To cut DD's beautiful hair short?

[Eurydice84]

DD (4yo) has beautiful blonde hair, down to her bottom. It has lovely curls but she absolutely hates having it brushed, so the result is often a tangled mop of knots. We also go swimming two or three times a week in the pool, and despite using a swimming cap and hair masks the chlorine is not very kind to her hair. We decided to cut it in a French bob (think Amelie from the movie) and donate to the Little Princess Trust, but I am getting a lot of "oh poor her" comments. People saying it might be easier to have long hair for reception next year, as it can be tied in a ponytail? I am planning to use Alice bands and barrettes but not sure whether they are allowed at primary school?

I'd go shoulder length so it can still be tied back for school etc.

A bob will be a nightmare to get into a swimming cap.

Unnecessarily dramatic, it's a bob not a buzz cut. She is 4 she didn't ask for it to be long either so why does it only get cut into a bob if she asks for it to be shorter?

It's hair, it will grow. Right now it's causing her distress so cutting it is the sensible thing to do.

I'd cut it and use hairbands. She hates having it brushed. It's a no brainer for me

I would just cut it. Kids' heads are smaller, so their hair regrows 'faster' anyway. If you do keep it long you can minimise tangling when swimming by putting it in plaits.

If she doesn’t care then just get it cut. She’s not a doll and it would be far easier for her to look after.

Just cut it! So much easier to play. How she feels is more important than what she looks like - that's a very important lesson for girls.

Dd rocked a Julie Andrews in sound of music type page boy cut at that age, she looked soooo cool. Now a bob and fringe is girly with minimal maintence.

if she hates having it brushed, definitely have it cut shorter but doesn’t need to be very short. You seem to be making a massive thing of it though which seems unnecessary. Perhaps challenge people who make comments to reassess their perceptions of femininity and having long hair.

If she hates having it brushed get it cut to a length that is easier. I personally love short, bobbed hair on a little girl

My 5 year old asked to have her hair short for the same reason. It's now just above her shoulder so still long enough to tie in to two pigtails. She loves wearing it short, but if she wants to grow it out I'll have no problem with it.

A bob will be difficult to use a swim cap with, tbh.

Cut it just past shoulder length so it will pull up into a ponytail and be easier to get into a swim cap.

DD had a bob at primary school. It was fine. She didn't need to tie it back and hated clips and alice bands anyway. If your daughter hates having it brushed, a bob will be tons easier and she will still be beautiful.

A French bob?
God no! Just cut it to a more suitable length than giving your curly haired child a bowl cut!

Why wouldn't slice bands be allowed in school? They sell coloured ones in Tesco that go with the colour of the uniform.

My girls both had short bobs at that age. I cut in a fringe, so no real need to tie back. They just used clips for decoration.

My DD had amazing hair down to her bum, hated it being brushed, it was a twice daily battle, so we had it cut into a chin length bob. DD loved it. It looked brilliant on her and was so easy to look after. It also grew back to her waist within two years so it's far from a permanent change.

as someone with long hair, just put it in French plaits all the time. That's what we do with DD.

If she wants it down we do half and half. Half up half down so it's out of her face. There are so many in between as than cutting off long beautiful hair off to just under ear length.

If your DD hates having her hair brushed she's still going to hate having it brushed when it's short. You'll have to brush it more if it's not long enough to put in a ponytail.

Hair brushing is like teeth brushing. Unless she'll have a pixie cut she'll have to get over it!

I have a chin length bob and it’s easy enough to put up in a French or Dutch braid so I wouldn’t worry too much about not being able to put it up for reception! If she’s happy to have it cut and she hates having it brushed it sounds like the best option all round!

The idea of 'getting rid' of what sounds like Disney hair is sad, but it'll grow back and it's up to DD and you (as the adult who has to care for her hair etc). A soft bob would look lovely - I'm speaking as someone who suffered a bowl cut, but has stick-straight hair so it wasn't going to look like much else.

Many girls in my DS's primary with short cuts, I'm surprised at the amount of people saying it's not a good or nice idea!

DM did this to my DSis hair. DSis seemed not to have an opinion until her hair was in a short bob and then she screamed the house down wanting her long hair back. It was made worse by kids and grownups at school commenting on 'what happened to your beautiful hair'. I would go for a few inches and put your DDs hair in plaits for school and swimming and use a spray conditioner making it easier to comb. You can always go another stage if this doesn't work.

I’d listen to the advice here and not go for such a drastic change in case she doesn’t like it. It’s easy for a 4 year old to say she doesn’t care before she’s done it. Also, I agree with posters saying a bob is hard with a swimming cap and I haven’t cut my daughters hair so short I can’t tie it back for primary. The nit situation is a nightmare and one of the kids regularly getting them has hair “long enough for them to love it, but not long enough to tie back”. If she loves it short you can do that next time surely.

I cut my DD's hair to a short bob when she was about 3. Yes, her long hair was beautiful (it was thick, wavy and almost blond at the ends, and down past her waist), but every time I needed to wash or brush it, she absolutely hated that, and would scream blue murder and hit/kick out (NB she is NT and I was never rough with her when I brushed/washed it), and she wouldn't let me tie it back. Once it was cut into a short bob (with fringe), it was off her face, and very quick/easy to brush and keep clean and tidy. My then DH was really cross with me, but then HE wasn't the one who was being screamed/hit/kicked at!

After about a year in school, she told me she wanted long hair. I told her that in order to have long hair, she would need to deal with having it brushed, tied back and washed properly, without making a fuss and screaming blue murder. She agreed to that and grew it out. She's now 9. Her hair is long. She is happy to properly look after it :) No problems with washing/brushing/hair care/nit checks etc. Just go for it and get it done.

Then cut it short!

Pixie cut.

Short hair looks good.

Why are you fawning over loads of hair that just causes her discomfort and difficulty? Who is this hair for?

Both my DDs had bobs until they were old enough to look after it themselves. A bob is not short hair, it's a practical girl's haircut and yes, schools allow alice bands and hair clips. IMHO a bob looks much better in thin toddler hair than the long straggly haircuts many parents subject their toddler DDs to. Other parents are shockingly opinionated about hair though, I was told I was mean and strict for saying they could grow it when they could wash it and dry it themselves. Teenage DD1 now has short hair and teenage DD2 has very long hair (which I insist is tied back for school). Neither is traumatised by having to have a classic girl's haircut as a young child.

A shoulder length is ideal. Make a nice event at the hairdressers. If she's not bothered then go for practicality. It's hair it will grow again

Just cut it. Others are projecting, it’s her hair and she doesn’t want to be in pain every day. I get that.

If she hates having it brushed and she doesn't care then it's a no brainer to me. Shoulder length curly hair looks lovely anyway so I don't know why people would say "poor her"!