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Original poster

Blamed for something at work that's not my fault

295 replies

kangaroopelicanartic · 14/05/2023 15:18

I work in a private house as a housekeeper to an older couple. They have no young children but have grandchildren who visit very often. The oldest is 8, the youngest 18mo. I work Mon-Fri and have worked for the family for nearly four years.

Last Wed when I went in, I noticed a bottle of bleach in the cupboard under the sink in the utility room that didn't have a cap. I put it on the shelf on the wall where the kids can't reach it and told the lady I'd moved it because I didn't think it was safe to have an open bottle of bleach where the children could reach it. I moved it again on Thur and Fri and again said why to both of them.

I've just had an angry phone call because the littlest grand child found the bleach and tipped it all over herself. She's not hurt (thank god!!!) but it has ruined her clothes along with her mum's.

The family want me to pay to replace them. Both of them are denying that I'd warned them about the bottle and moved it out of reach multiple times. They're Boden clothes and there's no way I can afford to replace them. No one is believing me when I said I'd moved the bleach multiple times. The husband actually said "we know it's your fault so just stop lying."

I'm absolutely devastated because it's always been a good place to work and in general I really like the family. Now i feel like I can't stay because the trust is broken. I just don't know what to do!

OP posts:
Pinkrinse · 15/05/2023 22:54

Placemarking for update 🙄

EpicChaos · 15/05/2023 22:55

I was joking btw :-)

Nonetheless, it would be nice to know the rest of the story and whether the OP will stop working for the people, i wouldn't work for them again, despite the apology. Hopefully OP will return soon and tell us everything.

Original poster
kangaroopelicanartic · 15/05/2023 22:56

So sorry for leaving it so long - i sat down with a cuppa after i got the kids to bed and fell asleep myself.

The full story-

I went today at my normal time, with a letter as many of you suggested. Had my phone on in my pocket recording, just in case.

They (the husband and wife) were just finishing breakfast when I went into the kitchen. Their youngest son was with them too.

I told them that I couldn't stay, because they were blaming me for something that I hadn't done, and i simply didn't feel comfortable working in their home.

They all immediately looked very uncomfortable. The husband was like "Don't be hasty, we need you. We accept that you didn't do anything wrong."

I'm thinking "WTF, that's not what you said when you were yelling down the phone at me." but didn't say anything else, just said again that after everything i didn't feel comfortable working there any longer.

Anyway, the son is looking more and more uncomfortable while we're talking, wasn't looking at me, that sort of thing, then he blurts out that he'd been moving the fucking bleach back.

Ay that point, i was like, ya know what, I'm done. I said I'd think about staying, got my stuff and left.

I'm going to speak to another family tomorrow who are looking for a housekeeper and go from there because even after the apology i don't think i'd be comfortable there - I'd be worried about it happening again! (Well, something happening and them blaming me)

OP posts:
Tellmeimcrazy · 15/05/2023 22:58

Just leave. If they are worried about the clothes let them take you to court. They won't have a leg to stand on. You weren't even present at the time.

billy1966 · 15/05/2023 22:59

They are awful.

Good luck with a new job.

Tellmeimcrazy · 15/05/2023 23:00

Just saw your update I posted hastily. Good luck for your interview. You'll find something better x

AncoraAmarena · 15/05/2023 23:01

So they did actually apologise? Because sounds like they didn't try hard, if they did.

What did the son say? WHY was he moving it back, for a laugh? Was it his children who got covered in bleach?

How very bizarre and entitled of them. Why didn't they ring you and apologise as soon as they knew it wasn't your fault? They sound awful, I'd definitely look for another job if it were me.

ladydimitrescu · 15/05/2023 23:08

They should be bloody grovelling and mortified after their behaviour. You'll find better people to work for op!

AnyaMarx · 15/05/2023 23:14

I'd just say thank you for the apology but in this type of intimate workplace relationship trust means everything and that's now gone .

Good luck with the new position. Hope you nail it and teach them a valuable lesson in not jumping to conclusions and abusing an employee on their day off !

cstaff · 15/05/2023 23:14

Did they even apologise and admit to what happened.

Best of luck finding a new job.

angelikacpickles · 15/05/2023 23:18

It doesn't sound like they actually apologised for accusing you of lying or anything else. Just basically admitted you were right. I can see why you would still want to leave.

Eurodiva · 15/05/2023 23:20

So they didn’t actually apologise…definitely get another job !

Womencanlift · 15/05/2023 23:30

Agree with others go for the interview and if they offer it then take it and don’t look back

Why was the son moving it back? Was he trying to get you into trouble? Regardless they have shown their true colours around what they think of their help. Go and work for people that value what you do for them

NameChangeNumber359 · 15/05/2023 23:34

Not only did they wrongly accuse you of putting the bottle somewhere unsafe, they denied all knowledge of you repeatedly telling them about it in the first place. So they're liars as well as fucking idiots. I hope it works out with the other family tomorrow.

toin · 15/05/2023 23:46

You deserve better than this. Life is to short to spend it with people like that.

Good luck with your next job

whynotwhatknot · 15/05/2023 23:49

Yeah that wasnt an apology

they jumped straight to blaming you till their son confessed then felt stupid

Beeswood · 16/05/2023 00:04

The husband actually said "we know it's your fault so just stop lying."

I think this quote you gave sums up why you should leave. Their 'apology' was pathetic.

I wish you luck for your interview, they will regret the way they treated you.

MCOut · 16/05/2023 00:07

I’m so glad that you were vindicated OP. It was a really unfair situation and it’s so understandable you’d rather move on. Good luck with the interview xx

Ottersmith · 16/05/2023 03:35

Is this real? Is it the 1890s? Are there many posts for housekeepers nowadays?

Fraaahnces · 16/05/2023 04:10

And they didn’t ring and apologize when they found out? They left you dangling with that kind of anxiety for several days when a simple phone call would have sorted that out fairly easily. Bastards. (Melodramatic bastards!)

RachaelN · 16/05/2023 05:27

Well I just read all these updates and good for you for standing your ground.
Good luck moving on and finding a decent new employer.
If they were happy to throw you under the bus and yell at you then they absolutely no respect for you at all.

CabernetSauvignon · 16/05/2023 07:26

If they had any decency they would have phoned you as soon as they found out the truth to stop you worrying.

gogogoji · 16/05/2023 07:35

Ottersmith · 16/05/2023 03:35

Is this real? Is it the 1890s? Are there many posts for housekeepers nowadays?

Yes of course. There are more wealthy people than ever before. Also time poor well paid professionals. If you can afford it, outsourcing the drudgery makes sense if you are short on time

Newestname002 · 16/05/2023 08:23

@kangaroopelicanartic

Sorry you've been thrown under the bus like this: you certainly didn't deserve to be treated this way and they've certainly shot themselves in the foot. Especially the lying husband who knew he was the problem and not you.

I saw this:

But i had a massive apology from both of them and have it on video that it wasn't my fault.

Do they have videos throughout the house monitoring you and whoever is there? Who saw the video - I'm guessing the grandparents saw it and knew their son lied and then blamed you...

Whatever - you're better out of that house as you could never be able to relax again. Hope the next job works out - you might even be able to charge a bit more per hour... good luck! 🌹

Puzzledandpissedoff · 16/05/2023 08:41

So where's the apology in that?
"We need you" is in their interests rather than yours, and hardly cancels out "we know it's your fault so just stop lying", so overall you're doing the right thing not to go back

Good luck with a new job too ...