I am DONE with pregnancy

[elm26]

I'm almost 37 weeks after 13 miscarriages and so grateful but today I feel like I'm losing my mind.

I had Hyperemesis from 6-33 weeks as soon as the sickness eased to only once a day, I got covid and ended up in hospital on oxygen, I got rid of that and felt great for about 5 days before pelvic girdle pain kicked in. I've been grinning and baring it but today I've finally cracked.

I'm exhausted, I'm awake from 1-6 every night, I'm in agony, my DH is working 7 day weeks at the moment so I'm quite lonely at the minute.

I've cried all day, I've really had enough.

I've tried talking to friends or female relatives about how I feel but if I hear "you think you're tired now wait until the baby is born" or "you'll forget about it and have number 2 within a couple years" once more I actually think I may commit murder.

I told my DH when he called me earlier that he can forget about ever having another one and he kind of half laughed so I put the phone down on him 🤦🏻‍♀️

I've tried to keep my head above water the whole way through, the first 16 weeks were plagued with worry I'd miscarry and sickness, second trimester I was more sick than ever and lost 2 stone and now the third trimester is so painful I don't know what to do with myself.

I'm really worried that by the time I go into labour I will be an absolute exhausted wreck and not actually make it through it. I have no strength left. I can't even pick up my dogs pop anymore because I can't bend so going for a slow walk and getting out in the fresh air isn't an option. (DH walks him when he's home instead now).

Please somebody tell me there is an end in sight because I just feel absolutely emotionally and physically done today.

Honestly I felt awful when pregnant (quite a few medical issues) and just so so anxious and stressed, it was a massive relief when my baby was born and I genuinely less tired with a newborn than when I was pregnant.
Not long to go now OP. Try to focus on your hospital bag, things you and the baby will do once they’re here etc. And if people are getting on your nerves tell them to sod off, no one is going to argue with a pregnant lady!

I hate pregnancy. I find newborns much easier then late pregnancy. I've done it twice now and that's enough!

Honestly pregnancy sucks, and if one person had told me I’ll miss it when the baby was here I think I would have decked them.

Have you spoken to your midwifery team about how you’re feeling? You could have a touch of antenatal depression. Especially after you’ve had such a tough time of it all. It might be worth speaking to them at your next appointment. Hope you feel better asap.

Sending you much love. I totally empathise I don’t find pregnancy easy either and having had multiple miscarriages including at 20 weeks I totally understand the anxiety. I’m only 10 weeks at the moment and I find people have no understanding of awful pregnancy sickness.

My only advice is to try and stay strong and concentrate on the fact you are close to goal of meeting your baby. I hope everything goes really well for you.

Omg I could have written your post! 36 weeks with horrific HG the whole way through and pelvic girdle pain 😢 it is absolutely awful! This is my second and i found the newborn stage so much easier!! Never again!

Feel free to DM if you need a moan x

@Springbuds38 thank you, Hospital bags are packed so I feel like I'm just waiting. Wish I had a crystal ball! If she's not here by 29th I'm being induced so that's a bonus x

OP I do know how you feel. I was sick as a dog throughout. My tits were so painful I'd sit and cry with bloody iced cabbage leaves on them. I'd had so many losses I couldn't enjoy my pregnancy. I didn't buy any baby stuff until 2 weeks before he was due. I felt like crap day and night.
But it does end. And then you're a mum and your world will never be the same again.
You're making a human - you're allowed to be knackered and fed up. Good luck.

@roarfeckingroarr it is not the glowy, fantastic time that people make out! I've never had bad skin, not even as a teenager, now I can't go a week without a new spot and my hair is sooo greasy 🤦🏻‍♀️ blimmin eck I don't know how anyone does it more than once x

Yup its crap.

They to remember this in a few months when you might be considering another.

No really, despite how bad it is, you really might want another.

And yup, it really is a lot more tiring once the baby arrives. I know its cliche.

But you've got this!

@Ostryga I have a history of anxiety and depression so I've been under the perinatal mental health team all the way through but apart from ringing me once a month and asking if there's anything I need support with, they can't really do much as limited regarding medications I can take etc. they have been good though in terms of keeping in touch so I can't fault them x

@TakeMe2Insanity thank you, I'm so sorry for your losses. People don't understand how debilitating it is until they've been through it themselves. It's awful. Sending you all the luck in the world for a healthy pregnancy and birth x

Oh bless you, you've had such a rough time. I second the idea of speaking to your midwife about how you're feeling, let them take care of you.

Eyes on the prize! Do you know if it's a boy or a girl?

@iLovee really sorry you're suffering too 😞 it's awful. I really hope babies make an appearance soon for us 🤞🏻 thank you, you too x

Oh you poor thing. Pregnancy is shit at the best of times and you've had an incredibly tough one. Just rest as much as you possibly can, and ignore all those idiots who aren't hearing how hard it is for you. Take it day by day and do nice things for yourself. I'm 38 weeks now and have been so much kinder to myself this pregnancy - I kept trying to carry on almost like normal with my first, but your body is working so hard, as well as your brain being in a hormonal soup that you just can't and you must take it easy. Sending you a big chocolate filled hug.

Although the newborn days are hard I think you'll actually feel much better once your LO is here.

@Gtsr443 sorry you suffered as well, I feel like I will be pregnant forever at the minute 😂 it feels never ending. Don't get me started on the boobs, my MW gave me a colostrum collecting kit, I managed 3ml then cried in pain for the next 2 days. I'm not doing that again! X

@Rowthe thank you, I feel like I don't have it but I guess I have no choice but to buckle up and get the baby out within the next month 🫠 x

@Americano75 I'm seeing MW tomorrow so will mention how bad the pain has been recently. A little girl 🥰 can't wait to have a cuddle x

Just had my second DC and it's lovely not to be pregnant, I immediately felt much better once the baby was out despite the obvious pains etc. Much prefer the tiredness of having a newborn to the suffering in pregnancy so you may well feel the same!

@NamingNames it's such a relief to know that you guys get it and understand. That's all I needed to hear was some understanding because none of the women in my life seem to have had prolonged sickness or lots of pain. I definitely need a chocolate filled hug lol. Good luck for your delivery x

@Dragonfly909 I'm really hoping that's the case! Congratulations! X

OK, you're not going to want to hear this but I am so jealous! Perimenopause does funny things to your brain. I promise you, all of this is worth it. When you're holding you're wee girl for the first time all of this will fade away.

I had SPD/pelvic girdle pain with both of my pregnancies and I’m not exaggerating when I say I was temporarily disabled. I could only hobble, not walk, and was in pain 24/7. I also had an irritable uterus and was contracting (braxton hicks that is) 24/7. Every move I made would trigger them.

As shit as that was, it isn’t a patch on what you’ve suffered. It’s utterly shit and I’m sorry you’ve had such a terrible time.

I was you. It's crap. If it makes you feel better, my HG disappeared almost immediately once the baby was born. By the time I recovered from the birth and had my first meal the nausea was gone.

I'm another one who found the early newborn stage easier than the late stage of pregnancy. You'll get there and this will all be a distant memory soon 💐

@Americano75 thank you for your kind words. Deep down I know it'll be so worth it, I can't wait to meet her and finally be a Mum after 9 years of heartache and loss. I just thought maybe I'd have an easy pregnancy after all of the trouble we had to get here but no such luck x

@Jellycats4life so sorry, it really is absolutely debilitating. Getting up from the sofa is making me cry in pain today. I've got stage 4 endometriosis and have had so many operations, D&C's etc I regarded myself quite mentally and physically strong when it comes to pain but this is something else.

My Braxton Hicks have been quite painful the past few days, really tight and make me want to hold my breath until they're over which hasn't been pleasant! X