Is this morally wrong?

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I am fairly good friends with a guy, our kids play together and I go out at work with him often (runs his own business) and we socialise once in a while and keep in touch.

He and his partner (his children's mum) split 8 years ago. My friend seems over it, they get along fine and he doesn't speak much about her, life seems to have moved on.

I was not friends with him when they were together. A few months ago his ex partner added me on instagram, I find her extremely physically attractive. One night a few weeks ago she sent me a highly sexual message, making it pretty clear she is interested in me sexually. We have messaged a bit back and forth. I asked what her ex, my friend would think about this and she replied that it's none of his business and she won't be telling. We have been planning when to meet.

I really want to, and I know it's a purely sexual thing. That's all I want and the way she is presenting it, it seems to be all she wants. Nothing relationship wise will come of it, so I suppose there's no risk of anyone finding out.

I just feel like I'm doing something wrong but then I think well he has slept with others and had other girlfriends since they split. He is over her, it was 8 years ago.

If I do this is it okay? Or morally, even if he is over her, is it wrong?

If you are a real friend, you won't want to hurt your friend - therefore the only way to be sure it's ok it to ask if they are ok with it.

If you won't ask, then you already know it's morally wrong and are trying to persuade yourself otherwise.

You are also allowing yourself to become a 'flying monkey' - someone the ex uses to hurt your friend.

Sounds fun huh? This is what happens to people with a lack of moral compass.

If you two were deeply in love and committed to each other, that might be one thing. But you just want some casual, no-strings attached sex. Surely you can get elsewhere without involving yourself in a potentially messy situation?

Well, you’re an idiot if you think there is no connection between you being a good friend of her ex and her choosing to add you to instagram and proposition you for sex. Of course thinking this is both moral and will successfully be kept a secret from your friend forever is a load of old bollocks. If you would feel awkward mentioning this to your friend, that’s because it is a deeply stupid thing to do just for a bit of sex.

Fill your boots mate. Don’t feel bad about having fun

So, you were not friends when they were together.

At 9.45 you say it was just a random add on Instagram.

At 10.49 you say she had found you attractive for a while. How so, must be just your friends photos? or what? You say she knew you had a partner. How does she know that about you then when it was a random add?

Can we be clear as to whether you has actually met this woman who has propositioned you for sex?

You seem playing out some stuidly written scene from a film where everyboy says just don't do it and your dick says 'but I must fulfil my destiny'. 😆

That's not how ye make porridge!