We’ve lost sight of what is a healthy weight

[SpringPop]

Was chatting to my husband yesterday about getting to a healthy weight.

I am 5ft3 and at start of year I was weighing 80kg (12st 8)

I have hired a PT, workout 3 x weeklyand started eating healthy and now weigh around 72kg (11st 4). I’m not restricting food types or on any fad diet. I’m literally eating a balanced diet and the correct amount to lose up to 1lb a week.

I’ve done a decent start but still want to get to below 10stone where I would be a healthy weight for my height according to BMI.

I literally look like a ball in photos I took at the weekend. So fat.

He thinks I look great and lovely. Which is very kind. I literally don’t get how done people can’t see that I look fat. He’s not just being kind.

we got chatting and I Said to him that people we watch on tv that we think are “normal” (not underweight) and are similar height to me probably weigh between 8-9 stone therefore how could he not see I was overweight and not looking great.

AIBU to think no wonder we are quite an overweight nation. We equate 8stone/9stone as “skinny” but actually isn’t that healthy for someone who is just over 5ft? There should not be any shame in trying to reach a healthy weight. I kinda feel like we have lost sight of what is a healthy weight.

at 11stone/12stone, I’m not my healthiest, I’m not my fittest, I don’t look good. I’m opening myself up to more health conditions. Clothes make me look like a beach ball. I’m quite large chested and instead of making me look sexy/attractive, I just look ridiculous and almost ball shaped.

Agree, I’m 5ft4 and look best at around 8st5. I’m very slim built though & that makes a difference.

There's research to show that 'naturally' thin people modify their diets and appetites.

They aren't eating 4000 calories a day and staying slim.

They're eating small amounts of calories (sometimes in a disordered way) or using a lot of calories (sometimes in a disordered way)

They just don't really think about it so think it happens naturally

As I said it’s a question of extent - I understand a desire to eat too much of something just not a whole pie.

They just don't really think about it so think it happens naturally

That's an important point.

We call them "naturally thin" because they don't have to diet.
Another individual may be the same size, but constantly watching every mouthful.
Naturally thin people don't think about calorie intake- they may still have healthy or unhealthy diets.
They just follow their appetites, not in denial over whether or not to eat something.

Yes I'm sure that's true generally but there ARE some people who have super metabolisms and do eat in excess of 3000 calories a day - and remain slim.
I mentioned before about my very slender friend who has to eat 3 large meals a day to stop herself losing weight (and she also eats tablespoons of oil between meals so she doesn't lose weight).
I've just remembered my friend from school. I've known her since I was 5 and I'm now 48. We've spent much time together and had numerous holidays so I know her eating habits well. She eats LOADS. Three big meals a day, often a Macdonalds or a full cream tea between meals. Definitely between 3000 and 4000 calories a day. She's always eaten like this and never been bigger than a size 8. However she was recently diagnosed with gallstones and a fatty liver. So despite the fact her body doesn't store fat and she looks incredibly healthy - she's not! She's suffering the effects of eating too much fatty food. She's just started a low fat diet (doctors orders) and lost lots of weight which she couldn't afford to lose. She now looks gaunt and unhealthy, despite the fact she needed to change her diet.
I realise the 2 friends I mention above are the exceptions. Most slim people definitely don't consume too many calories, of course.

@SallyWD

I think if they exist they are exceptionally rare.

I agree! I meant to add that both the women I me tioned have very lean mums (who also seem to eat a lot) so I do think it's genetic.

Where’s the virtue in eating healthy foods you happen to like? I really wish I liked fish and seafood. I’ve tried but I find them completely unpalatable - taste, texture, smell everything. Cod makes me actually ill. I can manage a couple of fish fingers but that’s it, and I don’t really enjoy them.

To get fat you have to consistently eat more calories than your body needs or can cope with

or you have to have a faulty metabolism caused by an underactive thyroid which predisposes your body to store fat rather than burn it off.

Why do you think this?
There are plenty of slim people walking around. Do you think most of them are consciously controlling what they eat or have unhealthy eating patterns?

I would regard myself as naturally slim. I have weighed the same pretty much all my adult life, and it's at the bottom of the BMI range. I am lean. I do love my sport (running) but is that because I am naturally good at it because of my shape or does the running keep me slim? I think the former because in periods where I have not run I don't put weight on, I think I naturally adapt my food intake to only consume what I need.
After a period of eating more than I might normally (Christmas, weddings, parties) I naturally eat less in the days following, not because I know I have to in order to control my weight, I just feel less hungry.

I believe there is research to back up this up.

The right dose of thyroxine should sort that out though in most cases. All the females in my family have this and none of us are overweight except me (by a few pounds) and if I cut out the wine and chocolate I do lose weight.

@TheOrigRights

You've just answered your own question.

Yes, I think people who say they are 'naturally' thin modify their eating or exercise habits in order to stay slim. Like you do.

Surely if it's genetic then it's natural [opens a large can of semantics]

I have never been on a diet and I've always been a size 6. I order the tasting menu at fine dining restaurants very often or go out for afternoon tea. I do some pilates and swim but that's about it.

Before I did exercise btw I was the same weight.

That doesn't tell us very much. What's your daily diet like?

I mean no one became obese from the occasional tasting menu at a fine dining restaurant

I eat a lot of fruit but I also eat a lot of pastry. This is in addition to home cooked meals. The one thing I will say is I don't eat much processed food apart from the pastry. Maybe that helps.

I go every week.

On top of meals out at regular restaurants.

But what I mean is that the 'modifying the eating habits' isn't a conscious thing, it's just following appetite.

Which is what I said. After a period of eating more than I might normally (Christmas, weddings, parties) I naturally eat less in the days following, not because I know I have to in order to control my weight, I just feel less hungry.

The point I'm trying to make is that genetics probably does help. I am sure I will get fat if I eat a tasting menu every day but it's how naughty you can be before it tips the scales.

Yes the 2 people I mentioned are naturally slim

Well GP’s are pretty rubbish at treating it ime. It’s a numbers game to them. As you are within “normal” parameters they think you’re fine but it still doesn’t mean you’re on the optimal dose for you. I’ve had one GP tell me my dose was too high and one too low. They fiddled about with different dosages for a while but in the end put me back on my original dose (75mcg). I’m 5ft 1.5 and weigh 11.5 stone. I go to the gym as often as I can from 3 times a week to every other day if I can manage it. I eat a healthy diet. But still, 11.5 stone.

I haven’t read the whole of this thread (although I’ve read many like it).

I am always perplexed that the posters who claim to be posting because they are so concerned about the health implications of being overweight are prepared to castigate people whose weight is within the healthy BMI guidelines set by the NHS and approved by NICE clinicians because they are still not ‘thin’.

Losing weight is very hard; keeping it off is even harder. Do you really think you’re helping anyone at all to reach and achieve a healthier weight, with all the benefits that brings to them and the health services, by telling them that a BMI of 25 is not good enough, because they are still fat? Or do you think you’ll discourage them from even trying to lose some weight. The journey from 25 to 20 is huge, and imagine you’ve managed to get to 25 from 30? A GP would not tell someone who has managed that to push on through to get into a size 8.

It’s fat phobia on these threads - not even disguised.