Or are school re DD’s earrings?

[Tygertiger]

Totally prepared to be told IABU so please don’t pile on me!

DD is Y5. She had her ears pierced a few weeks ago - deliberately now, so they’ve got ages to heal before she goes to secondary school and isn’t allowed them. I took her to a professional piercer so they were done with a needle not a gun, and therefore have labret studs in (ie flat backs not butterflies). The fronts are really tiny studs, basically flat against her earlobes. They really are the smallest studs she could be wearing and as both sides are flat against her lobes, they are as minimal risk for physical activity as they could be. DD is very active and does swimming, dance and gymnastics and all her coaches are happy for her to wear them.

School aren’t letting her do PE. I can understand that (although I think it’s unnecessary, I’m not going to query it). However, they’re also not letting her do Bikeability. This is a course with external coaches for kids who are already able to ride bikes, which teaches them road safety etc. School are saying she can only do it if she takes her earrings out.

I’ve checked with the Bikeability coaches (not in a weird stalker way, they all work at the local leisure centre so I asked them while we were there) and this is not their policy - they confirmed they go into other schools and don’t insist on children removing earrings in order to take part. They’re not bothered at all. It’s the school’s own policy. DD rides her bike all the time at home with her earrings in.

So WIBU to ask school if she can do it if I sign some kind of disclaimer to say I will not hold them responsible in any way if she falls off her bike and her earring causes damage? Or do we just have to take the earrings out? She’s desperate to do the course so sitting it out won’t be an option.

Come and take them out just before; pop back straight after and put them back in.
No earrings at my school either. I’ve seen them caught and pulled out through the lobe; disclaimer or not, I’m not dealing with that.
You could have done the beginning of summer if you’d wanted them to heal before secondary. She’s only Y5 - prioritise the opportunities she’s getting in her current school, rather than prioritising what’s happening in 18 months.

Why not pierce her ears in the summer holidays?

I don't agree with stupid arbitrary school rules, but surely you could have avoided this?

Can they not be taped or is that against school policy?

Why didn't you wait until the start of the summer holidays?

Well it was a bloody daft thing to do given most schools don't allow children to have earrings in during pe. It's absolutely the schools right to say she cannot take part in activities whilst wearing earrings as it is their school policy.

Waiting until the holidays is irrelevant now, that horse has bolted.

Could you teach her to remove and replace the earrings? Then she can take them out before PE and Bikeability and put them back in afterwards.

Put a plaster over them to stop them catching? That's what DS did with his ...

If the school policy is no earrings for PE and bikeability falls under their policy then that's the risk you take by choosing to get a year 5 child's ears pierced through term time rather than the summer holidays.

Because whatever Claire’s Accessories say, piercings take a lot longer than 6 weeks to heal to the point where they can be left out for hours at a time. So it didn’t seem particularly important to do them in the 6 weeks’ holiday. They’re allowed them in school anyway, just not for PE. As noted, I don’t have an issue with this, even though I privately think it’s excessive. It’s just the Bikeability I think is daft. Do you really think it’s dangerous for a child to ride a bike with tiny studs in?

We will definitely take them out if the school insist on it, but I suspect that will be enough time for them not to go back in again. I’m not going to make a fuss about it. I just think it’s a bit excessive really.

Why didn't you wait until start of holidays? You'll just have to explain to her that because she didn't wait she'll have to miss out

I’ve already offered to tape them, they’ve said no.

Ah well, you tried

I think school are putting their foot down to try and discourage parents getting children's ears pierced and tbh I tend to agree with them as I just don't see the need for children to have it done.

What about silicone retainers? You can get them off Amazon, they're clear so not obviously visible and if they get caught they just ping loose without causing any injury to the ear.

Schools have to have rules. They have to be blanket rules because of parents who try to get round them.

could She do bikeability somewhere else? Through the leisure centre or a charity place (our big country park has a cycling centre that do this type of stuff).

Of course I’m not going to do this. I’m not going to shame her. It’s on me, not on her. If needed the earrings will come out. My point is I think it’s unnecessary, but it’s not DD’s fault, I’m the adult!

My dd had her ears pierced aged 6 and she's always been allowed to wear them throughout school, loads of them in her class have.

I’ve offered that too. Honestly, the ones she has are tiny and flat so actually the same shape and size, so it wouldn’t actually make any difference.

Well yeah you tell her because you didn't make her wait then.

I'd just take them out and have them re done in the holidays if she still really wants them.

YABU because you should have checked.
Plenty of kids get them done at the start of the holidays. 6 weeks is plenty of time. It always has been

To be fair I've still witnessed some pretty bad injuries even when earrings have been taped so I can see why they said no. The school policy is a blanket no, which you knew I'm advance and therefore unless she learns to take them out then it's daft moaning about the policy.

They’re perfectly happy for kids to have earrings in, just not for PE. Your personal views aren’t really relevant to the thread. I don’t agree with small children having theirs done but DD was ten, requested it herself, and the studio wouldn’t do it until she had independently consented and could explain back to them how she needed to care for them afterwards. I think that’s sufficient consent really.

You said you had done by a professional piercer but then mentioned Claire’s…. definitely not a professional. Look up advice from elsewhere.

That wasn’t meant to sound arsy!