To feel pissed off that everyone is spelling my new baby’s name wrong?

[Algor1thm]

We’ve named our new baby a name which has several legitimate and well used spellings. The spelling we’ve gone with is actually the original spelling, but is the second most popular spelling in use in the UK currently. Think Isabelle versus Isabel for example. It’s not a made up or unknown spelling, and is completely phonetic. The name itself isn’t particularly unusual.

Almost everyone is already spelling the baby’s name wrong - over half of our new baby cards are spelt wrong. I’ve literally texted people “meet baby ‘Isabelle’” and right below they’ve written something like “congratulations, ‘Isabel’ is beautiful” etc.

I knew the spelling would be an issue going forward but I sort of expected people might be able to read what I’d written and spell it right the moment they were told the name. It’s probably just my hormones, but AIBU to think it’s quite rude not to make the effort to spell the baby’s name correctly in the new baby card?

The focus of this thread is people who don't check how to spell very common names. Spare a thought for the woman I once met whose Dad had decided to give her an exceptionally unusual name. It crops up once as an unusual spelling of the heroine's name in the Shakespeare play Cymbeline, and he was convinced the much commoner name usually found in this play is a typo. Her name was Innogen. In this typeface it's fairly clear it's not Imogen, but in many fonts it isn't, and handwritten I'd guess most people would automatically see Imogen. She had had a lifetime of correcting people. There was a certain weariness in her tone as she explained this briefly to me, and no wonder.

Both my two have names that get spelt wrong or hot slightly wrong even by people who know us well - then Evan/Owen/Ifan etc

Is it Freyja/Freya?

Oh man that's awful. I bet it causes issues with formal paperwork too. It's one thing having friends and colleagues misspell it, but when bills start coming in the wrong name that's a real headache.

My cousin has dual nationality and his name is spelled differently in each of his passports. Since they're both legal documents, I don't even know which is 'correct'! Fortunately this is his middle name so an easy enough issue to ignore.

I have a name like this and people including family still spell it wrong sometimes (I’m 30…). You and she will have to get over it.

This is an anonymous forum, I’m trying to keep it that way. I’m not doing it to intentionally be annoying!

@Algor1thm My DDs name has two versions of how it can be spelt. So yes, we get two spellings.

However we have found many people actually say the name as something completely different when they see it written down or talk about her. It’s a simple phonetic name and not that difficult to remember. It’s not spelt like the name people say. They say another name, I think, because it’s more familiar and simply cannot be bothered to read DDs name. They seem to see the first letter and make it up. We never thought for 1 second this would happen. The familiarity of a well known song trumps reading a 5 letter name it appears.

We've had this too, with my 7yo. Her name ends in 'y' but people put 'ie' ALL the time, and have since she was born.

Even the school have done it on certificates and she's been there since reception, I'm also a governor at the school! 🙄I haven't raised it because I don't want to look petty but it does wind me up. It's not a nickname either, it's her actual given name.

YANBU - I know so many people with baby boys called Sebastien/Sebastian/Sebastièn etc - I hate having to scroll back through old whatsapps to re remind myself how to spell their names, but I do it, because it's the right thing to do and are arsrhol move not to make a small bit of effort

Ah so your child has truly unique name?

I don't think YABU, but you will have to get used to it.

I get it all the time with my name...although mine is a perfectly valid, slightly different spelling to what people are used to and different pronunciation. Like Mary/Marie, Carl/Kyle etc

I realised recently that I'd been addressing some in emails as Hermione. Her name is Hermoine. 🫣

100% autocorrect OP, in the words of Disney classic Frozen, Let It Go.

😂

@HoppingPavlovaG , it's not a dick move to correct someone. If it matters to you, and you want to, then you should.

I usually say that people do not like being corrected, and often they just won't 'get it', especially with pronunciation.

I've been a bit embarrassed when I've lengthened someone's name to the wrong name or abbreviated someone's name when they don't go by the diminutive - something like called Jo Joanne when she's Josephine but always goes by Jo, or called Joanna Jo when she dislikes it

I hope I don't roll my eyes when I'm corrected, but that's what people do when/if I correct them (something like Jill not Gill/Gillian/JillIan, please).

I know you used this as an example and isn’t her actual name but this is exactly why we discounted Isabelle/Isabel/Isobel/Isabella/Ishbel etc etc

I struggle with the different spellings of Catherine for the 3 that I know. Sometimes my brain just does its own thing...

Right, but hopefully if one of them were, for example, your niece, or if you were replying to an email from them and the correct spelling of their name was right in front of you, you wouldn't get it wrong?

Hermoine is actually just a misspelling though. If my parents had named me Hermoine I would have changed it to Hermione (or something else completely) as soon as I as old enough. I'd hate to go through life knowing people thought my name was spelled/pronounced that way because my parents were numpties.

That said, I know someone who has misspelled not just one but two of her children's names, but I use the misspelling when I am asking after them, because it's not up to me to tell her how to spell her children's names.

Honestly I think you need to let it go. Surely you could anticipate this if you picked a name with multiple spellings

66 and people I've known for years still spell my name with the wrong initial letter despite it being a totally ordinary name. I'm just pleased my parents picked a name that can't be shortened.

get used to it - it will happen all her life - unless you invent a nickname.

Lily, Lilly, Lili, Lillie
Milly, Millie, Millee
Claire, Clare, Claire
Sean, Shawn, Shaun

I was reprimanded by MIL for pronouncing DH's cousin's baby's name incorrectly. I'd seen it written in the text and had only ever heard it pronounced in the most common way, but they had chosen to put expression on a different syllable. It was embarrassing to be told off instead of leaving me to figure out my mistake. Maybe they really don't mean any harm and will learn to correct spelling in tjme.

Naomi? I would say Nay-oh-mee, with the stress on the Nay, but some people say Nyohmee, usually with the stress on the oh part.

I don't think there are very many names where there's only one spelling, these days, and girls' names seem to be worse for this than boys' names.

I'd say NAY-oh-mi too, @Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g , and just don't understand why people say Nigh-O-mi.

Amelia, Olivia, etc only have one spelling (AFAIK), but I suppose Oliwia might be used if Polish. Cate, Lilly, Emelia and Elouise look like misspellings.
Efa (Evva) and Ela are quite normal names in Wales but look like misspellings outside Wales.

Nora Norah?