AIBU to show this to the teacher?

[thirdistheonewiththehairychest]

My daughter was in hospital having an operation the week before half term and her teacher asked a supply teacher to organise the class to make her a card which was very kind.

However I had to remove one of the kids contributions from the front of the card as it wasn't very nice. They had attempted to write in a secret code but it's pretty clear what it says... "You better f*ing be better you b**ch"

I don't know this girl at all, my daughter never mentions her. I think it was probably a misguided attempt at humour but was obviously really inappropriate.

Should I show it to their teacher so she can deal with it? Or should I just leave it and put it down to childish silliness?

When get well/leaving cards are made, it tends to be TA led. Teachers simply don’t have time to deal with things like this. I trust my TAs to check for anything inappropriate.

And the supply teacher will almost certainly not have seen anything on the card.

But it’s easy to see in a busy classroom environment, with the teacher absent, how this could have been missed.

I’d probably raise it with the teacher. But it reads like a child trying to be a bit edgy with a friend, rather than malicious.

the child has signed of LU which i assume means Love you so hope its just a missguided attempt at humour and not from a place of being mean. Hope your DD is feeling better op

As it's not meant nastily I would leave it. It looks like she's been watching or seeing things a bit too old for her, but I would take that as being you'd better fucking be ok bitch. Obviously it's far from great but I'd have a word with my own kid about that is not a great way to sign a card etc

I do take the point from the PP teacher that it would be a chance to explain to the kid that it's not an ideal sign off though.

That is not safeguarding. She could have heard it from a sister , tiktok etc likely an affectionate term given the rest of the card is nice.
DD might lie and say it's not her friend as she knows mum disapproves.

I think it would be wasting teacher time!

As they're only 9-10 years old, I'd mention it. I'm somewhat persuaded it's meant to be nice by her caring enough to correct her spelling though.

They are 9/10. Absolutely show the teacher. I’m surprised no one checked it though before it was sent (said as a teacher).

I would do nothing. The msg does sound like an in-joke and intent was to get well.

Did you show the teacher op? I think I would have.

It’s a very chavvy message but the sentiment behind it is actually supportive. Why on earth would you report it or be dramatic about it? The kid wrote bitch - jeez, in just over a year they’ll be heading to secondary school and if you think that’s apocalyptic you better strap in. 🙄

I disagree with this . I have my own Y5 and a young teen. I have also taught numerous Y5/Y6 and Y4 classes. It’s not ‘hysterical’ to think this is not appropriate. It may be meant as a joke, but that doesn’t make it okay. It could also be meant in another way as others have suggested. Either way, the teacher should know so they can explain to the girl that this wasn’t an appropriate message to send. It’s a card that came home from school.

If we are working with children, we should have certain expectations of them. I don’t believe we should just think this is fine and I’d be disappointed if my child’s teacher or TA thought ‘this is just how 10 years olds talk to each other nowadays’ so it’s fine!

For those who say a TA will have already seen it, if they had I would be very, very surprised that there is a TA anywhere who wouldn’t ask the child to redo this message and discuss it with them.

Absolutely agree with @Isitthathardtobekind

I too have similarly aged children to her and teach young adult students in university for entry into one of the health professions. If parents think this is just how young kids communicate and write get well cards without at least being spoken to about it, via school in this case, no wonder we live in such a sweary /shouty society.
Parents and teachers are the leaders, role models, guiding light for young children navigating the world

I'd definitely be having a word with the teacher. I work with Y5 and Y6 and would definitely want to know.

Am amazed at the responses. You say this is y5? That’s 9-10 year old. Absolutely shouldn’t be using that language nor should they be writing it as a “joke” on a card. I would have the same reaction if she was 16 years old. I am a secondary school teacher - this is not okay.

I’d definitely make the teacher aware. Worded in a way that isn’t accusing the teacher/supply or demanding action be taken (which it doesn’t sound like you want) but more from a “this is a strange thing for a primary aged child to say” perspective. It may fit into a larger picture, and I don’t think it’s making drama at all.

I hope your DD is okay!

Don’t be so prissy! Is your name Holly?

What a silly reply 🙄

@exaltedwombat sounds like a child or a bot