White woman In a headscarf, would you stare?

[Tooshyshyhushhushidoi]

And conservative/ ‘modest’ clothing. Would you stare? Would you look twice?

context to follow :)

Nope. You and me both. I wouldn't stare at anyone, but definitely a double take coupled with an internal 'wtf?'. It would only be a fleeting reaction, and then I would get over myself/not care anyway, but I can't deny I have it

Yes! I notice that too, it’s quite fervent isn’t it!

Why would you think wtf?

They stare at Asian women too 🤣. I think they want to talk.

Good question. I guess I feel like that about all religions really, particularly those that dictate dress. And I'm surprised that anyone who hasn't been brought up with it would actively choose it. But it would be an incredibly fleeting reaction and I acknowledge not a justified one.

It seems that most women who ‘cover up’, do it happily, and it’s obviously their business, their choice. It just seems sad to me that any ‘religion’ oppresses women in this way, making them happy to hide themselves from the male gaze, and content to walk behind their husbands like some sort of second class citizen. Actually, yes. They allow themselves to be treated as second class citizens.

No doubt they would have another explanation for why they do it, but this is 2023. Women are not inferior to men and never have been, so why allow yourself to be controlled by these arbitrary conventions? Get a backbone!

Now I will await the onslaught………

I'd probably do a double take.

But I had a scarf that I used to wear over my head in winter. It kept my ears warm. It was sparkly and certainly didn't look like a religious garment.

I got looked at all the time ! So guess they thought it was religious

I had one time I walked into a predominantly Asian mosque and it felt almost movie esque, the crowd almost parted and it felt like everyone whipped the head around to look (in reality it wasn’t everyone) but I felt so self conscious that I ended up leaving

Not exactly the same thing but I have a disabled sister and people stare at her. It’s really hard still even though this has been going on my whole life!

if people glance over that’s fine and dandy, just normal behaviour. It’s the protracted stares that are difficult.

Best way I deal with it is a stare back at them directly into their eyes with a neutral expression. Hold their gaze for several seconds and they will feel uncomfortable, realise they’re staring and look away.

I guess the other thing would be to ignore it, but I sort of feel why should I? They’re staring at us so they get a stare back!

I really wish people would mind their own damn business and keep their eye balls to themselves but as has been said upthread I do believe it’s human nature to look at people who don’t completely conform to what they consider to be typical.

What do you mean. Like the Queen?

fighting the urge to say ‘oh fuck off’, fighting the urge to say ‘oh fuck off’, fighting the urge to say ‘oh fuck off’

This also works with rude S Asian men. Stare back at them- or sometimes I even go cockeyed-and they look away.

OP - I will be honest. Until this year, I would have looked twice - glancing, I hope, rather than staring! Just wondering if you were a convert or where you were from.

However, since visiting Medina at the beginning of this year, I now appreciate the hive diversity ad ethnicity and colour of Moslem women!

I'd look twice because it's not something I see often. Not the same as staring.

Even if I stare, it's not the same as judging, though rude to stare. If she looks nice, I'll even admire her but I'd mind my business. Wouldn't think twice about it after the few seconds it takes to look.

Way to fit as much judgement as possible in one post 🙄

Fair enough.

I was thinking the same. For me it is a symbol and agreement that women are inferior to men. I think women are in enough trouble now with all the gender stuff going on, without the tacit public acknowledgement that having to cover themselves up before going out in public is OK.

No but then I grew up in a really multicultural city so this wasn’t unusual.

To be fair people stare at anything new or different. It usually doesn't mean any negative thought although it's uncomfortable for the person being stared at, hence it's rude.

It's the people who're tutting and shaking their heads at the person that are exhibiting weirdo behaviour. Wtf is that for?

I wouldn't stare but I would think ffs why are you living like this? There are women all over the world that would give anything to have the freedoms we have here and yet here you are limiting yourself because of men.

Agree.

I'd probably think that as you were unlikely to have been forced to wear it, you were probably doing it for the attention.

I'd probably think

" ??? They told us you were dead, Your Majesty".

In my area, you wouldn’t stick out for a being a ‘white woman in a headscarf’, you would stick out for being a ‘young woman in a headscarf’. They’re mostly worn by older women here, and even then I could go months without seeing anybody wear one. I live in a border area in (Northern) Ireland though and there isn’t much diversity here.
So I think I might do a double take, but not in a judgemental way, but more to see if I saw what I thought I saw. Then I might do a third look just to see what the scarf actually looked like as there are some really beautiful ones.

You might want to look up 'male gaze', specifically Laura Mulvey. Evading the male gaze is deeply feminist