To think our 15 year old does NOT need a bedtime.

[NotTonightDeidre]

This is a source of much disagreement in our house.

DH thinks teen should have a strict bedtime.

I do not.

He thinks I'm in the minority and that all the parents of teens around us are enforcing bedtimes on their teenage offspring (even at weekends).

I believe that most will be allowing their teens a lwcel of autonomy - especially at weekends.

Who's right? What do you do if you have teens?

My DS16 goes at 10-10.30 on school nights and 11.30-12 on weekends. I think it's reasonable to have time limits as they will push it otherwise. School recommends it too.

We didn’t have a set bedtime from when they started secondary. As long as they got up and had all their kit ready for their very early school bus they proved themselves responsible. Oddly they would self regulate and take themselves off to bed quite sensibly but neither did it freak us out if they were up after us. It’s about trusting them to behave like an adult if you want to be treated like one.

At that age he needs to be learning to self regulate. My rules for my 3 when they were in high school were that phones had to be downstairs charging by 10:30, and they had to be in their rooms, but provided they were quiet it was their choice whether or not to be in bed. Had to be up at 7 for school with no complaints. I think having boundaries like this without enforcing a strict bedtime was a good compromise.

Lights out by 10pm on a school night until GCSEs are over here, they both had to be up for 6-6:15am. TBH they would normally put themselves to bed between 9 and 10, occasionally much earlier, occasionally needed reminding. In sixth form no noise after 10:30 as the rest of the house needs to get up for work.

Midnight at weekend the

DD15 has a 10.30pm
bed time in the week and can choose fri/sat eves and holidays. She’s up at 6.30am for school so does need a regular bedtime in the week. Weekends are fine as she can lie in.