To think holidays with kids are a bit shite?

[Moosethroat]

Currently abroad with DD7. For the most part, she is okay and we are having a good time but I'm honestly fed up of the spoilt, entitled behaviour. You'd think she took ME away. Just us so no one else to leave her with so I can have a break. We've had some really lovely experiences together: jetski, quads, parasailing etc but just fed up of having to constantly remind her about her behaviour or the way she is talking to me etc, wayyy more than I would at home, it's making me feel on edge like what next. Also she just wants to rush through EVERYTHING no matter how many times I have to remind her that there is plenty of time to do everything and we don't need to do 10 things in one day. I don't want to say its spoiling my time, but I'm definitely reconsidering whether to do this again for the next few years but I want to be able offer her experiences in new countries (and myself!) but thousands of pounds to not feel relaxed doesn't feel like a good deal lol

more about the way she believes it’s acceptable to behave.

I understand that it's very easy to critique someone else's parenting skills but how has she learned about consequences for this behaviour ?

I must be in the minority here as I love holidaying with my son 😅 Admittedly he is only two and we do city breaks rather than beach holidays (as my husband and I don't enjoy the beach) so we have no expectations of being able to sit in the sun. He's a fabulous little travelling companion 🥰

There is something to be said for boredom to help children

Ha. I had breakfast in a hotel yesterday.
It was like a half term hell. Loads of grumpy teenagers, screamy toddlers and shattered looking parents. You do wonder sometimes why we bother 😂

I always go somewhere with a Kids Club so that I get a bit of a break and they make friends they can then play with at the mini disco at night.

Then it's fun to chill at the beach/pool with them.

I've done the single parent holiday. I would overcome your concerns and strongly encourage her into kids club for a morning or 2 so you can just sit and breathe.

When ds was your dd age we went with friends (I’m on my own) they got on fine and swam in the pool most of the day abs it was lovely (well sometimes)

now he is a teenager this spring springs to mind the air of misery is palpable

In theory this sounds great but the reality then is you have whining child who is bored and sullen.

This is why people gladly pay to take their child’s friend on hols too although 7 is too young to do that really.

OP Are there any kid’s clubs she could go to for a few hours every day or even every other day?

Just had an exhausting day with couple of kids and thinking exactly the same thing!

not Only is it just parenting in a different place, but holidays do bring out the worst in kids.

I think it’s because of over- excitement and change in routine. Nothing to do with you!

have also come to the conclusion that it’s best to keep it as simple as possible. No point in wasting loads of money. Self catering beach holidays, basic but clean hotel with a pool and they’re as happy as Larry. Save the nice holidays for when they’re older. ( or you can get away without them!)

I used to holiday alone when DS was at Cub or Scout camp.

Yesssss - both happy.

have also come to the conclusion that it’s best to keep it as simple as possible. No point in wasting loads of money. Self catering beach holidays, basic but clean hotel with a pool and they’re as happy as Larry. Save the nice holidays for when they’re older. ( or you can get away without them!)

This! Or an AI with a kids club so you can relax a little and not have to cook during your supposed ‘downtime’.

Im not suggesting a kids club all day every day but to spend a couple of hours there after breakfast or in the evening.

Has your dd read Daisy and the Trouble with Holidays? It's about a single mum who takes her dd on holiday. It cracks me up.

I was not brave enough to take my dd abroad on my own until she was 17yo 😂

Agree the best holidays when they're little are ones with lots of kids activities, is she good at making friends? My dd was good at finding a mate to play with.

Spoilt behaviour would not be tolerated by me at all, even if it's just on holiday is nip it in the bud with a consequence.

I think you answer why you’ve found holidays with kids enjoyable with the word ‘we’.

it’s a different kettle of fish being a sole parent.

you can’t even have a shit in peace.

She’s 7. Ffs. Give her a break.

im a single parent too - also recommend kids clubs etc

I think it's just hard. When you have someone to split it with, you get maybe an hour downtime to read or relax but on your own it's just relentless. There will be lots of nice memories but you will be knackered now and struggle to see how much fun you are having. Don't underestimate how much yours and your daughter's tiredness will be affecting you both. She's just showing it in an annoying way because she's little.

I’m currently on holiday and having a low moment. I don’t think I’ll ever have a relaxing family holiday again.

Both of my boys have additional needs, the younger one is unlikely to ever be independent.

The holiday just brought home what a long and unrelenting road I’m on.

There will be lots of nice memories but you will be knackered now and struggle to see how much fun you are having. Don't underestimate how much yours and your daughter's tiredness will be affecting you both. She's just showing it in an annoying way because she's little

I totally agree.

My 3 kids were absolutely horrible on holiday for the first few days, they would argue, bicker, be quite difficult. But after a couple of days, they would settle back to their normal selves, I think they just found travelling/adjusting to new routines/environments to be a bit overwelming, and tiring.

If it's any consolation, you will probably look back in years to come, and remember the good bits of the holiday more than the difficult bits. I know I do!

Children like routine and so holidays can be really overwhelming.

Remind her of her behaviour and how fortunate she is to be on holiday.

Ask her what she’d like to do and then compromise by saying you’ll do that after you’ve done what you want to do.

I would definitely look into the kids clubs, even if just for an hour.
She will get to play with kids her own age and at 7 you don’t have to worry as much about her being mistreated or anything.

Yeah, we’ve downgraded to camping (which is always similar so they know what to expect) where at least the kids can generally be feral with campsite friends. Or Haven, as mine are still of an age where they love the tacky entertainment and a 2p arcade, plus day drinking with kids in tow is de rigueur.

The relaxed break with trips to galleries and cocktail bars are long gone.

After our first holiday away with our DS, which was exhausting, friends with older children advised us to stop calling it a holiday, and to call it a ‘change of scenery’. It’s helped us shift (ahem, lower) our expectations hugely 😅 and we do actually have a nice time away together now!

This is true. But the "same shit, different location" thing gets trotted out on every thread about holidays with children, regardless of how many adults are involved.

Sounds like my 15 Yr old boy. We always book camp sites that have activities that he likes, he is outgoing so if there is a soccer pitch all is good. It is literally our main criteria. He goes out and only meets us at mealtimes where we put up with his shit for 30 mins then home at bed. It's the only way, if we tried to spend time together it would be a nightmare and total waste of money. Everyone else in the family gets on better this way, sad but true

My theory post kids is any holiday you would have loved pre-kids will be utterly shit, but anything you would have hated pre-kids will probably be better than you think. That said a house by a beach somewhere quiet (like Scotland or Northumberland) is also a good choice.

Nailed it.

This makes me sad. So many people on here would love 1) a holiday and 2) to have healthy children.

I'll never forget the time took my two away for a mini-break after I'd split with my partner. My stress levels were so much higher when I was solely responsible for everything. Single parent 'holidays' aren't comparable to being on holiday with a partner. Looking back, there were some lovely moments but at the time it felt the total opposite of relaxing.