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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think this is absolutely disgusting and unecessary.

548 replies

Gettingbysomehow · 07/06/2023 12:50

So this happened a few miles away from where I live.
Call me old fashioned but I think this is totally inappropriate and somebody should have called the police.
I have been a naturist for 40 years but the old fashioned kind who doesn't think dangling your genitals in front of families and young children who have gone for a meal is at all appropriate.
I would question why they found the need to do this. There are plenty of naturist clubs in the area.
People go to naturist clubs to get an all over tan and be a member of an organisation that usually has a pool and cheap membership.
My non naturist friends think I'm being stuffy and ridiculous am I?
Diners shocked as naked pair enjoy meal in Burnham-On-Sea pub

Diners shocked as naked pair enjoy meal in Burnham-On-Sea pub

Diners at a Burnham-On-Sea pub say they were shocked after a naked man and woman walked into the bar and were served a meal.

https://www.burnham-on-sea.com/news/diners-shocked-as-naked-pair-enjoy-meal-in-burnham-on-sea-pub/

OP posts:
Cornettoninja · 07/06/2023 19:27

It is to do with social norms and context.
It is unusual to see naked people in a pub, and I wuld have red flags in my head.
If they are prepared to disregard these social norms then what other bizarre ways of thinking may they have? I would view the as loose cannons and give a wide berth

You’ve put into words how I feel I think.

It’s not a statement conveying any particular point, it’s just I want to be naked so I will. The only problems with that exist because of anyone who has a problem which is their problem despite me being the one breaking social conventions that exist for good and well understood reasons.

Jay199111 · 07/06/2023 19:59

They are just naturists, should have every right to be naked, it’s their body their choice. All this kind of talk about ‘they shouldn’t be there’ just sounds very similar wording to what racists and homophobic people sound like.

tellmewhentheLangshiplandscoz · 07/06/2023 20:00

The offence of indecent exposure (i.e flashing) also hinges on intent to cause alarm or distress. Simply being naked in public and going about your business does not in and of itself meet this definition.

//

How would you prove this though? Or that couple above weren't trying to cause distress?

Gtsr443 · 07/06/2023 20:02

Jay199111 · 07/06/2023 19:59

They are just naturists, should have every right to be naked, it’s their body their choice. All this kind of talk about ‘they shouldn’t be there’ just sounds very similar wording to what racists and homophobic people sound like.

So if Neil walks into my local caff with his cock and balls poking out of his flies that's OK is it?
If my son is queuing in McDonald's and Neil's missus is standing in front of him with her muff out that's OK is it?

Just trying to establish what level of nudity is now acceptable in eateries.

Elysiaxo · 07/06/2023 20:03

Jay199111 · 07/06/2023 19:59

They are just naturists, should have every right to be naked, it’s their body their choice. All this kind of talk about ‘they shouldn’t be there’ just sounds very similar wording to what racists and homophobic people sound like.

😂 😂

It's just attention seeking. Not comparable to racism or homophobia.

StaySpicy · 07/06/2023 20:16

Jay199111 · 07/06/2023 19:59

They are just naturists, should have every right to be naked, it’s their body their choice. All this kind of talk about ‘they shouldn’t be there’ just sounds very similar wording to what racists and homophobic people sound like.

Race and sexuality cannot be chosen. There are those who choose to be offended by these things, but they are not within a person's control and cannot be changed.

These people made a deliberate choice to remove their clothes and visit a public place.

VWHoliday · 07/06/2023 20:19

Jay199111 · 07/06/2023 19:59

They are just naturists, should have every right to be naked, it’s their body their choice. All this kind of talk about ‘they shouldn’t be there’ just sounds very similar wording to what racists and homophobic people sound like.

It really isn't the same and you should be embarrassed at typing such rubbish.

BanjoKnickers · 07/06/2023 20:20

StaySpicy · 07/06/2023 20:16

Race and sexuality cannot be chosen. There are those who choose to be offended by these things, but they are not within a person's control and cannot be changed.

These people made a deliberate choice to remove their clothes and visit a public place.

Show quote history

These people made a deliberate choice to remove their clothes and visit a public place.

There are those who choose to be offended by these things,

Just changing the order of your sentences ...

5128gap · 07/06/2023 20:29

Jay199111 · 07/06/2023 19:59

They are just naturists, should have every right to be naked, it’s their body their choice. All this kind of talk about ‘they shouldn’t be there’ just sounds very similar wording to what racists and homophobic people sound like.

Nonsense. The concept of bodily autonomy does not convey the absolute right to do what one wishes with ones own body regardless of impact and circumstance. Otherwise it would be open season for flashers, public mastubation, touching anyone and anything we wish (my hand, my choice!)
And its not remotely like barring a person becsuse of their race or sexually. No one is discriminating against them, as no one is saying they shouldn't be there. Simply that they shouldn't be there naked.

CoconutDrunk · 07/06/2023 20:31

Where I live they have an annual naked bike ride through the city.

tbh I think it’s mostly hilarious (the bike ride and the meal out)

if the owner/manager was fine with it I see no issue

StemStem · 07/06/2023 20:31

Imagine if this was a naked trans couple!!!!

ArabeIIaScott · 07/06/2023 20:32

Jay199111 · 07/06/2023 19:59

They are just naturists, should have every right to be naked, it’s their body their choice. All this kind of talk about ‘they shouldn’t be there’ just sounds very similar wording to what racists and homophobic people sound like.

And if someone sends an unsolicited dick pic, that's 'his penis, his choice'?

ClareBlue · 07/06/2023 20:36

StemStem · 07/06/2023 20:31

Imagine if this was a naked trans couple!!!!

How do we know it isn't. Plenty of women have a penis nowadays.

LardyDee · 07/06/2023 20:36

StemStem · 07/06/2023 20:31

Imagine if this was a naked trans couple!!!!

Mumsnet would spontaneously combust Grin

StemStem · 07/06/2023 20:37

LardyDee · 07/06/2023 20:36

Mumsnet would spontaneously combust Grin

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Good lord! This is worse than we first though 😱

Lockheart · 07/06/2023 20:45

ArabeIIaScott · 07/06/2023 20:32

And if someone sends an unsolicited dick pic, that's 'his penis, his choice'?

Show quote history

An unsolicited dick pic is a crime. Nudity in public is not.

That is the crucial difference.

5128gap · 07/06/2023 20:48

StemStem · 07/06/2023 20:31

Imagine if this was a naked trans couple!!!!

What difference would that make?

Lockheart · 07/06/2023 20:51

tellmewhentheLangshiplandscoz · 07/06/2023 20:00

The offence of indecent exposure (i.e flashing) also hinges on intent to cause alarm or distress. Simply being naked in public and going about your business does not in and of itself meet this definition.

//

How would you prove this though? Or that couple above weren't trying to cause distress?

It's difficult but it would be general context, historic behaviour, specific circumstances on the day etc.

An openly nudist couple who do this as part of an established lifestyle and who have documented their various travels on social media and who have sought prior permission from the venue are unlikely to be going to cause alarm and distress.

A flasher lurking in the park and deliberately cornering women to show his penis to is obviously doing it to cause alarm and distress.

VWHoliday · 07/06/2023 21:02

@Lockheart do you think it is OK for children to see strange adult genitals in every day life? How do you know it's not going to cause another person alarm or distress?

The venue and the naked couple are out of order.

Lockheart · 07/06/2023 21:09

VWHoliday · 07/06/2023 21:02

@Lockheart do you think it is OK for children to see strange adult genitals in every day life? How do you know it's not going to cause another person alarm or distress?

The venue and the naked couple are out of order.

What harm do you think is going to come to the children by seeing normal human bodies in a non-sexual context? They will see similar in changing rooms, for example.

The test of the criminal offence of indecent exposure is whether the naked couple intended to cause alarm or distress, not whether or not they did.

Again, I stress that I too wouldn't want to see this when I'm eating. But the couple haven't done anything wrong really, other than ignore social norms which I think we can all agree isn't a crime.

VWHoliday · 07/06/2023 21:24

Lockheart · 07/06/2023 21:09

What harm do you think is going to come to the children by seeing normal human bodies in a non-sexual context? They will see similar in changing rooms, for example.

The test of the criminal offence of indecent exposure is whether the naked couple intended to cause alarm or distress, not whether or not they did.

Again, I stress that I too wouldn't want to see this when I'm eating. But the couple haven't done anything wrong really, other than ignore social norms which I think we can all agree isn't a crime.

Show quote history

Genitals are for having sex with or getting rid of human waste. Some things should be kept covered unless a human chooses to see another humans.

That's my opinion and I'm sticking with it.

You don't see things like this on PG films and there is a reason.

LauraNicolaides · 07/06/2023 21:25

haven't done anything wrong really, other than ignore social norms which I think we can all agree isn't a crime

Perhaps you're new to Mumsnet Grin

VWHoliday · 07/06/2023 21:25

They are just attention seeking. Both the venue and the couple.

ArabeIIaScott · 07/06/2023 21:25

An openly nudist couple who do this as part of an established lifestyle and who have documented their various travels on social media and who have sought prior permission from the venue are unlikely to be going to cause alarm and distress.

How on earth do you come to that conclusion? Several people left; we can be fairly sure they were alarmed or distressed.

If the pub had made it clear that nude customers were on the menu, people could have avoided. If not, it's foisting nudity on people without their permission. It's non consensual and deliberately pushing at social norms and boundaries, deliberately trying to provoke.

Ardiaei · 07/06/2023 21:26

How does being naked become a hobby? It’s like it’s an activity in itself for these people.