To be furious with school

[Margot78]

My child was very poorly this morning- sore throat, temperature and had been up most of last night. She had her SATs test due this morning but was zonked out so I explained to school that she was just too poorly to sit a test today. I was then bombarded with unpleasant calls from both her teacher and the headteacher demanding that I force her to come in. They implied that I didn’t care about her education and they said she would not be able to resit it and would get a zero. They just wouldn’t leave me alone. So I ended up dragging a sobbing child out of bed, forcing her to get dressed and get in the car. She took the test and then I picked her up. I know schools are under a lot of pressure but does that really excuse this kind of behaviour? Surely something is wrong with the system if this is acceptable, putting this amount of pressure on parents and children?

I was caught off-guard by DD's secondary school ringing me when she was off sick. I had already reported her unwell that day and they still rang me and cross-questioned me aggressively as to why she was off sick. They demanded I bring her in for the afternoon session. I refused. They rang DH and tried the same tactic with him too. He also said no, she was ill.

We made a formal complaint to her Head of Year and got an apology for the way the member of staff spoke to us.

Please ensure that the head of governors knows about this, it is an appalling way to behave.

The sats do matter for your child, unfortunately the results and the targets they lead to will be a feature of all her progress and reports throughout secondary school. I wish people would stop saying sats don’t matter, this is not really accurate.

They really do not count. Both of my children went to a private primary school who didn't do SATS. Both went onto different secondary schools where the other children had all done SATS. Dd's school did CATS testing on entry for all pupils. Both were given target grades, put into appropriate sets etc etc with no problem.

The sats do matter for your child, unfortunately the results and the targets they lead to will be a feature of all her progress and reports throughout secondary school. I wish people would stop saying sats don’t matter, this is not really accurate.

Amazing then that my child is doing A Levels at a selected 6th form and looking to achieve top grades despite not doing year 6 Sats.

At most highschools they reassess in the first few weeks.

Sats are also an appalling measure for children with learning differences, especially the SPAG assessment.

Why does it matter?

because if you were to say “oh I have a terrible relationship with the school, lots of ongoing issues and the head and teachers are all twats”

Most of us would become a touch more skeptical re your version of events

Did you ever say what your child’s absence rate is?

her form teacher rang saying angrily that this was important and she needed to come in. That they were all waiting for her to start. I said she was too sick. My daughter heard me talking to her and got stressed. Teacher asked me to see if I could get her ready and hung up.

Teacher rang back again to see if I’d managed to convince her. Told her child was distressed and still feeling hot with a sore throat. Teacher got extremely angry and said it was a shame I was going to let my child score a zero when she was good at reading. She hung up before I could respond.

Almost right away I get a call from the head demanding that I bring her in. This was followed up by another call checking she was on her way. She also demanded to speak to my daughter. She gave the strong impression she didn’t believe me. I felt quite tearful and shaky by this point tbh.

i have just reread

are you seriously saying the teacher actually out the phone down on you.
that the teacher was “extremely angry” (how so - shouting?)
and that the head “demanded”? What did she actually say? “I DEMAND your daughter comes in”?

This really is one thread where I’d be interested to hear these conversations!

Not sure how many days would make this justifiable but this is her 4th day off this academic year.

Did the teacher really put the phone down on you. Twice?

and how did her “extreme anger” manifest itself”

and how did the head actually demand your daughter come in? What language was used

Again. Context.

So if she was a school refuser and multiple times had claimed illness that was later shown or she said had been her making it up… it would put a different slant on your version

I didn’t record it unfortunately. The teacher had a very annoyed tone of voice and it was like being told off. Didn’t let me get a word in and yes the head said she “has to” come in, she repeated that several times that’s why I interpreted it as a demand as opposed to “please can you bring her in?” which would have been a request. I’m not someone who exaggerates or tries to make others sound bad. I’ve always got on fine with them that’s why this was shocking. If they had been nice and reasonable I wouldn’t have felt the need to drag her out of bed, I would have felt able to say no. The reason I (wrongly) forced her to go was because I genuinely felt harassed and pressured . I promise.

MN never ceases to amaze me in that they think a sick child should be in school no matter what

Did the teacher put the down on you twice?

Fuck what a cruel thing to do to a child!! Why not just go for a re-sit FFS

Of the 32 other pupils… are you or your daughter aware of anyone else being off sick today?

SATs are used for targeting setting at GCSE.

Which is in turn used to identify which children should be targeted for booster groups etc in the run up to exams

So while not the most important thing to think about before taking SATs, it's incorrect to say it has no impact.

Unfortunately they probably had multiple parents saying the same and can't tell who is genuinely ill, plus minor illnesses used to be something we just carried on with.

SATs are completely irrelevant except for the school.

I'd make a formal BBC complaint to the Board of Governors about their bullying, and I would have let her sleep.

My DD’s school doesn’t do SATs, I’m sure she’ll be fine all the same

No where does this poster say she forced or made her DD do this.

if I’d spent weeks / months revising and I knew the alternative was resits when all my friends would be moving on and getting their results… damn right I would have done the exams with tonsillitis!

For what it's worth OP, I would have felt and done exactly the same as you did.

It was wrong of them to pressure you like that in those circumstances.
They may realise that now having seen your daughter perform her test in tears and clearly unwell.
Tonsillitis can make anyone feel rotten.

I am a year 6 TA. Trust me when I say that the head and teacher hate that they had to do this. The problem is that if a child doesn’t sit the paper on the same day as the rest of the class, the head has to apply for a timetable variation for that child. In the meantime they are not allowed contact with their class (easy to stop them mixing in school but we have no control over contact outside school). The paperwork involved and extra staffing required to allow children to sit tests in isolation is huge. Last year, we had 1 child who didn’t sit the test with the class because of illness. The situation above was explained and parent was given an option for them to sit it same day but on their own in the afternoon otherwise a timetable variation would kick in. This was a low ability child who was not likely to pass but we still had to go through the motions. Child came in the afternoon and sat the test in an office with myself and another TA observing. They sat all the other papers with the rest of the class.

I am a year 6 TA. Trust me when I say that the head and teacher hate that they had to do this.

If it happened as OP describes then they did not have to do it like that.

Sorry OP school are ridiculous to do this. I'm going to assume your DD is expected to do well and school want her to perform in order to optimise their average scores.

Well they deserve to have egg on their faces if a sick child doesn't magically achieve the required scores. Meanwhile your DD will be just fine at secondary who will assess her and set her accordingly.

I'm raging as much at their stupidity as their cruelty towards your DD. The best option for school and your DD is for her to resit when she is well enough.

I hope she is feeling better soon.