not to share my table at outdoor cafe

[ShirleyEyeRosebud]

Went to my favourite cafe with my lovely dog for a relaxing Sunday morning brunch fry up.
All the tables were occupied, so we stood feeling a bit self-conscious waiting for about 20 minutes for a table to become free. In the meantime, a kind couple did ask if I wanted to share their table, but I didn’t want to disturb their relaxing morning so I said thanks for the offer but it’s ok.
So, eventually a table became free so I left my bag there to reserve it and went inside the cafe with the hound to order. When I was queuing up to order a woman asked if I had finished with my table so I said no I have just arrived. She then said are there many of you (obviously not) or can we share your table?
I said Sorry I have been waiting for a table and I would rather have it to myself.

AIBU?

I'd previously explained you can't vote on the app. My comment referred to the majority of comments

There's a job with your name on it in politics 🤣

The only tables provided were 6 seater picnic tables. That is the cafes decision and nothing to do with OP. Are you therefore suggesting single people have no right to enjoy a peaceful meal at their own table at this establishment? Wind your neck in.

It's utterly bizarre, isn't? Not even a basic understanding of how statistics work.

Re @meatbaseddessert post/photo. I agree. The people posting a picnic bench that allegedly only fits 4, are purposely picking smaller ones to suit their narrative.

If you were to buy one from B & M/Homebase etc, you would indeed probably get a small-ish one that would comfortably only fit 4 people and would be a squash for 6. A PUBLIC one is always like the one pictured here. OP is being very unreasonable. To be at a PUBLIC bench like this and think it's acceptable to have it to yourself is ludicrous and selfish.

Like a few other posters, I would have just sat down at it anyway (where the OP is.) It's a public bench in a public place. OP does not own the bench and has no right to take ownership of it. If she doesn't want me there she can move.

Anyone telling me to move after I had sat at the bench they deem to be theirs would get a VERY short shrift from me. I have no time for people like this, and would swiftly put them in their place.

And actually after this thread I am not even going to ask again. If there are only one or two people at a 6 seater bench, I will just sit at it - in one of the spare 4 or 5 seats!

Reposting the standard six-seater picnic bench for the hateful space invaders desperate to eat their sandwich while sitting in OP’s lap, no wonder this country is going to hell.

LOVE IT!!! @bussteward 😆

A PUBLIC one is always like the one pictured here. OP is being very unreasonable. To be at a PUBLICbench like this and think it's acceptable to have it to yourself is ludicrous and selfish.

I've never seen a picnic bench in a cafe or restaurant that looks like that. Always the smaller wooden version posted up thread. Yours looks like you frequent some scabby easy wipe down establishments.

I'd like to see the reaction from people when you plonk yourselves down at their table, following your decision based on this thread though. 🤣 I am fairly certain it won't take long until you find that people will not respond generously to you in real life. Be bloody hilarious to see you pick the wrong bench to invade though 😉

The small picnic tables are domestic/private really from the likes of B&Q etc.

Outdoor attractions/park cafes, etc., use the much bigger ones like these. They're clearly able to sit 6 comfortably, so are fair game for 1 or 2 people being joined by another 1 or 2 people, as there's still the middle seat unoccupied, just like you'd do at a circular 6 person table. It's the unused seat in between different groups that makes it acceptable. Not quite so acceptable if it were a group of 4 trying to join a couple on a six person table as then there's no gap between them.

That’s not a picnic table.
Thats a separate table and two benches.

I think it’s difficult to say exactly that 6 people could fit on the picnic table that OP mentioned as sizes are so varied depending on make.

The average 6 person picnic table is 1500mm long but standard dimensions for sitting set 1500mm as a 4 person table with two at either end. So assuming there were no free standing chairs the table would seat 4 with fixed seating. To be a 6 person you need nearly 2000mm.

The point really is whether it’s OK to feel if asked you should share a table.

Also whether it’s OK to ask a single person who may be more intimidated by sitting with a couple than maybe asking another couple.

I would feel far less intimidated if I was with someone else than if I was on my own.

( image taken from metric handbook )

Wow you are quite the CF @ShirleyEyeRosebud . You hogged a table for 6.
YABVVVVU.

@mainsfed

It's irrelevant that people can't vote on the app, because most likely if there was app voting, it would be split the same.

😂😂😂😂

Where's your evidence for that?

Many people vote without commenting. (I've often seen that when using the desktop version).

On the app, people can't vote & so will comment.

We can't know how the proportion of commenters would break down exactly in a vote BUT factually, there are MORE posters commenting that OP is BU than are saying she is not BU. 💁🏻‍♀️

That's hilariously batshit

It's 'hilariously batshit' you can't manage facts - do see my previous post.

Why so aggressive in your posting? 🤔

It's utterly bizarre, isn't? Not even a basic understanding of how statistics work.

I think what might be 'utterly bizarre' is your inability to understand facts - there are definitely more posters commenting that OP is unreasonable than saying she is reasonable.

We can't know how all posters would vote, as many can't vote. You can't say the proportion voting on the website / desktop version vs app would be the same - you've no evidence.

The other bizarre thing is your targeted rudeness.

Have you actually counted the posts, Earrings, those for OP and those against?

Because until you do that, you really should stick to the facts that we have, which is that 55% of people think OP is NBU.

Wasn't it you that called OP 'hilariously bonkers'? Did you also think that was aggressive?

As I said, stick to the facts we have, until you can count the posts.

It's truly bizarre how you think you are sweetness and light but that anyone who disagrees with you is aggressive or rude.

I think this depends too, two people who could sit at the other end of the table without bothering you, fine, 4 people then no.

I don’t mind sharing my table with another single person, but I hate it if a couple or more want to share- they end up dominating and all you can hear is their conversation. I think in that situation it is much better for a couple to share with another couple rather than disturb your peace and quiet.

OP I think you were not being unreasonable. You stood in queue to wait for a table. You got a table and had your food. I wouldnt have shared either. You don't spend your hard earned money having a meal to have to share a table with a stranger. Screw that.

Blimey what a fuss! It's only a Sunday morning fry up at a cafe, not a special occasion at Le Gavroche.

It's not for you to decide what is or what isn't a special occasion for someone else.

YES I am suggesting that and wind your own neck in please...😡
I think its' fairly obvious that if any catering establishment, be it cafe, pub or otherwise chooses LARGE PICNIC BENCHES as their ONLY seating then they are NOT expecting that only ONE person would assume they could sit in solitude at each bench especially at busy times, that's the whole point of having picnic benches! 😳
It's simply irrational to think otherwise and anyone who does think this is acceptable could be considered more than slightly selfish and entitled?
The OP keeps purposefully saying 'TABLES' when clearly this is NOT the reality and (I say this not unsympathetically but reasonably and logically) no matter how much she tries to vilify her behaviour using her 'issues' as an excuse it simply won't wash!! 🤔🙄

It's interesting that you're only targeting single people. Clearly you think a couple occupying a bench is fair dos.

AnarchoTyrannosaurus

It's not for you to decide what is or what isn't a special occasion for someone else.
Good grief! There's no need to be so snappy. I didn't decide anything! I had an opinion on about something. Massive difference!
People are losing their mind on this thread!

Goodness me. No need to shout to try and make your incorrect point. It doesn't add any more weight to your opinion.

Of course paying customers have every right to expect to sit at their own table to eat. And for that reason I definitely wouldn't be making room for strangers to join me.