To wonder who decided that customers want small talk at the till in a shop?

[YouWonJayne]

Seriously I want to know their names. Which suits sat in a boardroom and said “Do you know what customers really want? When they’re stressed and frazzled trying the find a plain black shirt and black skirt for a 9 year old’s school play, which BTW are nigh-on impossible to find, when they get to the till they want the assistant to ask what they’re up to this morning and if they’re busy? That will keep customers happy!”

The poor girl on the checkout was trying her best not to look bored as she asked the woman in front of me “Have you got much planned this morning? Do you have a busy day” especially when the woman have details of all the wedding outfits she needed to buy for her grandchildren.

I hope the assistant was relieved when I just gave a “No” when she asked me the same. I really couldn’t be arsed.

I noticed this everywhere now. Is it just me who doesn’t actually want small talk, who just wants to buy my stuff and get on with me day without being a conversationalist extraordinaire? Don’t get me started on upselling! Or the people in Lush who pounce when you’re through the door. It’s completely insufferable.

The worst part is these poor people (probably on minimum wage) get bollocked if they don’t behave this way. I can’t imagine any of them want to behave this way.

I feel like it needs a serious platform, a campaign called Leave Shoppers Alone (half joking) 😂

It's important to me, too. I WFH full time and it's just me and my teenage son at home. He's lovely, but for my own sake I need to talk to adults. I have plenty of opportunity to do so, but there are days when popping to the shop might be the only time I see other people to talk to.
I think it's a shame.

My personal hate is talking to me when I'm having a 'relaxing' beauty treatment. I only have them on very special occasions and I want to lie in silence. No way a therapist should be talking non stop during a massage/facial.

The probably feel they have to chat to customers or they will be accused of judging the customer as not being good enough to shop there.

There was a whole thread about it on MN a few days ago.

you must be really miserable and boring.

Well you sound pleasant...

Are you also one of those people who drones on and on, in a supermarket queue when there are people waiting and the checkout operator is desperately trying to get you to pack your stuff and go because they can see people are waiting to pay?

Some people are starved of human contact and conversation and that's really sad. It doesn't though mean that supermarket checkouts are the place for long conversations. I'm not talking about the quick chats, lots of people have those and it's fine but lengthy conversations when people are waiting are just selfish.

Sometimes the cashier is just a naturally cheery person who likes to talk, they’re not always forced to make small talk. It makes their time on the tills a bit less boring.

Some people are lonely too, and have no one to talk to on a day to day basis, so they will enjoy talking to the cashier. It’ll make some people’s day

Ditto. The less interaction with random humans the better for me

What if the customer is shy and not good at starting conversation, but would still really enjoy a conversation? If people don’t want to see/talk to people, they should order online. Don’t waste time ranting about it online, there is nothing wrong with a cashier asking how someone’s day is etc

When DS was about 9, I was walking with him along a road. Someone came the other way. 'All right?' I said, and smiled. 'Hello!' and a smile came back. DS said 'Did you know that lady?'. 'No', I said. 'Then why did you speak to her?' he asked.

Small conversation doesn’t hurt. You might be socially inept and starved of positive human contact like the OP here but I’m certainly not. You’re normally the type of customer which employees will chat shit once you’ve left.

Along with being inept, chatting shit does seem to be your thing. It's not mine though so I'll leave you to it. Ick.

Well said @yourfault. So many miserable people around who can't even pass the time of day with another human being.
I'd much rather be around cheerful people.
Misery breeds misery.

I have left Superdrug recently to, one member of staff was slowly working her way though the perfumes for an elderly couple whilst 8 of us stood queuing.
Someone went and looked for another staff member but nothing doing. The assistant doing the perfume sniffing didn't even speed up a bit!
I also hate the " do you want a packet of wipes/polos/body spray" shit at the till.
Our local garage has also started with the " do you want to donate this soon to be out of date packet of sweets to the food bank for a pound"
I find Sainsburys is the worst for "have you got anything planned for today" "ooh my cat likes this brand" "these t-shirts are lovely aren't they great colour" arghhhhh

I don’t mind the small talk at a till,it’s generally a quick exchange..but I hate it at hair dressers or if getting a facial..

It is historical, because in the past you could not go into a shop without speaking to the staff. You had to ask for what you wanted to buy. The same applied if you were shopping at a market. Self service shopping did not exist.

Before huge supermarkets were built you had to shop in individual shops like; the bakery, green grocers, butchers, chemist, newsagents, fish mongers, sweet shops, tobacconists, iron mongers, clothes & pet shops, post office etc

Some shops used to close on a Wednesday afternoon & open on a Saturday morning. 99% of shops were closed on a Sunday

I believe some countries have created special shopping tills where you can queue if you wish to have a long conversation.

I agree that some people are socially isolated & their local shop may be their only contact.

I like it. It's nice to have some human interaction. I hate how so many stores are now self service or pushing you to go online. What's wrong with a hello and a smile. Humans are social animals, except some weirdos on here!

Threads like this one make me so grateful I don't live in the UK!! What a miserable bunch you are.

We aren't all like that. I know the names, life stories, weights, etc, of several of the staff at my local Marks & Spencer, various neighbours, random people on buses and trains here and in Europe.

I do know that you are not all like that. However, I do sometimes think that a large chunk of people on MN are actually socially inept and are on here because they can't relate to ordinary people in real life.

Well that is probably true anywhere online during daylight hours.

it needs a serious platform, a campaign called Leave Shoppers Alone

I misread the op and thought this was a real campaign, I was about to start googling to see how I could add my name to the petition! Argh. It should be

@Aslanplustwo - I do sometimes think that a large chunk of people on MN are actually socially inept and are on here because they can't relate to ordinary people in real life.

That is one of the most abundantly clear things about Mumsnet.

But you don't have to engage if you don't want to, my sainsburys is so friendly and you especially see elderly people really having a good chat, could be the only one they've had that week.
I am a real chatter box, plus retired, so I never mind.
I went to a lovely little seaside town yesterday with a friend, and all the small independent shops were like that, they seemed genuine and for us, it gave the town a real positive vibe.

But you don't have to engage if you don't want to

That's not really the case in many places. They follow you around until you either give in and talk to them, or leave.

I used to work somewhere that made us talk to customers, even reluctant ones. You had to greet within a minute of a customer entering the store (ideally within 30 seconds) and speak to them again within another two minutes if they hadn't approached you first.

As a customer I know staff don't have a choice but that doesn't make me feel any less uncomfortable with being constantly approached while I'm just trying to shop in peace.

This thread makes me feel so, so sad.