To cut DD's beautiful hair short?

[Eurydice84]

DD (4yo) has beautiful blonde hair, down to her bottom. It has lovely curls but she absolutely hates having it brushed, so the result is often a tangled mop of knots. We also go swimming two or three times a week in the pool, and despite using a swimming cap and hair masks the chlorine is not very kind to her hair. We decided to cut it in a French bob (think Amelie from the movie) and donate to the Little Princess Trust, but I am getting a lot of "oh poor her" comments. People saying it might be easier to have long hair for reception next year, as it can be tied in a ponytail? I am planning to use Alice bands and barrettes but not sure whether they are allowed at primary school?

Just to add our experience... my daughter has the most beautiful long hair and always has but for one time when she wanted to have it cut (she was about 8 or 9 at the time and I was against it.
She got her wish and grew it back!

She's 4. She doesn't get to decide.

Don't be ridiculous.

DD started Reception with a bob and we never had any issues.

DD2 did as well - she has only slight curl not like DD1 and me and it was actually fairly easy to get a nit comb though despite it being very thick hair.

DD1 and me have curly thick hair and shoulder of very short tends to be best place for ours but we know this as have tried other lengths - hair grows back you learn to deal with its foibles.

Bum length hair on a 3 year old who hates hair being brushed and regularly goes swimming seems very impractical anyway - I'd cut it now and experiment with length and curl - and sometimes as PP mentioned short hair with curl hair is actually harder - while she isn't bothered.

She's 4. The hairdresser gets to decide, as they are not there to pin down your 4 year old child and hack lumps off because you CBA to learn how to deal with hair gently.

How on earth do posters think parents of child with Type 4 hair manage? They don't go for the nuclear option or tear brushes through the kids' hair.

A trip to a hairdresser who is confident with different hair types for a wash, detangle and mid back/below shoulders cut not only makes the entire experience more pleasant for the child, which can make them more relaxed about normal haircare, it can be a learning experience for the parent in seeing how somebody who knows what they're doing treats curly hair.

My DD also hated having her hair brushed, and asked for it to be cut into a bob. Much, MUCH easier to keep tangle free now, and she’s much happier as a result! She goes swimming once a week and that’s also much easier to manage — hair dries quicker, etc. (I saw a reply saying it was better to have it tied back at school because of nits; fwiw, my daughter’s not had nits since having it cut shorter — although she’s in KS2, so I think nits possibly less of an issue by that age?)

You shouldn’t be brushing curly hair. Learn how to look after it and then it won’t be a tangled mess.

I love how on MN there are only two hairstyles for little girls; waist length or a bob. If her hair is properly curly it will look awful in a bob. Curly hair needs cutting by an experienced hairdresser.

Cut it.

With all that swimming life will be easier.

Lice can be an issue in schools when they are small and long hair is a dose if you catch them.

I think bobs are so cute on little girls and easy to manage.

She's 4. The hairdresser gets to decide, as they are not there to pin down your 4 year old child and hack lumps off because you CBA to learn how to deal with hair gently.

Is there any need for the melodramatic post. No hairdressers are pinning children down and it's cutting her hair not hacking it off in lumps.

She's 4 she doesn't care if it gets cut so why all the angst from strangers over her hair being cut.

I would cut it just long enough so it can be tied up. My neice has really curly hair and it's much more difficult to check for nits compared to my daughters. But a lot of hairdressers don't like cutting children's curly hair short.

She's 4 she doesn't care if it gets cut so why all the angst from strangers over her hair being cut.

Because some of us want people to know that it's possible to look after and maintain curly hair, and you don't have to cut it off as a solution to any problem with it. It might not work anyway; a lot of curly hair types are worse as bobs because they cling too much or just fly everywhere.

Well if she hasn’t got strong feelings either way and caring for it causes misery, get it cut. Everyone will be happier. And it’ll be cooler in the warmer months too. She will still be the same beautiful little girl whether she has a pixie cut, a bob or hair down to her ankles.

I would definitely cut it as she sounds OK with shorter hair. Long hair is a pain - my daughter had very wavy hair, wanted to keep it long (I suspect my mother was encouraging her in this) but hated having it brushed. She went short when she was 8, as she hated having to brush it herself. It was so much easier for her and I to manage and my mother survived the shock.I

My dd is 9 and at and age were she’s more aware of how she looked and loves her short bob. When I took her to an appointment at the hospital the other day the nurses were all saying how beautiful she looked and saying how nice it was to see a girl with short hair. My girl is sporty and doesn’t like faffing about drying her hair and styling it. She’s got better things to do!

I’d cut it shorter but not a Bob. Bob’s are high maintenance need haircuts regularly and are impractical with nits. Tightly plaited and sprayed with anti nut stuff kept my dd nit free all primary school. With shorter hair not tied up you see them flipping hair around and messing with clips = much more likely to get nits.

I really don't understand this passion for little girls' hair to be bottom length.

My mother made her life and mine a misery when I was younger with the washing, brushing, untangling, ponytailing or plaiting it. I hated it (despite it being a beautiful Auburn) and got it chopped off as soon as I had my own money.

Just seen it’s curly. Curls need some weight - a Bob win’t work. Look up caring for curly hair lots on instagram.

plait it

why does she go swimming so often?
will she always?
but why shouldnt she have it cut

neither of my dd ever had long hair.
i am not a big fan

Exactly. A curly Bob will be trickier to style than long hair. OP should opt for a haircut below the shoulders and use an Afro comb and curly hair products.

You don’t dry brush curly hair ever! You brush it in the shower with conditioner in, rinse and wrap in in a towel for a few minutes. Then let it dry naturally.

I’ve got very curly hair and so does one of my daughters. My mum did what you’re doing trying to dry brush my hair, she had no clue how to care for my hair having straight hair herself . Then she got fed up and had it cut very short. I never forgave her.

Also, if you have very short curly hair it will just end up like a curly ball around your head. I got teased a lot.

If your DD doesn't care, and hates de-tangling then go for the most practical - a bob sounds great.

It's great for DD to feel have the freedom do what they want with their hair and not have to stick with an overly girly, impractical style just because adults attach value to it.

She's a human being not a doll, tell those who want you to keep her hair long to bog off!

Whatever you do with it, it'll grow back, anyway!

I would cut it to just above the shoulders so you can tie it up for PE and swimming etc.

I think you’re overthinking things way too much.
Its hair and will grow back.

Stop asking her multiple times and everyone else’s opinions.
Book it in next week and just get it done.

My 4 year olds is short ( naturally)and curly, like you we swim multiple times a week. Use lots of leave in conditioner spray and give it time to work before using a tangle teaser brush.
I am about to give my own hair to the little princess trust. So if she doesn’t mind I would cut it, great thing to talk about at school and she can easily grow it again.

@Eurydice84

I can sit on my hair, the only time brushing it is an issue is when the ends need trimming, then it tangles. I'd say to get a good trim & keep it trimmed. See how that goes.

if she still hates having it brushed, get a chunk chopped off, keep it a few inches below her should blades. It's better for school options.

to avoid nits, French plaits are the best, but at the very least, ordinary plaits.