To wonder who decided that customers want small talk at the till in a shop?

[YouWonJayne]

Seriously I want to know their names. Which suits sat in a boardroom and said “Do you know what customers really want? When they’re stressed and frazzled trying the find a plain black shirt and black skirt for a 9 year old’s school play, which BTW are nigh-on impossible to find, when they get to the till they want the assistant to ask what they’re up to this morning and if they’re busy? That will keep customers happy!”

The poor girl on the checkout was trying her best not to look bored as she asked the woman in front of me “Have you got much planned this morning? Do you have a busy day” especially when the woman have details of all the wedding outfits she needed to buy for her grandchildren.

I hope the assistant was relieved when I just gave a “No” when she asked me the same. I really couldn’t be arsed.

I noticed this everywhere now. Is it just me who doesn’t actually want small talk, who just wants to buy my stuff and get on with me day without being a conversationalist extraordinaire? Don’t get me started on upselling! Or the people in Lush who pounce when you’re through the door. It’s completely insufferable.

The worst part is these poor people (probably on minimum wage) get bollocked if they don’t behave this way. I can’t imagine any of them want to behave this way.

I feel like it needs a serious platform, a campaign called Leave Shoppers Alone (half joking) 😂

You need one of these, OP
Don't Talk To Me Distressed Sarcastic Funny Introvert T-Shirt https://amzn.eu/d/egRCKMA

I am a mystery shopper. One of the most common things which is asked for is to note upselling - so in a restaurant they might ask you just to order a burger and see whether they offer salad/fries, or to ask for just a "coffee" to see if they try to sell you a larger one. Also managers want feedback on interaction with staff, has to go beyond the robotic and should be tailored to each customer.

Some staff do this very well. Other staff just say "anything planned for the rest of the day then" and don't even listen to the response.

I love a little chat at the checkout. Mind you, it's not exactly small talk between me and Saturday night Aldi lady, we know each others deepest darkest secrets! I used to get most of my shopping at Sainsbury's but since they got the self scanners in I just rush round with a basket and out, saving my time and enjoyment for Saturday night Aldi lady.

I went to a new local coffee shop the other day, it was at a quiet time and I ended up having a lovely chat with the owner about her plans for the place. I practise my Italian with the staff when shopping at the local Italian deli.

It all depends, massively. If I’m feeling less sociable or in a hurry I’ll go somewhere more crowded & anonymous & then probably would be less inclined to chat beyond ‘yes, fine thanks.’

Just got back from a short break in Yorkshire. Couldn't believe how nice the retail staff were almost everywhere. When you went in somewhere, usually a smile and simple "hello" from one of the staff, or a cheery, "let me know if you need any help", and then they'd carry on what they were doing. No pressure, no hassle. Same in dept stores (M&S, Next etc) and fast food (Burger King, McDonalds). They'd do their job, quietly and efficiently, minimal small talk, but "opening the door" to more if you wanted it. It felt like a different planet rather than a different county, compared to our city centre robots who either ignore/blank you or want an in-depth conversation. Perhaps the rest of the country need to send their staff on customer service training courses to Yorkshire!

The thing is, we bought so much more when we were less anxious and more at ease. We've come back with all kinds of things, just because we were allowed to walk round shops/attractions without hassle, and a few times, we went back to the same shops because the staff were so "normal" to us, i.e. in one case, there was something we saw in the shop and would have liked a slightly different version, so we went back the next day to ask them if they had what we wanted or whether they could get it - same guy in the shop who'd been friendly, but not over-friendly, and he couldn't have been more helpful to help us find exactly what we wanted, which it turned out, he didn't have but he phoned a different shop (not linked, another independent) in a different town to see if they had one - they did and they held it for us, the first guy give us directions and even drew us a map and told us where to park at the other town. That's true customer service - it's not hard, but so many staff just aren't helpful and ignore you, or go too far the other way and won't leave you alone.

Interesting that you even noticed a difference in chains, User.
I am in Yorkshire and agree there is some outstanding service in shops. Dh and I like to collect examples of ‘Yorkshire down selling’: ‘You don’t want to pay that! Go down the road, heʼs got it for half the price.’ My favourite is the man in the hardware shop who offered to bring in his own tape measure for me to plan my garden rather than sell me the one he had in stock that he thought was overpriced. But my friend beats that with the man in the garden centre who lent her his van to take the manure she had bought home.

My elderly mum lives alone and when she goes to the supermarket, will try to pick the same cashier each time as she says they have a chat. She appreciates the contact.

Where I used to live had the choice of two corner shops. One where they were friendly and jolly and remembered everyone’s names, joked around, acknowledged children, etc. The other shop was the total opposite- no communication at all. You barely exist to them.

Surprisingly there were many times I chose the “rude”shop over the nicer one, simply because I just couldn’t be bothered with it all and wanted to just nip in and out minding my own business.

Shame you didn't have a third shop that understood the "middle ground". I'd be the same to be honest, and would try to avoid the "over-friendly" one as I prefer to be anonymous.

I cannot stand the small talk, upwelling, asking if you are looking for anything in particular, being approached by staff within seconds of entering a shop.

Small talk at the tills tends to hold up the queue so would be better to have a rule that if there is someone else waiting behind the customer currently being served, then no small talk.

Upselling drives me crazy, have answered a fair few times with “if I wanted “item”, I’d have already picked it up or asked for it”.

Had a situation recently where within the same day, I walked out of multiple shops within less than 5 minutes due to being approached by multiple members of staff asking if I needed help. I had barely crossed the doorway into the shop before they started so hadn’t even had chance to look at anything. In one shop, I timed it and 6 different staff members asked me within 3 minutes if they could assist with what I was looking for. SCS are one of the worst, they stand in a group at the door, seem to all converge on you as you walk in then one will follow you at a distance making comments about anything you even slightly pause to look at.

it’s a much nicer experience if you can just look around in peace and then head to a specific area to ask for help when ready.

Completely agree I use self service tills whenever possible I don’t have any desire to talk to strangers about bullshit mundane crap that neither I or they have any interest in

I find this quite sad to read. Interacting with strangers is part of being out in society - you know, just talking to other humans.

Not every interaction has to be interesting, it can just be polite.
Staff are probably trained not to comment on anything which a customer might construe as invasive (e.g. that's a nice coat) so have to keep it mundane (e.g. it's nice to see the sun out).

There were 0 cashiers when I went to Sainsbury's yesterday. One member of staff on the SS. I had to call her over three times - alcohol approval, when my pick and mix came up as £11.45 (it was 7 chocolate mice) and when the money off voucher got stuck in the slot.
Each time I had to wait. I could have been through a manned till in about 1/3 of the time.
Apparently they'd had a power cut which had mucked things up. Why they didn't think it wise to put more staff on to cope I don't know. I suppose there aren't any.

@TheOrigRights She goes to the large supermarket where there are always a few cashiers. Agree the smaller shops now are often totally self service and I try to avoid them myself.

I used to work in a supermarket whilst at uni. A lady used to come in multiple times a day and come to my checkout. After many months and visits she told me that she loved our chats and that I was the only person she got to talk to.
You might not enjoy it but for her it mattered. I've never forgotten her or what she did.

Is it Jones shoes. I bought some lovely boots in their branch in Bath after Christmas. They are suede so I agreed to pay for scotchguarding in their special machine . She tried to upsell me a brush ( no thank you I've got several) a special spray ( repeat the no) a touch up dye because ,even though I had a black suede dye , there are lots of shades of black and mine wouldn't match ( repeat the no). I had been looking for this type of boot for ages to replace a worn out pair. If I hadn't been glad to find them I might have just left it. It really was a bit much.
I did leave another expensive shoe shop. many years ago. I chose a pair of boots . When I went to the till to pay the assistant quoted a price £20.00 higher. When I queried she said she had added special Polish and a protection spray into the bag because I would need them. Presumably I was supposed to be terribly polite and accept it. I was so stunned at the sheer balls of her that I just said no and walked out without anything.

There's an easy way around that - for the shop assistant to react to the customer. If the customer starts talking, the shop assistant can respond.

Otherwise "that will be £x please" and a "thank you and have a good day" at the end is sufficient.

Anyway, despite what people said on the self-service thread, in most cases, if you can get to a supermarket, you can get to other places where you can talk and engage with people - libraries, organised events, markets, U3A, sports clubs, the list goes on.

As for upselling, nobody on MN appears to work at the HQ of a retailer, as nobody has ever come on here to explain why they insist on it. I assume people actually do say yes to the products from time to time, but I've never seen anyone do it!

As a person on the till, you get to know who is up for it and who isn't. You get to learn how to shut people down who won't shut up despite the long queue behind them. And you don't always get it right. Or you're dealing with your own stuff.

Get over it.

💗

Agree with this 💯

I was in my local Spar a few months ago and plonked my newspaper down on the counter. The front page had a big picture of Boris Johnson. The till lady took one look at it, and before she could help herself, blurted out 'Fucking wanker!'. The she recollected herself and said 'I'm so sorry!' I was very happy to assure her that she had only said what I was thinking. We had a nice five minute chat about all sorts of things. I love moments like that.

I love to have a little chat and a moment of connection. It lifts my mood.

I had a Saturday job in Stead and Simpsons (RIP) in the 80s. Upselling was a massive part of the job.
Most customers were aware of this, and humoured the whole process.
We had really nasty plastic handbags to match the really nasty plastic shoes. Tights, brushes, shoe horns, polish. We got points on how many "additionals" we sold.

It's not a new thing.

This is a large supermarket - well large for a town, it's not one of the city ones.
There were about 15 empty checkouts.

@TheOrigRights
thats not good. Combination of lack of staff and cost cutting?
For my mother, the chat she gets is important to her, even if it’s only for a minute or two