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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Have covid and attend outdoor event, would you go?

297 replies

Mydietstartstomorrow · 28/05/2023 06:59

Tested positive for covid on Friday after feeling rough for a few days but just thought it was a head cold, was pretty surprised when that red line appeared! Felt much better yesterday and this morning. There’s an outdoors music festival on today, which I’d ruled out since said red line but friends (ones that were, 3 years ago, very freaked out by the whole thing, rule abiding, social distancing fanatics etc) are like “it’s fine just go, it’s just a cold now” etc! But I feel uncomfortable about it. Obviously I wouldn’t hug anyone or cough on them (bit of a cough still!) wwyd? Would you still go?

OP posts:
Toomanylosthours · 28/05/2023 08:55

Soapyspuds · 28/05/2023 07:43

IF somebody is that susceptible from getting badly ill from covid they should not be going to a music festival. OP go and have a great day if you feel well enough.

Wow. So should people will illnesses spend all their life having the soul sucked out of them alone in a darkened space?!

Fandabedodgy · 28/05/2023 08:56

If you feel well - go
If you feel unwell - stay at home

jenny38 · 28/05/2023 08:57

Glad you have decided not to go Op. I could never knowingly risk passing on a virus that might harm someone. Whilst there is a load of people saying it's just like a cold, the reality for others is very different. My own experience- I caught a virus, and am now unable to work and needing a wheelchair, due to a virus. My immune system struggles with any sort if infection. I am vigilant, take precautions when I can, but would hate to think someone was knowingly exposing others.

AsphaltGirl · 28/05/2023 08:57

Mydietstartstomorrow · 28/05/2023 08:43

Thank you Glorious for your very rounded post! It’s interesting to hear from someone that is immunosuppressed how they feel.
I have tested negative this morning but have decided not to go as I’d just feel too uncomfortable, it’s not right.
I was thinking this anyway, not a carefree fck it attitude that some replies seemed to think, but was interested to see if most people think like myself or whether I’m being over cautious and should just get on with it!

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If you've tested negative then why are you not going?

GreenWheat · 28/05/2023 08:58

SouthCountryGirl · 28/05/2023 07:32

Their friends and family might be though?

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So that's on them. It's not my responsibility to ensure that the friends and family of vulnerable people never catch anything that might hurt their friends and relatives. Never has been.

Flopsythebunny · 28/05/2023 09:00

GreenWheat · 28/05/2023 07:23

Those people are probably not at a music festival though, are they? As in, a place swarming with people at close quarters who could have any number of diseases dangerous to people with compromised immune systems.

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No, they are still stuck at home 3 years on with people telling them that its time to get out and about because covid isn't a thing anymore

Littlegoth · 28/05/2023 09:01

Going out knowing you have a contagious illness that could kill someone or have long term implications for their health … well, there are several words for that type of person.

Sirius3030 · 28/05/2023 09:01

DisquietintheRanks · 28/05/2023 07:15

Yes probably, if I was feeling well and felt I was pretty much at the end of the infection.

If you have virus in your airways then you are infectious. And will be so until you test negative.
On the other hand, it’s outdoors, and most people are vaccinated so the disease is less severe.
But on balance I would stay home.

curlymom · 28/05/2023 09:02

I wouldn’t go and risk other people. People are quick to say it’s a little thing as they didn’t get bad symptoms from it. But I know a person who is young and attends concerts who is immunosuppressed and I know it would severely damage them. There are many people like that and I would feel uncomfortable knowing I may be next to them at a place like a concert. Those people could get really sick from any virus also not just covid

SalviaDivinorum · 28/05/2023 09:02

I was coming on to say that I would not go but seeing your update that you are testing negative now and it’s an outdoor event I’m changing that to I would go.

Fandabedodgy · 28/05/2023 09:02

The return of COVID bingo!

Sirius3030 · 28/05/2023 09:03

AsphaltGirl · 28/05/2023 08:57

If you've tested negative then why are you not going?

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Exactly. If you are testing negative then you have little or no virus in your airways, and so are very unlikely to be infectious.

WeekendInTheBoondocks · 28/05/2023 09:05

Bbqshowdownusa · 28/05/2023 07:48

Yes I’d absolutely go. Im not staying in doors and missing events over something as minor as covid anymore.

You don’t have to stay in doors and waste your life away anymore. Go out and live.

Such a selfish, ignorant attitude

  1. selfish prick goes to concert with covid
  2. selfish prick passes their infection into concert goer
  3. concert goer goes to Tesco and unwittingly passes Covid to woman suffering with cancer undergoing chemo
  4. woman with cancer dies from Covid infection her body was not able to handle

Covid isn’t a cold. It has far reaching consequences. You could be wholly responsible for creating a tsunami of hell for one person simply because ‘I have to live my life and enjoy myself’

the epitome of solipsism.

Dodger101 · 28/05/2023 09:06

I would go. I haven't tested in a long time and have had a number of colds since.

GIorious · 28/05/2023 09:07

Flounder2022 · 28/05/2023 08:54

But she does know!

@Bbqshowdownusa

'Im not stopping my life for something so minor.' Pray it doesn't decide to stop yours. House bound for 6 months. Almost at a year off work. Still unable to walk up more than 1 flight of stairs. Constant severe pain in my whole body. Early menopause. In agony if I walk more than 20 mins.

Has the common cold done that to you?

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All viral infections carry the risk of long term health issues so yes, the common cold can do this. It can also kick off autoimmune conditions such as RA.

Have you always stayed home when you have a runny nose? Have you always expected others to?

AsphaltGirl · 28/05/2023 09:07

Sirius3030 · 28/05/2023 09:01

If you have virus in your airways then you are infectious. And will be so until you test negative.
On the other hand, it’s outdoors, and most people are vaccinated so the disease is less severe.
But on balance I would stay home.

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But she HAS tested negative.

It makes no sense at all.

AdvertisementBoard · 28/05/2023 09:09

Go if you feel better. Just don’t test in future. There’s no point asking here because there is no one clear response.

Tessisme · 28/05/2023 09:11

How strange to decide not to go now that you have tested negative. Why is it 'not right' to go?

StormShadow · 28/05/2023 09:12

GIorious · 28/05/2023 09:07

All viral infections carry the risk of long term health issues so yes, the common cold can do this. It can also kick off autoimmune conditions such as RA.

Have you always stayed home when you have a runny nose? Have you always expected others to?

Show quote history

Exactly.

On the subject of the OP specifically, I'd go, but if you feel awkward about being there and won't enjoy it then it makes sense to stay away. You'd probably have more fun at home.

Justcallmebebes · 28/05/2023 09:13

I'd go, simply because I wouldn't have tested so wouldn't know if I had covid or not

GIorious · 28/05/2023 09:14

Toomanylosthours · 28/05/2023 08:55

Wow. So should people will illnesses spend all their life having the soul sucked out of them alone in a darkened space?!

Show quote history

I've been going to gigs and festivals for years, and will continue to do so.

Here's the thing. I'm immunosuppressed and it's shit but I wouldn't expect others to restrict their lives because of me (early days of covid when there were no vaccines or antivirals notwithstanding - that was a public health emergency, which is now over). To expect others to do so would make me the selfish one.

When covid has been rife (eg December 21 with Omicron) I made the decision to avoid certain places. My choice, to protect myself. I probably wouldn't have gone to a festival then, but I wouldn't expect others not to.

I fully accept that I may catch covid (again!) if I do 'normal' things. That's fine. I could just as easily get really ill from flu or noro or a hundred other things. But it's my decision. My condition typically cuts ten years off your life and disables as it progresses - I can already feel it getting worse year on year. Like fuck am I going to waste the good years I have left hiding.

Stop portraying all immunosuppressed people as frail housebound wraiths who need protection. It's ableist and utter rubbish. And unless you've never left the house with a runny nose, ever in your life, you're also being a hypocrite.

ChickenSlims · 28/05/2023 09:16

I'm a nurse, I work in a large hospital. Our trust guidelines are that we no longer test if symptomatic, and are expected to work if well enough.

I'd attend the event without a second thought.

GIorious · 28/05/2023 09:17

Oh and the NHS advice above literally tells you to go about your daily activities if you feel well enough.

Back in the dark days of 2020 people here were hellbent on following the advice to the letter. Why aren't you now?

Willmafrockfit · 28/05/2023 09:18

no dont go
the wrong thing to do

GIorious · 28/05/2023 09:19

ChickenSlims · 28/05/2023 09:16

I'm a nurse, I work in a large hospital. Our trust guidelines are that we no longer test if symptomatic, and are expected to work if well enough.

I'd attend the event without a second thought.

DD is a teacher in a SEND school. Some of her students are the in most vulnerable category.

The guidelines for all staff are the same as for you. And students also have to come in if they have covid, if they're well enough.