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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be furious with school

209 replies

Margot78 · 10/05/2023 12:07

My child was very poorly this morning- sore throat, temperature and had been up most of last night. She had her SATs test due this morning but was zonked out so I explained to school that she was just too poorly to sit a test today. I was then bombarded with unpleasant calls from both her teacher and the headteacher demanding that I force her to come in. They implied that I didn’t care about her education and they said she would not be able to resit it and would get a zero. They just wouldn’t leave me alone. So I ended up dragging a sobbing child out of bed, forcing her to get dressed and get in the car. She took the test and then I picked her up. I know schools are under a lot of pressure but does that really excuse this kind of behaviour? Surely something is wrong with the system if this is acceptable, putting this amount of pressure on parents and children?

OP posts:
recyclemeagain · 10/05/2023 16:22

So we can ascertain that the school learned absolutely nothing from Covid then. Encouraging you to bring an ill child into school to sit with all the other kids to then take home whatever bug has been shared. How thoughtful of the school!
I'd be straight onto them in the morning and they would absolutely hear me.
Very very very glad to live in Scotland where we don't have SATS. Hope your girl is feeling better soon and don't be too hard on yourself either, yes you should've kept her home but I can understand how pressured you will have felt especially after a broken night of sleep.

TuesandThursNero · 10/05/2023 16:28

She won an attendance record last year despite you starting a thread about keeping her off for two days and wondering if you should continue to keep her off because she was still getting diarrhoea?

So the school isn’t too harsh when it comes to absence rates 🤷‍♀️

Original poster
Margot78 · 10/05/2023 16:34

cassgate · 10/05/2023 16:19

I am a year 6 TA. Trust me when I say that the head and teacher hate that they had to do this. The problem is that if a child doesn’t sit the paper on the same day as the rest of the class, the head has to apply for a timetable variation for that child. In the meantime they are not allowed contact with their class (easy to stop them mixing in school but we have no control over contact outside school). The paperwork involved and extra staffing required to allow children to sit tests in isolation is huge. Last year, we had 1 child who didn’t sit the test with the class because of illness. The situation above was explained and parent was given an option for them to sit it same day but on their own in the afternoon otherwise a timetable variation would kick in. This was a low ability child who was not likely to pass but we still had to go through the motions. Child came in the afternoon and sat the test in an office with myself and another TA observing. They sat all the other papers with the rest of the class.

Thank you for explaining. I understand that this would put immense pressure on them and I’m
certainly not denying that the logistics of it all must be a nightmare. I’m not without sympathy for schools at all. I suggested in my original message to school that she could maybe sit it in the afternoon instead as a sleep in the morning might be enough to perk her up. They told mw when they rang back that it’s basically now or never. Yes of course there are staffing issues to consider but surely it is preferable to make contingency plans in advance in cases of illness rather than putting last minute pressure on families in this way? It just doesn’t seem to be a good way of dealing with it or communicating that’s all.

OP posts:
Justalittlebitduckling · 10/05/2023 16:35

It’s all about the school and their results. It’s not about the welfare of your child. You are right to be cross.

TuesandThursNero · 10/05/2023 16:40

Would be odd if their motivation is results results results

surely you’d presume a very sick child wasn’t going to exactly bring the average result up

MrsToadflax · 10/05/2023 16:49

I would definitely write a formal complaint. To make a parent, another grown adult feel anxious, pressurised and scolded for advocating for their child is not acceptable. I'm sure it does create a bit more work with rescheduling, but a child can't help being sick. They had a duty of care which they neglected in favour of ticking a box. Please complain so no one else has to go through it. Good luck to your DC.

Crustsamongus · 10/05/2023 17:10

I take it no one saying OP was wrong to relent has ever heard of the Milgram experiment? Don't overestimate the likelihood you will resist when pressured by an authority figure.

OP, I am shocked the school behaved like this. I am a secondary teacher and we manage fine if there are no SAT scores for a particular child. We also know our children and their parents (though nowhere near as well as a primary would, I imagine) so would know if it's likely to be MH related, a pisstake or genuine illness.

TuesandThursNero · 10/05/2023 17:19

Crustsamongus · 10/05/2023 17:10

I take it no one saying OP was wrong to relent has ever heard of the Milgram experiment? Don't overestimate the likelihood you will resist when pressured by an authority figure.

OP, I am shocked the school behaved like this. I am a secondary teacher and we manage fine if there are no SAT scores for a particular child. We also know our children and their parents (though nowhere near as well as a primary would, I imagine) so would know if it's likely to be MH related, a pisstake or genuine illness.

Was that experiment involving parents and their sick child?

TuesandThursNero · 10/05/2023 17:20

It wasn’t.

it was pairing two people who didn’t know one another. So not relevant

Soapboxqueen · 10/05/2023 17:39

YouWonJayne · 10/05/2023 16:04

My DD’s school doesn’t do SATs, I’m sure she’ll be fine all the same

Show quote history

However, if for some reason your dd ended up in a state secondary, this would still apply.

melj1213 · 10/05/2023 17:43

The sats do matter for your child, unfortunately the results and the targets they lead to will be a feature of all her progress and reports throughout secondary school.

No they don't

I went to an independent school till I was 16 and didn't do SATs, my first "external" exam was my first GCSE ... I then went on and did A levels and a degree so it didn't do my progress any harm.

My DD also went to a local independent primary and now a state grammar - she didn't do SATs in Yr 6 (we moved back to the UK after the Yr 2 SATs so even if her school had done them she would have missed them) and she has not had her progress hindered. She sat an assessment when she started her primary mostly because we moved from abroad so her primary language was not English (though she was brought up bilingual as both her dad and I are English) and she had obviously not been using an English curriculum, so they needed to assess what she did/didn't know so they could support her transition.

When she went to secondary, she has gone to the local state grammar so she had to sit the 11+ anyway to get in and then the school did their own assessments at the start of yr7 to get their own base readings of ability. DD has flourished, not doing SATs has not held her back in any way, shape or form.

Gardenproud · 10/05/2023 17:46

HT here, timetable variations are simple to organise. Your child should be able to sit missed papers within the allowed window, although it is short.

ExtraOnions · 10/05/2023 17:48

SATS are not there to measure (or help) your child, they are a measure of the school (hence why they were desperate to get your child in). It was not for her benefit. High School might take a cursory glance, but thats about it.

Fandabedodgy · 10/05/2023 17:52

You should have stood your ground and kept her at home

Comefromaway · 10/05/2023 17:52

Soapboxqueen · 10/05/2023 17:39

However, if for some reason your dd ended up in a state secondary, this would still apply.

Show quote history

My son did end up in a state secondary and all was fine.

GalileoHumpkins · 10/05/2023 17:53

TuesandThursNero · 10/05/2023 15:44

Did you ever say what your child’s absence rate is?

Why are you so agressively badgering the OP for answers?

SquashAndPineapple · 10/05/2023 17:54

This whole pressure to take your kid in unwell really stresses me out. I really don't want my DC catching nasty bugs from others who come in ill. A cold - fine. A temperature and unable to get out of bed? Kid should stay home and school should be on board with that!

SoTired12 · 10/05/2023 17:55

I would have politely told them to 'piss off' as soon as they started to demand I bring my poorly child in, then I would have ignored all further calls.

YANBU

Fandabedodgy · 10/05/2023 17:55

Fandabedodgy · 10/05/2023 17:52

You should have stood your ground and kept her at home

Sorry to add - the teachers sound appalling btw

GalileoHumpkins · 10/05/2023 17:55

*aggressively even!

GOW56 · 10/05/2023 17:56

"SATs are used for targeting setting at GCSE.

Which is in turn used to identify which children should be targeted for booster groups etc in the run up to exams "

Not in sensible secondary schools. A good school won't use a test a child did at 10 to determine target setting at 16. That makes no sense at all . They look at their actual performance at 14/15 and trial exams to determine if they need help. How can a SATs test taken at 10 determine whether a 16 year old needs extra help?

Wavescrashingonthebeach · 10/05/2023 17:58

Headteacher is a dickhead. I'd just point out official government guidance to her that anyone with any contagious illness symptoms is advised to stay at home.

cansu · 10/05/2023 18:00

I have never heard of anyone behaving like that. I actually find it hard to believe.

Soapboxqueen · 10/05/2023 18:02

Comefromaway · 10/05/2023 17:52

My son did end up in a state secondary and all was fine.

Show quote history

What from my post suggested that things wouldn't be fine?

I haven't said that your child would fail or that their world be dire consequences.

Simply agreeing with pp that SATs do have at least some impact going forward due to targeting setting and distribution of resources.

Soapboxqueen · 10/05/2023 18:06

GOW56 · 10/05/2023 17:56

"SATs are used for targeting setting at GCSE.

Which is in turn used to identify which children should be targeted for booster groups etc in the run up to exams "

Not in sensible secondary schools. A good school won't use a test a child did at 10 to determine target setting at 16. That makes no sense at all . They look at their actual performance at 14/15 and trial exams to determine if they need help. How can a SATs test taken at 10 determine whether a 16 year old needs extra help?

It's a performance indicator for schools. If child achieves x at this point, they should achieve y at that point.

They don't just pull targets out of thin air.