AIBU to show this to the teacher?

[thirdistheonewiththehairychest]

My daughter was in hospital having an operation the week before half term and her teacher asked a supply teacher to organise the class to make her a card which was very kind.

However I had to remove one of the kids contributions from the front of the card as it wasn't very nice. They had attempted to write in a secret code but it's pretty clear what it says... "You better f*ing be better you b**ch"

I don't know this girl at all, my daughter never mentions her. I think it was probably a misguided attempt at humour but was obviously really inappropriate.

Should I show it to their teacher so she can deal with it? Or should I just leave it and put it down to childish silliness?

I work in a primary school and would want to sees this.

It's important for children to understand what's appropriate and at this age on this card, it isn't appropriate.

Yes, I would report this to the teacher.

The child who wrote it either did it to be horrible or doesn't understand it is inappropriate. In either scenario the teacher needs to know in order to help the kid who did it.

If parents turn a blind eye to the little things, some kids miss out on the help they need at an early stage.

I would absolutely NOT ask my child.

It is not 'dramatic' to not want a y5 child to be called a bitch on a get well card. WTF is happening that this is even under question?

It sounds a bit like the humour you’d see on Twitter / tiktok where it’s people trying to be edgy and funny, they were probably just trying to copy that

The picture of the person in yellow looks pretty horrible too. Definitely speak to the teacher to ask them for their opinion. Doesn't look like a joke. It wouldn't be in code if it was.

Tell the teacher I think that's not normal humour for y5's.

I would mention it. Someone I know, their little girl drew a pig on a message to a friend as it is their fave animal and the teachers flagged that up, so they do check.

Year 5? Bloody hell! DS2 is in P6 (equivalent of Year 5 here) and I would definitely be having a word with the teacher. If it was an older child, I'd probably just roll my eyes, provided DC assured me it was humour and there wasn't a history of teasing or bullying, but it's really not on for a child of 10.

I teach year 5, I absolutely would want to know! Not school-appropriate humour or possibly bullying! I would be really unhappy with the supply teacher that hadn't checked it as well!

I would. I wonder how the supply teacher didn't notice this she obviously wasn't doing her job very well I'd mention for that reason tbh

Year 5 definitely show the teacher - our school would want to know this. It is inappropriate language

Year 5 that’s atrocious! Really shocked a Year 5 child would do that that. Aren’t they like 9/10 years old. I would take a photo and email it to the school office to forward onto the teacher.

Definitely let the teacher know, it's inappropriate
It's a silly thing to write and the child needs speaking to

Of course you should tell the teacher

It's a safeguarding issue.

It's not a normal thing for a child to write on a get well card

Talk about OTT. Might be inappropriate but says nothing at all about her homelife being unsafe. Maybe OPs daughter speaks to this person in the same manner for all we know.

As your dd has seen it I'd talk to her, see if it's misguided humour or nasty. Depending on the outcome of that conversation depends if I'd report it or not

The writing looks rather infantile for year 11.

Definitely report it, who is raising their child to write crap like that on get well cards

@RedHelenB

Not OTT at all

This is a big red flag re home life of the child that wrote this

I’d speak to your dd first. Not sure why you haven’t already? It’s definitely the kind of “joke” a year 5 would make, but I’m sure your dd will set you straight if not.

Im thinking a lot of posters on here don’t have children of their own or are rather naive about how some 10-11 yr olds talk to one another nowadays (I work with children). Some slightly hysterical responses here!

You get really high shelves in hospital rooms? I’d leave it tbh, no big deal. If your DD knows her well enough they write in “code” then they’re obviously friends.

It's worth mentioning to the teacher, but I disagree that it's a big red flag re home life. A lot of parents would be horrified by the things their child might write or say when they're not around.

Actually laughing at the responses here. Children start exploring with swearing in primary school, the language warrants nothing more than “don’t write swears in cards again” ffs 🙄🙄🙄

Lots of people throwing around the word safeguarding 🙄

Speak to your daughter and establish if this girl is a friend or someone that has been unkind in the past so you can gauge what the intention behind the note is. I have taught year 4 and year 5 and have dealt with several swearing incidents over the years. Most children write this sort of thing as a misguided joke. Either way, I would still mention it to the teacher as the child needs to know it is not appropriate.

If you know your daughter has seen it why not talk to her about it? You’ll hopefully gain some knowledge and can discuss how it’s not appropriate but I agree with others that it might be a friend just trying to be edgy.