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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to think this is absolutely disgusting and unecessary.

548 replies

Gettingbysomehow · 07/06/2023 12:50

So this happened a few miles away from where I live.
Call me old fashioned but I think this is totally inappropriate and somebody should have called the police.
I have been a naturist for 40 years but the old fashioned kind who doesn't think dangling your genitals in front of families and young children who have gone for a meal is at all appropriate.
I would question why they found the need to do this. There are plenty of naturist clubs in the area.
People go to naturist clubs to get an all over tan and be a member of an organisation that usually has a pool and cheap membership.
My non naturist friends think I'm being stuffy and ridiculous am I?
Diners shocked as naked pair enjoy meal in Burnham-On-Sea pub

Diners shocked as naked pair enjoy meal in Burnham-On-Sea pub

Diners at a Burnham-On-Sea pub say they were shocked after a naked man and woman walked into the bar and were served a meal.

https://www.burnham-on-sea.com/news/diners-shocked-as-naked-pair-enjoy-meal-in-burnham-on-sea-pub/

OP posts:
speakout · 07/06/2023 16:35

ArabeIIaScott · 07/06/2023 16:24

The offence of indecent exposure (i.e flashing) also hinges on intent to cause alarm or distress. Simply being naked in public and going about your business does not in and of itself meet this definition.

There is no 'simply being naked in public'. It's deliberate transgression of an obvious social norm. It's deliberate intent to cause alarm and distress, of course it bloody is, they wouldn't do it otherwise (or they'd be doing it among other naturists, where this would not be an issue).

I agree.
I walk alone in woodland near my home, I pass other people, but it is isolated. If I saw a man naked walking near me I would be alarmed and afraid.
It is to do with social norms and context.
It is unusual to see naked people in a pub, and I wuld have red flags in my head.
If they are prepared to disregard these social norms then what other bizarre ways of thinking may they have? I would view the as loose cannons and give a wide berth.

I remember some years ago the naked rambler was active, he would strip off to go pick up his children from primary school, and stand naked at the school gates with other parents.

VWHoliday · 07/06/2023 16:37

Did the managers say to each clothed customer when they were ordering their food "Just giving you the heads up we allow naked customers and there are a couple popping in soon" or have a sign saying "Naturists Welcome!".

sadlittlelifejane · 07/06/2023 16:39

Famzonhol · 07/06/2023 14:20

Well by that logic a man could sit on a playground park bench with an erection. He’s not harming anyone, it’s just a body, isn’t it? Would you draw the line against a mini-skirt? No, so what’s your problem with this?

😂 that's your argument.

TheGreatATuin · 07/06/2023 16:41

Lockheart · 07/06/2023 16:11

Yeah and they're all unpleasant, but other people don't require our consent to do those things in public either even if I don't want to see it. My consent is irrelevant. I'm not sure what your point is.

The point is that its rude, inconsiderate and causes upset to the people around them.
And its an extra layer of problematic for a man to expose his penis to women and children without them expecting it and when any reasonable person would know most of them would be uncomfortable.
As others have said, this can cause considerable trauma in those with a history of abuse.
There is a fairly simple rule here and that is "Is it a surprise penis?"
Seeing a penis should never be a surprise. It should either be somewhere expected such as a male changing room or clearly designated (!) naturist space or to someone who would reasonably expect to see it come out (in a consenting relationship for e.g).
This isn't that difficult. I'm tired of men getting their dicks out in front of people who don't want to see them and then acting like women are prudes when we object.
No surprise penis.

Hankunamatata · 07/06/2023 16:43

Ridiculous people. Save it for naturalist areas

NotTerfNorCis · 07/06/2023 16:44

We're brought up to be embarrassed by our own nudity and other people's. That's how it is in most countries, especially cold ones! So yes, what they did is gross. Plus, who would want to sit on those chairs after? Did they put special covers on them?

Famzonhol · 07/06/2023 16:45

Lockheart · 07/06/2023 16:26

I haven't said it's OK. I've said consent doesn't apply as a concept as no law is being broken. I wouldn't want to see them when I'm eating either. But they don't need my consent to be naked, even if I don't think it's ok in a pub setting.

What you think is ok and what other people need your consent for are two separate concepts.

Well going by the near unanimous disdain on this thread I think it’s clear that there are societal norms of decency that most people abide by and expect of others, regardless of whether a law exists.

There are people who will look for loopholes in laws so that they can do exactly what they want and yet still defend themselves in court. The law has to constantly and pedantically and expensively work to catch up with this nonsense. For example: “She didn’t say no” has now become “she has to say yes”.

Farmageddon · 07/06/2023 16:52

Brefugee · 07/06/2023 14:14

Guessing you're in Deutschland where nudity is a completely different kettle of fish tho. We have mixed naked saunas for starters and nobody bats an eyelid.

But surely you can acknowledge the difference between a specific place where people go to be naked - where the participants know in advance that others will be naked - and just rocking up naked to a busy public place?

And I've been to Germany before, I didn't see loads of naked people walking around the streets....

Famzonhol · 07/06/2023 16:52

sadlittlelifejane · 07/06/2023 16:39

😂 that's your argument.

No different from yours eh.

WestwardHo1 · 07/06/2023 17:08

Hankunamatata · 07/06/2023 16:43

Ridiculous people. Save it for naturalist areas

Naturist I think.

You'll not get many naked people at your average RSPB reserve.

ArabeIIaScott · 07/06/2023 17:27

Lockheart · 07/06/2023 16:30

Of course there is.

There are lots of nudist friendly places in the UK, apparently this pub is one of them. There are nude mass charity events. There are mixed nudist/regular beaches.

(I'm not a nudist myself and frankly can't think of anything more horrifying, if it's relevant.)

'Nudist friendly' is not 'public', by definition.

'Nudist friendly' is a place where everyone has tacitly or explicitly consented to be naked. (Fine.)

'Public' space is not. People are not routinely naked in public in the UK.

LakieLady · 07/06/2023 18:23

Twdfn123 · 07/06/2023 16:08

I live here, found it funny

I found it funny, too, but I hope they brought something to sit on.

Simplyfedup · 07/06/2023 18:38

Were they identifying as dressed?

DerekFaker · 07/06/2023 18:41

Nordicrain · 07/06/2023 12:52

I mostly think this is funny and just can't get worked up about it. I don't have the hang ups about nudity that most British people seem to have though.

Do you polish your Cool Girl badge every night or just on Thursdays?

GabriellaMontez · 07/06/2023 18:41

Is that hygienic?

DerekFaker · 07/06/2023 18:52

sadlittlelifejane · 07/06/2023 13:51

It doesn't really bother me. It's a naked body. We all have one. Where do we draw the line on where we should cover up? Some would find a mini skirt offensive. You wouldn't call the police on them..

Ridiculous argument there, but...

How about at genitals? I suspect that works for lost people.

DerekFaker · 07/06/2023 18:53

*MOST people

Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 07/06/2023 18:54

Gtsr443 · 07/06/2023 15:38

Did the chair leave an imprint on their arses when they stood up?
Where did they put their phones and bank cards?

Neil has a nice shoulder bag in the picture, though I should imagine the strap would be uncomfortable .

sadlittlelifejane · 07/06/2023 18:56

DerekFaker · 07/06/2023 18:52

Ridiculous argument there, but...

How about at genitals? I suspect that works for lost people.

So you think no one would be offended at people in some boxers and a pair of Knickers? Of course people would.

Nordicrain · 07/06/2023 19:01

DerekFaker · 07/06/2023 18:41

Do you polish your Cool Girl badge every night or just on Thursdays?

So not being bothered enough about nudity to be horrified and disgusted by this equals me trying to be cool? In any case it's Wednesday today.

ArabeIIaScott · 07/06/2023 19:06

I am so over men insisting on their human right to display their penises to everyone, apparently due to the belief that anyone who doesn't want to see their penis is repressed and needs to be educated to accept it.

Put it the fuck away, Neil.

ladydimitrescu · 07/06/2023 19:07

Wouldn't expect anything else from the railway!

Regholdsworthswaterbed · 07/06/2023 19:24

Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. I hope the attention seeking idiots spilt hot gravy where it hurts.

Regholdsworthswaterbed · 07/06/2023 19:26

Let's face it, the majority of people look better with clothes on

bozzabollix · 07/06/2023 19:27

There was a bloke who posted on social media local to me saying he’d be walking around a local area in the nude. It was the midst of winter. He got really upset because people rather than being shocked took the mickey. Obviously lots of referring to what the weather would be doing to his genitalia.

If the other restaurant diners had laughed themselves silly I’m not sure this couple would’ve been quite so happy with the reaction.