To think 11 is not too young to travel on a train alone?

[Tellmeifimwrong]

Please settle a debate! Happy to hear all opinions.

Is 11 years old, starting y7 in Sept, too young to take a one hour train journey, without parents but with a slightly younger child? Put on at one end by an adult and met at the other end by an adult, with a phone and data, and train staff informed? No behavioural problems or SEN.

I don’t want to say because their official policy and internal policy is a bit different and I don’t want them to stop letting my dd on because of a MN thread. If OP wants to dm me I’ll tell her.

This is what my local train company says about unaccompanied minors:

'Children should not travel on their own. Children should only travel alone until they are mature enough to understand the risks involved with rail travel and are confident to travel alone. It is the responsibility of the parent or guardian to make this decision'

Which goes to show that they are about as good at proof reading as they are at running a railway, but they do helpfully link to:

https://www.btp.police.uk/cp/crime-prevention/btp/railway-crime/young-people-travelling-alone/

🤔

I would not be comfortable with this.

11 year old children travelling to school on a regular route used by other school pupils is different- they have a better chance of recognising landmarks en route if they had to switch onto another bus/rail service, and they are travelling within their home city it’s likely that they’ll have phone service.

If the journey is only an hour, why can’t an adult travel with them then go back?

There are certainly patches of the wider rail network with patchy mobile coverage, so it isn’t always as simple as a phone call home if there are problems .

And it’s not like the unaccompanied minors service on flights-any train staff on duty will not be able to babysit your child.

absolutely shocking, poor woman. I’ve honestly not been on a train you could slide or open windows bar the wee pull ones at the top that pull inwards for at least 20 years. Did not think they existed anymore.

I would do this. Literally all the what ifs are somewhat mitigated by the fact that they have phones and can call a parent at the first sign of a problem. The only thing I would tell them is if anyone is acting weird or drunk or aggressive just don't engage, get up and walk to the next carriage. If necessary keep walking until you find a member of staff.

On their own, maybe, depending on the child.

Responsible for a younger child - absolutely not.

At this age my eldest was going on a simple train journey regularly, alone, put on the train by me and met by her dad the other end. But I used to get her a first class ticket, for kids tickets there’s not much difference in price, less likelihood of encountering rowdiness or weirdos, free snacks and more attentiveness from the staff.

My youngest is 12 and regularly goes off with friends or on her own to meet friends in nearby towns and cities. She’s a lot more gung-ho than my eldest!

That would be impossible these days. The only train working public services with droplight windows is the Night Riviera sleeper, and they've now got central locking.

The 11year old is ok if the child feels confident but not the responsibility for a younger child.

OP which operating company is it? I'd get them to sit somewhere close to where staff will be easy to find (often at the back on trains that still have proper guards, or next to the buffet with intercity operators like Avanti).

Ignore the posts about the police being called, there's no minimum age for unaccompanied travel, it's at the discretion of the parent. A couple of children waved onto a train by an adult, and who can produce valid ticket are not going to flag up a safeguarding concern. It's the ones with no money, or suspiciously large sums of cash who get flagged up as possible runaways or county lines mules.

Impress upon them that if anything happens they must phone immediately. Also point out where they can find a member of staff and how they can summon one if they can't find them - wheelchair spaces and accessible toilets are equipped with "call for aid" buttons which will summon staff without doing anything drastic like stopping the train.

Like PPs though, I wouldn't make the 11 year old "responsible" for the 10 year old. They need to both be capable.

I looked after my 3 brothers from the age of 7, I used to catch the train by myself to school from year 5, this included 10 minute walk to the station, 20 minutes train ride, 20 minute walk to school and back again without a phone as they were only just starting to become a thing. It really depends on the children, obviously looking after 3 young children at 7 years old in todays world would be considered a massive issue but in the 90s nobody blinked.
Do they feel comfortable with it? Are they sensible (not mature, sensible). Do they go out to play alone? Do they stay at home alone? Do they have a phone?
Could something happen, yes possibly but unlikely. People get so obsessed with stranger danger but it’s actually a lot more likely that it’s someone they know like about 90% more. End of the day, parents know their kids, would they be able to cope with it? Would they behave?

11 yo old:fine
11yo responsible for younger child;not fine

In my case, I have a 12 and a 13 year old. Train was suggested as a way to get them to school. These two squabble, push and shove all the bloody time. The thought of letting them near train tracks terrifies me. I drive 45 mins one way to get them to school.

I got a 20 min train to school every day when I was 11

Some of the things I did at that age were ridiculously stupid and dangerous. I was constantly in trouble at school and always on the look out for "fun" as I saw it. It's totally child dependent and relying on random people on the Internet to make the decision for you isn't sensible.

Looking after 3 younger kids at 7 years old definitely would have been considered neglect in the 90s sorry. No one I grew up with then was doing that.

My father was seriously sexually assaulted on a train at this age. If you do let the child, can you have some very specific converstations about keeping themselves safe as it will probably be fairly visible that thry have no adult. Sorry to be doom and gloom. I know stranger attack is incredibly rare.

I think everything you have said it reasonable apart from being with a younger child, it is too young to be responsible for someone else as well, even if it is only a year or two difference. Wait till younger one is 11 to do something like that

To school and back during the day? Fine. At night after a football match? No.

I would be happy with this scenario (one hour, no changes, adult at each end), but I explicitly wouldn't consider the older child to be 'responsible' for the younger one. At 11 and 10 they are responsible for themselves and each other.

When I first left my older two alone at home together (they were 10 and very nearly 8) it was on a 'safety in numbers' principle and not framing the older one as having any responsibility - that would have been unfair. (And obviously after checking they were happy with it and an assessment of capability to manage).

(And I was gone about 45 min)

I think you need to consider other factors. time of day? Stops along the way? Have they been on that train journey before? Personally I wouldn't and mine was responsible enough. But my issue isn't how responsible are they? More what about other weirdos? Children get snatched under their parents noses regularly. Maybe I'm being over protective but I wouldn't risk a train journey without a responsible adult. I would never forgive myself if something did happen.

On their own I would be OK assuming they are not somehow younger than their age. Not comfortable about responsibility for a younger sibling though.

The nature of the train service might make me think differently, especially the frequency of the trains. Somewhere with the kind of frequency of London Overground is very different from the presently low frequency and unreliable services in parts of the north of England.

I think an hour journey is too long. Different if it was 20 minutes.