public goodwill towards people who are genuinely struggling.

Pointing out that a human cannot be a cat is factually correct. It isn’t belief, it’s material fact, provable with anatomy, physiology and genes. What next? By the same logic, adult men could identify as teenage girls. What could possibly go wrong?

The cat identifying girl would have got a detention for wasting class time if I was a teacher.

Totorosfluffytummy · 20/06/2023 08:45

Actually the DfE made it clear that they did not recommend Stonewall when complaints were made. They linked to several groups but also specified that schools must research the groups and their materials first to check their suitability for students. That was then on staff to do.

Baldieheid · 20/06/2023 08:45

I genuinely don't understand how schools are allowed to HIDE what they're teaching their students.

That's truly sinister.

I cant see a single good reason to hide what you're telling kids from parents.

It's the "shhhhh it's our little secret, nobody else needs to know" of the kiddy fiddler as he hands the kid the lolly after he's had his jollies.

I'm nauseated.

MargotBamborough · 20/06/2023 08:48

noblegiraffe · 20/06/2023 07:41

Then you need to petition the government because it's currently a statutory requirement that schools teach children about gender identity.

That means it's a statutory requirement to teach children about something which doesn't actually exist and which not even the people who believe it exists can describe or explain.

CheeseTouch · 20/06/2023 08:52

Exactly @MargotBamborough

It’s all just culture war bollocks from the Tory party to distract from the fact that our climate is in meltdown. To make us look the other way whilst they plunder public assets for their own gain.

MargotBamborough · 20/06/2023 08:53

Cailin66 · 20/06/2023 08:00

On what way do pupils have to “endure” a certain amount of religion?

In what way are trans kids unsafe?

Trans kids are unsafe because the biggest charity for trans children had a woman who had her own child's penis cut off as a 16 birthday present as its CEO and a self confessed paedophile on its board of trustees.

MargotBamborough · 20/06/2023 08:54

CheeseTouch · 20/06/2023 08:52

Exactly @MargotBamborough

It’s all just culture war bollocks from the Tory party to distract from the fact that our climate is in meltdown. To make us look the other way whilst they plunder public assets for their own gain.

Trouble is, Labour and the other parties are not going to step in and get this issue under control, are they? They think the Tories haven't gone far enough.

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