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Blamed for something at work that's not my fault

295 replies

kangaroopelicanartic · 14/05/2023 15:18

I work in a private house as a housekeeper to an older couple. They have no young children but have grandchildren who visit very often. The oldest is 8, the youngest 18mo. I work Mon-Fri and have worked for the family for nearly four years.

Last Wed when I went in, I noticed a bottle of bleach in the cupboard under the sink in the utility room that didn't have a cap. I put it on the shelf on the wall where the kids can't reach it and told the lady I'd moved it because I didn't think it was safe to have an open bottle of bleach where the children could reach it. I moved it again on Thur and Fri and again said why to both of them.

I've just had an angry phone call because the littlest grand child found the bleach and tipped it all over herself. She's not hurt (thank god!!!) but it has ruined her clothes along with her mum's.

The family want me to pay to replace them. Both of them are denying that I'd warned them about the bottle and moved it out of reach multiple times. They're Boden clothes and there's no way I can afford to replace them. No one is believing me when I said I'd moved the bleach multiple times. The husband actually said "we know it's your fault so just stop lying."

I'm absolutely devastated because it's always been a good place to work and in general I really like the family. Now i feel like I can't stay because the trust is broken. I just don't know what to do!

OP posts:
Motnight · 14/05/2023 15:23

That is horrible. Stand your ground, and look for another job.

kangaroopelicanartic · 14/05/2023 15:24

Thanks. I'm honestly feeling pretty low atm over it. I wish I'd just chucked the bottle out!

OP posts:
Lovemylittlebear · 14/05/2023 15:25

Horrible people. Hope you are ok x

growgrowinggrown · 14/05/2023 15:27

Do you work for yourself or through an agency?

If definitely have to leave after how they spoke to you, shows what they really think deep down.

I'd let them know that as it wasn't your fault you won't be paying and they've soured your relationship so won't be returning either.

I understand you feel down about it now, but you'll feel a million times better advocating for yourself and not taking the nastiness from them.

gettingoldisshit · 14/05/2023 15:28

I would remind them its actually their fault for failing to supervise a small child properly.

kangaroopelicanartic · 14/05/2023 15:29

I feel so betrayed by it. Is that stupid? I can't believe they blamed me when it absolutely isn't my fault. I can't even remember the last time I used bleach because I hate the stuff.

OP posts:
CaroleSinger · 14/05/2023 15:30

If you told them repeatedly then it's not your fault but how did the smallest one get hold of it if you had already put it out of reach? Who put it back where she could reach it? That's the person to blame. Don't buy new clothes and tell them you won't be returning after being treated so badly.

mainsfed · 14/05/2023 15:30

I put it on the shelf on the wall where the kids can't reach it and told the lady I'd moved it because I didn't think it was safe to have an open bottle of bleach where the children could reach it. I moved it again on Thur and Fri and again said why to both of them.

Who is the ‘lady’? The employer or the employer’s daughter?

It’s their bleach, their clothes, their grandchildren, their house, so it’s their fault.

I think an open bottle of bleach is a hazard, and I would have thrown it away due to the danger to the kids, but that’s in my own home. I appreciate that as it’s their property, the most you could do is warn them.

They have shown their true colours.

kangaroopelicanartic · 14/05/2023 15:31

growgrowinggrown · 14/05/2023 15:27

Do you work for yourself or through an agency?

If definitely have to leave after how they spoke to you, shows what they really think deep down.

I'd let them know that as it wasn't your fault you won't be paying and they've soured your relationship so won't be returning either.

I understand you feel down about it now, but you'll feel a million times better advocating for yourself and not taking the nastiness from them.

I'm employed directly by them. No matter what I said they just kept putting the blame on me and insisting i have to replace the clothing. (which looks like it'll be £70+)

I'm not replacing it but i just wish they'd believe me!

OP posts:
TinyPurpleFishes · 14/05/2023 15:31

Bastards. Ask them who was supervising the 18 month old child playing in the utility room that contains bottles of bleach and other chemicals…

determinedtomakethiswork · 14/05/2023 15:32

So you were moving it and they were moving it back?

Scottishskifun · 14/05/2023 15:32

Send it in a text message if it's easier but state the facts and stand your ground. State you will not be replacing any clothes as it is not your responsibility to do so and you warned them on x y and z occasions about it. You are glad that their GD has not suffered any chemical burns and suggest that they store chemicals of household products in a different location or in a lockable cupboard

mainsfed · 14/05/2023 15:32

Are you paid in advance? Do you have a contract?

People like this will avoid paying you.

kangaroopelicanartic · 14/05/2023 15:33

mainsfed · 14/05/2023 15:30

I put it on the shelf on the wall where the kids can't reach it and told the lady I'd moved it because I didn't think it was safe to have an open bottle of bleach where the children could reach it. I moved it again on Thur and Fri and again said why to both of them.

Who is the ‘lady’? The employer or the employer’s daughter?

It’s their bleach, their clothes, their grandchildren, their house, so it’s their fault.

I think an open bottle of bleach is a hazard, and I would have thrown it away due to the danger to the kids, but that’s in my own home. I appreciate that as it’s their property, the most you could do is warn them.

They have shown their true colours.

The lady is the homeowner and the LO's gran.

I really wish i had thrown it away! But it was a big bottle and full so it seemed like a real waste which is why i just moved it.

OP posts:
determinedtomakethiswork · 14/05/2023 15:33

They were not supervising the child. I think it's time for you to go as there's no trust between you at all. I'm really sorry for you. If it's as you say, then they are completely to blame.

kangaroopelicanartic · 14/05/2023 15:34

determinedtomakethiswork · 14/05/2023 15:32

So you were moving it and they were moving it back?

Yes - I'd put it on the shelf in the utility room and then the next day it would be back under the sink.

OP posts:
kangaroopelicanartic · 14/05/2023 15:35

mainsfed · 14/05/2023 15:32

Are you paid in advance? Do you have a contract?

People like this will avoid paying you.

I get paid every friday so am paid up to date thank god!

OP posts:
MyNewWittyUserName · 14/05/2023 15:35

If you moved it three times, how did the kid get hold of it?

Scottishskifun · 14/05/2023 15:35

kangaroopelicanartic · 14/05/2023 15:31

I'm employed directly by them. No matter what I said they just kept putting the blame on me and insisting i have to replace the clothing. (which looks like it'll be £70+)

I'm not replacing it but i just wish they'd believe me!

They are not believing you because they are the guilty party and don't want to admit they put their gd at risk!

OnlyFannys · 14/05/2023 15:36

Are you financially in a position to walk away and not return? Because I absolutely would so that if possible

kangaroopelicanartic · 14/05/2023 15:36

determinedtomakethiswork · 14/05/2023 15:33

They were not supervising the child. I think it's time for you to go as there's no trust between you at all. I'm really sorry for you. If it's as you say, then they are completely to blame.

I honestly do not know how I'm going to go in tomorrow. I need to because well i need the money and I have some stuff there that I don't want to lose.

I honestly feel sick over it. 😔

OP posts:
Dixiechickonhols · 14/05/2023 15:37

I wouldn’t pay. I’d message or email setting out version like you have here.
Could they have dementia it’s very odd to blame you.

kangaroopelicanartic · 14/05/2023 15:37

MyNewWittyUserName · 14/05/2023 15:35

If you moved it three times, how did the kid get hold of it?

Because the couple kept putting it back under the sink!

OP posts:
pecantoucan · 14/05/2023 15:37

Who was supervising the little one that meant that were able to reach it!

rookiemere · 14/05/2023 15:37

What nasty people!

Accidents happen and this one wasn't even your fault. To expect your cleaner to replace two Boden outfits is ludicrous and I can't believe they are even asking this of you.

How long have you been working there?