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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

clairvoyant told me to expect pain

140 replies

Lilypad26 · 14/05/2023 02:38

I was attending a private event yesterday - in an upstairs area of a restaurant. As I came out of the loo there was a woman (not part of the party but had come upstairs from the general area of the restaurant to use the loo) stood chatting to my friend. I said hello assuming it was another guest from the party that I hadn’t met.

The new lady was crying, and said she was overcome with emotion because she could see how lovely my friends future was going to be and how someone who she’d lost was by her side. I was really taken aback as it had also let to my friend crying (she lost her husband a few years ago and mention of loss is very hard for her). My friend kept telling me to take down the new ladies number as she was brilliant, but I avoided this request when I realised she wasn’t part of the party.

When I realised it was just a random lady, I was polite but clearly eager to leave the room as it was evident both were pretty drunk. I don’t think I hid it very well that I was sceptical.

My friend then said “oh lily is getting married next week tell her if her life will be ok!” The random woman asked me to look into her eyes and although I did, I struggled to maintain eye contact as I wanted to leave.

The woman then started crying again said she was so overcome with emotion as she could see so much pain in my life. I was stood quite shocked and just said ok (whilst trying to dab my friends tears still as we were supposed to be at a happy event).

Now I’m lay awake unable to sleep as I keep thinking why would someone make this up?

I will be marrying the love of my life in 5 days and this is not what I needed to be thinking about. AIBU to still be thinking about it?

OP posts:

electriclight · 14/05/2023 10:45

What a malicious person she was. You were clearly sceptical and she set out to unsettle you. Now whenever you experience a bad time - as everyone does in life - you will think of her and think she was right. This is why I despite people who claim to be clairvoyant. They're not, they're liars and do harm.

electriclight · 14/05/2023 10:48

Loads of organisations have offered big money - millions in some cases - to any clairvoyant who can prove that they're genuine. No money ever claimed.

ExpatInSlavikLand · 14/05/2023 11:30

I've seen the same 'psychic', once at 19, once at 20.

1st time: I was going to move to the US, have 2 daughters but one would DIE, my aura was blue, and in a past life I had been an Egyptian priestess.

2nd time: I was going to move to Australia, have 2 sons and 1 daughter whom I'd have a fraught relationship with until she left home because she would be a 'difficult' person, my aura was yellow, and I had previously been a very money-orientated Victoriam gentleman in my previous life.

Oh, and my dead male relative, "Larry...? Tommy...?" (I refused to play along and reveal to her that yes, I had a great-uncle Ronnie who'd died a week before my birth!) was watching over me!

Charlatans, intuitive actors, amateur psychologists, all. Don't pay that woman any more mind.

CurlewKate · 14/05/2023 13:56

@Respberrypachouli "If you never saw any black swans it doesn’t mean they do not exist."

Agreed. But a black swan is within the bounds of logical and scientific possibility. Swans with fur, swans that can drive cars and clairvoyants aren t.

KeepOnKeepOff · 14/05/2023 13:58

Clairvoyants are con artists and cheats. Please don’t believe them x

Original poster

Lilypad26 · 14/05/2023 14:02

Thinking about the interaction in the light of day (rather than at 2am) and with all your helpful responses has definitely highlighted the utter ridiculousness of it all.

We have just had a lovely lunch to celebrate our last weekend as fiancés and won’t be giving her negativity another thought!

Thank you all for being so lovely!

OP posts:

WowIlikereallyhateyou · 14/05/2023 14:13

Ignore. I was told the love of my life would never be mine. He did become mine, funny that have now been married to him for 15 yrs! utter trash, and this was told to me by princess dianas supposedly amazing psychic. Crack on with your life, this stuff is utter tosh.

Watchthedoormat · 14/05/2023 14:25

Pretty obvious you pissed her off by not fawning over her and her 'gift' which is why she said what she did.
She sounds like a woman who is on an awful downward spiral, drinking a lot and trying to feel 'special' whilst being completely unaware of what a fool she is making of herself. She'd likely been drinking since the place opened (wasn't a weatherspoons was it?)
Pity her and look forward to your future.

SirenSays · 14/05/2023 14:31

I worked with "clairvoyants" who made it their mission to make people cry. Its easy isn't it, to say that and be correct. No one lives forever or escapes all pain.

Fairislefandango · 14/05/2023 14:43

There's obviously no such thing as a clairvoyant. There are plenty of malicious and/or deluded arseholes though. This woman was clearly one of them.

newjobnewstartihope · 14/05/2023 14:44

I saw a clairvoyant a few years back. They said they saw travel in my future. 3 years later I haven't been able to afford to leave the country

Zippedydoo123 · 14/05/2023 15:03

When younger and much more vulnerable I wasted a lot of money on supposed clairvoyants intuitive psychics and the like. I can honestly say looking back on all of them barely 10 per cent came true.

Please do not worry op.

crabbyoldappletree · 14/05/2023 15:04

Well if you decide to have children and give birth, you will be in pain....
And as others have said everyone has joy and sorrow throughout life.
But she sounds a bit, erm, well, unusual!
Enjoy your wedding, and don't give her anymore headspace.

GalileoHumpkins · 14/05/2023 15:07

She's sounds like a massive wanker to me, weeping and wailing to people she's never met before, dishing out unsoliticed 'readings'. Forget about her and her nonsense.

JulieHoney · 14/05/2023 15:11

"Life is pain, highness. Anyone telling you otherwise is selling something."

Wherethewildthymeblows · 14/05/2023 15:13

Don't know how old you are but I am guessing I am a bit older. Since marrying (perfectly happily, 30 years in) I have experienced pain in pregnancy, childbirth, parenting, also lost a few close family members, had a rough time in my 40s with peri menopause, having a bit of a rough time now with a health condition. My marriage, like any other, whilst fundamentally good, has had its ups and downs. I have had career disappointments and trials. I anticipate more pain to come: more health conditions, losing more family, pets, trials with my adult children, old age infirmities, possible death of my partner...... and so on and so on. What this 'clairvoyant' predicted for you is nothing more than a typical life.

Forget her.

CharlottenBerg · 14/05/2023 15:19

Believing as I do, that 'clairvoyance' is a load of hocus-pocus, it wouldn't have worried me over much. My grandmother, who came of a Gipsy family, took me as a baby to be pronounced over by a fortune-teller. I still have the handwritten forecast she paid for. I would be very talented musically, be rich before I was 30, marry (not become!) a doctor or lawyer, and spend a lot of time in America before I was 40. Every single one of those was false.

Catastrophejane · 14/05/2023 15:20

Happycroc · 14/05/2023 03:05

I was in hospital last month walking to the shop and a lady in a wheelchair approached and said she was excited for the arrival of our daughter, not to worry about her being our first child and that she would also be a great big sister one day. I smiled and thanked her… I had a baby boy, he’s child number 3 and very definitely our last!! DH and I had a good laugh about it!

crazy would be clairvoyants everywhere! Ignore what they said and look forward to your big day!

I also seemed to attract loads of clairvoyants in the street when I was heavily pregnant…

Cant remember what any of them said, but one did say my life was about to change 🙄

OP - I suspect the woman gave you a ‘bad’ future because you’d pissed her off! Just ignore.

whynotwhatknot · 14/05/2023 15:22

Its a con they play the numbers game of course everyones lost someone generally by tthe time theyre a adult

as for pain we will all go through that at some point aswel-she should be ashamed going up to random people sputing her shite

please ignore this

whynotwhatknot · 14/05/2023 15:37

Oh and have a great wedding day!

Catlord · 14/05/2023 15:46

Your friend's emotional reaction made her feel revered and powerful which she is clearly seeking for whatever reason. Yours didn't so she lashed out. Sound like a woman with emotional issues. I'm glad you feel more able to ignore her in the light of day.

betaglucans · 14/05/2023 15:57

she was pissed off you wouldn't look into her eyes properly and wanted to leave so made up some horrible bullshit because she was annoyed you weren't into it like your friend was. ignore ignore ignore! (And I am someone who loves all spiritual / psychic stuff most of the time!). there are so many idiots who love to wind people up. They realise there is power / control in telling people things that can potentially upset them; it's their little way of display power and had nothing to do with what she could "see" (which was made up) and just to do with her trying to upset you. She is not a nice person by the sounds of things. I've had idiots try to do this kind of thing to me before. They must be ignored. Do a small ritual, write the experience out on paper then burn the paper or throw in the bin along with the memory of her to 'clear" it out of your subconscious.

YouWonJayne · 14/05/2023 16:00

OP these people are either one of two things:

Mentally ill
Scammers

They spout totally bollocks and are unethical arseholes who shouldn’t speak to other humans this way. It makes me so angry, and it’s a ‘skill’ literally any one of us can do. I could literally say anything vague to anyone and they’d attribute to something in their life. Except I wouldn’t because I’m not mentally ill or a scammer.