What is everyone doing on their phones in restaurants, that can possibly be more important than speaking to the person they have made a dinner date with??

[BeachBlondey]

I am getting irrationally annoyed by this. I see it all the time. For eg. Me and DH were at a big restaurant the other day. I could see about 16 other tables from where we were sitting. Apart for us, and two other tables, everyone was scrolling through their phones and not talking to the other people they were out to dinner with. It makes me so sad. On one table, a couple spent the whole meal on their phones, whilst their daughter, aged about 8, simply had her head face down on the table. No interaction with the child at any time. The table right next to ours had 3 people seated at it, 2 of whom scrolled continually, whilst the 3rd person stared into the distance. It's like people are physically there, but not really present. What on earth are we doing to ourselves?

It depends, some of us are fortunate enough to eat out frequently so it's not a special occasion. Sometimes we sit and chat, other times we do look at phones

Drives me mad too. Its an addiction. If I go for dinner with DH I literally tell him at the time of booking that I will only go on condition his phone is left behind or in my bag. Ridiculous that I have to, otherwise I'd rather stay home. Some silly what's app group about mon night football or something will always be more important than me. Its awful to see a child in a restaurant, I don't mind when they have eaten and parents want to have a chat and a drink but when they pull out a device on arrival then that's a different story IMO. And then turning the volume up so tables around can hear it 🙄.
I think (hope) in years to come there will be a phone off policy in restaurants and bars.

Maybe it depends on the restaurant

If I was in Nando's say with DD during a day out shopping then we'd probably waste time on our phones

If I was out somewhere for more of an occasion then I wouldn't dream of getting my phone out

Agree, talk to people. it dosent look good.

If it’s me and my husband we are defeating gyms on Pokémon go and trading Pokémon 😂

DD and I would use our phones though to text each other about any annoying people sitting near us we'd want to bitch about

Not that we've really needed to do that but we would if need be

And now we have that new advert with Kevin Bacon, where he is falling from the sky shouting "Are you ever free falling because you're out of data and you're out of control?....." FFS, nobody dies or freefalls from the sky if they can't check facebook for a few days.

I agree! Maybe enjoy your dinner and don't stress about what other people are doing.

Maybe you should have been engaging in conversation with your partner & kept your nose out of other people's business.

I work with young kids and it's a huge problem with speech and concentration, gets worse every year. At the start of the school year there are always a few that start whining or even tantruming when they see the tablets and phones that we use for work and are not allowed access to them. When I see kids in a buggy on the phone it makes me mad. It's different if a parent has to drag the toddler along to collect a child or get a bus, but when out for a walk it's tragic to see a little one not even looking at the birds or chatting to the parent.

the poster has a point though.

My phone is on the table on vibrate. My parents are ill. I've missed calls before when one of them was taken to hospital urgently. If I'm with them, it's in my bag.

@girlfriend44 - only if it affects you.

Life admin?

If out with DH we often use time out of the house to agree on where we want to go on holiday, plan trips or look up stuff in relation to the topic of discussion.

Really not a huge deal.

Often couples sit in complete silence staring at each other while out; is this any worse?

they should talk to other people when they are out then, if you have nothing to say to each other.

Maybe they've spent the whole day together interacting wholesomely, and are indulging in a bit of comfortable, non-demanding parallel play? You can enjoy someone's company without interacting constantly.

DH and I typically spend a whole day out hill walking, taking nature photos, talking, having a picnic lunch, getting stuck in bogs, helpinch each other over stiles etc. Often on those days we'll pitch up in a pub or restaurant at the end of the day, and spend a glorious peaceful hour zoning out on our phone games in the warmth and comfort. We're still together, but we're enjoying the peace and NOT interacting for a bit. This is also very common and perfectly healthy behaviour for people with autism and other social communication conditions.

Mind your own bloody business.

There is no 'should' for most things in life. Stop trying to make up rules and just let people live their life how they want to.

It's like their phones are part of their anatomy

I think that's the idea, smart phones are the precurser to the technology that will eventually see devices implanted directly into our cerebral cortex - this is the warmup! NanoAI is also coming soon.

Yes, my DH does that too. If we're eg trying to remember the capital city of a country, he whips out of his phone instead for an instant answer, whereas I would prefer to chat about what it might be, have we been there etc. I think it kills off conversation
I like your DH's approach. Now we have the option of finding a quick fact, I find myself frustrated playing a guessing game.

One of my relatives pauses mid conversation if they're not sure of a quick fact, usually not one directly relevant to the conversation, and then there's an awkward amount of "oh was it this, hmm no or that.. I'm sure David down the grocer's mentioned it the other day..." and it drives me mad. Either look it up and we can move on, or move on because it's not a central part of the story. If we're really unlucky it turns into an anecdote about people i don't know, have never met, but relative is sure I've met.

I hate people being engrossed on their phone the whole time though (rather than using it to illustrate part of the conversation e.g look what I saw, I thought it would make a nice holiday destination).

You were the only other person on the bus, weren’t you?

There were issues with my ex that I wanted to discuss. I organised childcare and booked a table at a quiet pub/restaurant in the hope we could chat through things and look at how to save the marriage.

I spent most of the meal sitting in silence as it was a crucial time on his virtual farm and several people "needed" him on Twitter.

That was a turning point in me getting help to leave.

What has it got to do with you what strangers are doing on their phones?
I can't imagine being angered about something that is absolutely nothing to do with me.

YANBU OP, it can't always be something important.

And no it doesn't have anything to do with you but that doesn't mean you can't discuss it here 🙄

I typed out a post similar to this and lost it. It's nobody else's business what other people do with their phones.

Not just in restaurants. In cars too.

People are so often obviously looking at their phones while driving. Basically it’s an addiction.