If your abusive parents offered you £70,000 - would you take it?

[Thenamechangey]

You don’t talk to your parents because they were very horribly abusive - physically, mentally and emotionally. You haven’t talked to them for three years because of their behaviour.

They get in touch and offer you £70,000 because they’ve sold a property and want to give you the money.

Would you take it?

I'd take it in a heartbeat. Any strings would be cut the minute it hit my bank account.

Yep - compensation,like someone said above.

Fuck yeah

I'm not ppv, so it would be thanks and bb

I would feel very conflicted accepting a gift and then stonewalling someone afterwards. I think the only way I could do it is if my parents outright said ‘We understand why you don’t engage with us and we don’t expect that to change, but we want you to have this anyway’.

Send them your bank details. I wouldn’t converse with them.

I'd also make sure if you did that you're not the sort of person who dwells on things, because that is the kind of thing that could bring up all sorts of bad feelings. If you do, put it in a bank for a few years first and see how you feel about it. If you take it, then regret it you'll be worse off. Money isn't worth it.

I took money from my parents, a similar amount. I thanked my parents, regularly, frequently, sincerely, happily but it turned out that they interpreted my reluctance to collapse in to their false narratives about me ''ingratitude''.

I'm nc with my parents and I absolutely would take it. I like the pp idea of new basic account for them to pop it into. I definitely wouldn't restart contact though.
Just a pipe dream for me though - come from a really well-off family and I know I've been written out of all the wills but it would be life changing!

Take it, even if you burn it in a bonfire, they won't have it to spend.

Yes, take it and treat it like compensation!

One of mine used to say, if you break something you pay to get it fixed.
Well in that case Dad you better start paying out for my therapy bills then!

Take it. They owe you. But to echo everyone else, don't get sucked back into contact and FOG.

Mine did and offered me £400 K there was a catch though and it involved contact and my children - the answer was no.

And no I don’t regret it

I'd take it. I believe in the 'trauma tax' that those with difficult childhoods have paid...as in the time it takes you to heal, opportunities you might miss as a result of poor self esteem, lack of support, etc. Consider it a gift from the universe and use it to make your life easier. Sounds like you earned it.

Yes

Why would anybody say no? Like actually why, I can even think of one reason not to. This is real life, not a film.

Of course everyone would say yes to £70k (or any substantial amount of money)

Nope. Not if it meant reestablished any sort of relationship with them. I've actually been in this situation, refused the money and refused contact. Money can't buy that feeling of peace.

I wouldn't. I just sat and thought about it for a moment and it gave me anxiety to think if accepting it. I couldn't be arsed with the agro of them lording it over me. That is just me though and my complex relationship with my own parents. I can absolutely see the other side.

Hmm depends came with strings

Why would anybody say no? Like actually why, I can even think of one reason not to. This is real life, not a film.

I don't want anything from them. Why would I? I have to live with the result of what they did to me every day of my life. It would just be another trigger for my PTSD seeing their money in my account.

Of course everyone would say yes to £70k (or any substantial amount of money)

No really, I would not. I don't want any contact with them. That would involve contact of some description. I'm not interested. I'm also not loaded either. I live on adult disability payment, child benefit and payment and tax credits. We struggle our way from one week to the next but I'm far better a person than to lower myself for their cash.

Not surpised posters are saying they'd take it and OP is considering it which is why you're asking. Money talks, principles are dropped, anything goes.

Personally, no I wouldn't take it (I didn't when I had the opportunity to do so).

I think this is abit narrow minded tbh. Not everyone can put a price on their peace of mind. You don't know what issues accepting that money could cause the OP, you're just thinking about the instantaneous reward.

Yep,

And go no contact again after

This

No.

I've been NC with my parents for several years and they are rich as croesus.

I don't care how much money they have.

I'm not for sale.