We’ve lost sight of what is a healthy weight

[SpringPop]

Was chatting to my husband yesterday about getting to a healthy weight.

I am 5ft3 and at start of year I was weighing 80kg (12st 8)

I have hired a PT, workout 3 x weeklyand started eating healthy and now weigh around 72kg (11st 4). I’m not restricting food types or on any fad diet. I’m literally eating a balanced diet and the correct amount to lose up to 1lb a week.

I’ve done a decent start but still want to get to below 10stone where I would be a healthy weight for my height according to BMI.

I literally look like a ball in photos I took at the weekend. So fat.

He thinks I look great and lovely. Which is very kind. I literally don’t get how done people can’t see that I look fat. He’s not just being kind.

we got chatting and I Said to him that people we watch on tv that we think are “normal” (not underweight) and are similar height to me probably weigh between 8-9 stone therefore how could he not see I was overweight and not looking great.

AIBU to think no wonder we are quite an overweight nation. We equate 8stone/9stone as “skinny” but actually isn’t that healthy for someone who is just over 5ft? There should not be any shame in trying to reach a healthy weight. I kinda feel like we have lost sight of what is a healthy weight.

at 11stone/12stone, I’m not my healthiest, I’m not my fittest, I don’t look good. I’m opening myself up to more health conditions. Clothes make me look like a beach ball. I’m quite large chested and instead of making me look sexy/attractive, I just look ridiculous and almost ball shaped.

The NHS website accounts for how BMI varies for people from different ethnic groups and muscle being denser than fat. BMI requires a bit of context and obviously there are some outliers, like the All Blacks.

On the whole, though, it works on statistics. When your BMI is 25, you have a greater chance of developing weight-related health issues and the higher you go, the more likely it is.

BMI isn't an indicator of attractiveness or human worth. You can be beautiful and vivacious with a high BMI, or ugly and nasty with a normal one. But it's been kept around so long because statistically, it's a pretty good rough tool, especially when you contextualise it like the NHS does.

When your BMI is 25, you have a greater chance of developing weight-related health issues and the higher you go, the more likely it is

When my BMI was 25, I basically ate one meal a day. God knows how little I'd actually have to eat to get it lower

What was the meal?

This was a good twenty years ago when I was in my early twenties...and I'm not going to be drawn into this nasty little discussion where you can make passive aggressive digs at me to insinuate I'm a greedy cow....I've seen how these threads go.

But suffice to say it was a normal meal...I didn't go to the chip shop and order one of everything.

But my point is I've been a healthy weight according to the BMI albeit at the top end and to achieve that I've had to skip meals. My friend has a healthy BMI...she slips breakfast and lunch.

I do wish people would stop making out that a healthy BMI is achievable so long as you're not a huge glutton.

I'm not going to be drawn into this nasty little discussion where you can make passive aggressive digs at me to insinuate I'm a greedy cow....I've seen how these threads go.

I'm not trying to draw you into or insinuate anything. I'm not interested in shaming anyone, as you can tell from my previous posts. You volunteered that you were overweight on one meal a day. The obvious next question is "what was it?"

You may be right, but without knowing a person's consumption, we simply don't know. Can't make any statements if we don't have all the information.

For whatever it's worth, although I don't think BMI is total bollocks, I also don't think it's the be all and end all. I think we should positively encourage good eating and exercise even if they don't make you slim, and I certainly don't believe you need a normal BMI to be attractive or live a great life.

Aw he loves ya. You are right though OP about our perceptions having changed

just that BMI might not be the most accurate reflection of a person's weight/health. BMI doesn't take into account age, ethnicity, muscle v fat and various other things.

I don't think anyone is claiming BMI on its own is a reflection of health. It absolutely is a reflection of someone's weight. As I said above it's a tool to help give a picture of overall health.
It's quick, it's free, it's easily accessible.
It does take age and ethnicity into account.
Someone with a healthy BMI is less likely to have conditions associated with being over or underweight.

If your BMI is 25 - 27, but you have low to normal blood pressure, cholesterol and blood sugar under control, healthy waist measurement to height ratio, eat a good, varied diet and take plenty of exercise, it is vanishingly unlikely that you will develop a weight-related health condition in the near future. If you have normal BMI but are apple shaped and your height to waist measurement ratio puts you into the unhealthy range, your blood pressure is high, you eat a poor unnutritious diet, your cholesterol is too high and you have blood sugar issues, it is much more likely that you will develop a health condition in the near future. Read a few proper medical articles. It ain't all about BMI.

Yes exactly. My dh has a healthy BMI...he has several medical conditions that are associated with being overweight. It's genetic for him.

My mother at 7 and a half stone for most of her life had type 2 diabetes. It might be rare but it happens. She got weary of every medic she saw expressing surprise at her diabetes. My brother developed type 2 as well, he is also slim.

I agree with you.

I am the same height as you and currently I am 9 stone 11, usually I’m 9 and a half but it’s been my birthday plus a few other events and general business so I’ve put on a few. Im at the very top end of my BMI, and am a pear so have pretty chunky wobbly thighs and bum, but also quite a big tummy at the moment. I try to be mindful of things like sugar and white carbs but whenever I decline a cake or a second helping of mash or whatever I get eye rolls, told how skinny I am, don’t need to worry about my weight etc. It’s so annoying. I’m not skinny, not at all. And I don’t ‘worry’ about it really - like I said, I’m mindful, but if I really want something I will have it, I just try my best to make good choices as much as I can. I do enjoy meals out, wine etc as much as the next person so I wouldn’t bother trying to get below my 9 and a half stone baseline as it’s not worth it to me- I am happy and healthy as I am. But I wish people would accept that and stop the constant comments! Going on holiday with a few of the culprits this year so I wonder if they will clock my flabby arse and spare tyre and think oh actually she isn’t half as skinny as we thought 😂

Well done you for losing the weight though, it is a real slog when everything is designed to tempt you but it sounds like you are doing great.

@SpringPop I agree with you. I'm 5 foot 2 and a bit under 8 stone. I am not skinny. I'm slimmish. If I weighed 9 stone, I would not be 'normal' - I'd be overweight. People have absolutely lost sight of what normal is.

I also think a lot of women like to tell their overweight friends that they're "fine", because it makes them feel better about their own overweightness.